In Love With My Band

"Hello?" I panted into the phone. I was down in the kitchen when it had started ringing so I had to run all the way upstairs.

"Kasey? Don't forget about the Festival today. We're performing tonight." I had to admit I was a little disappointed in hearing Shane instead of my father.

"You mean you guys are performing, I'm not going. I am NOT in your band." Despite singing last night in front of everyone.

"Like it or not, you are. Everyone will expect you to be there.... if you don't show, just think about the kind of welcome you'll get at school when everyone knows you blew of Graveyard Smash." His tone was threatening but I thought I heard regret underneath it all, like he didn't want to shove the truth in my face. But he was right.... after his announcement last night, it's bound to be all over town by now, and if I didn't show, the town won't be so pleased.

"I-I, ummm, I don't know any of your songs though." Just thinking about the treatment I'd surely get when school started had me fidgeting and my stupid stutter was kicking in. It always kicked in when I was nervous. And if I did sing in front of everyone, I would be nervous. The only reason I wasn't last night was because I was to angry to be nervous.

"We'll find a song everyone knows." He reassured me. It didn't help.

"B-but I can't sing in front of everyone! I'll screw up." I protested. I just couldn't do this.

"You did extremely well last night. In fact you-"

"But that's only cause I was angry! If I wasn't angry I'd have been to nervous to even make out one word!" My stuttering finally stopped, only because I was angry that I had not much choice but to go through with it. I was soo desperate to get that through to him I didn't realize what he had said, and what he was going to say.

"Kasey..." Was all he said.

"Shane, I'm really sorry, but unless I'm really pissed off at like the crowd or someone, then there is nooo way I'm getting on that stage. I'm not even sure what I'd be able to sing!" My voice sounded desperate, like a little kids, and I wondered if I really was that desperate not to do this..... I know I was scared enough not to do this.... but the price to pay was to great if I didn't.

It was quiet for awhile and then suddenly, I could tell that Shane had figured out exactly how to solve this problem.

"Then you'll sing Evanesence with Greg." I knew exactly what song he was talking about and the thought of singing THAT song, my favorite Evanesence song, with Greg, did piss me off.

And Shane knew that, he knew all that.

It was perfect, I knew I could sing that song, anywhere, if it was with Greg.... only because I hate him enough to get angry because we'd be singing a song together...... and even though I knew I could do it now, I still didn't like it.

And I told Shane that. And without telling him if I was going to sing or not, I hung up.

I stared out my bedroom window out over the park next to the mansion. Little kids ran around and played on the swings and jungle gyms. A little girl with pigtails was pushed of her swing by a group of larger boys. The little girls watching giggled and pointed at her, laughed at her. I thought she was going to cry, because that's what I did when stuff like that happened to me.... but the little girl with pigtails surprised them all, even me.

She stood up straight and glared at the boy who pushed her. He tried to push her again but pushed him before he got the chance. He fell to the ground and she glared at him, then, after yelling at him, the girls stopped giggling and walked off, looking behind them as if the girl with pigtails was going to come after them. The boy scrambled to his feet, grabbed his friends, yelled a few words and left. The girl with pigtails got back on the swing and smiled to herself, and it looked like she was singing.

I was still surprised that a little girl who was clearly out numbered stood up to all of them and scared them away. But even so, seeing that little girl do the very thing I never could, gave me the answer to the question I left Shane with.

I knew what I was going to do. I wasn't going to be some coward, and let them all scare me. I wanted to sing, I wanted to show them that I'm not going to take any crap.

So with that last thought, I searched my closet for something festival-ish and grabbed my car keys.

No point in running now..... I never wanted to run away again.