Love Never Fails

"Hey Sarah, do you know where I left my phone?" Eva looked up from rifling through the couch pillows and waited for an answer. Sarah stopped what she was doing momentarily, pressing the laundry basket full of her and Alex's clothes to her side, and turned to face Eva.
"I don't think so. Do you remember the last time you saw it?" Eva sighed and fell onto the couch. The past few days had been rough. She ended up staying at Alex and Sarah's house since she had nowhere else to go. She made them swear to her that they wouldn't tell Sasha and she even hid upstairs when he came knocking on their door, wasted and upset the other night at 12:30 am. Seeing him like that made Eva want to run downstairs, scoop him up in a big hug and take care of him; make him lie down even though he didn't want to and bring him glasses of water and aspirin in the morning. But those days were gone and Eva knew she couldn't trust Sasha anymore. That's what hurt; Sasha had broken her trust after she had given him everything... That's what hurt.
"Are you okay?" Eva heard Sarah behind her and she looked up to see a concerned look etched across Sarah's features. Eva shook her head and looked down at the black leather cushions beneath her, focusing on every crease and fold in the material. She didn't want to cry, she wanted to be strong. Now that she was pregnant- becoming a mother, she felt like she had to be a responsible adult and crying was not being responsible.
"Honey, talk to me." Eva looked up at Sarah, who had sat down next to her on the couch.
The lump in her throat made it hard to talk. Eva knew if she opened her mouth, she would start to bawl. Instead, she shook her head and turned away, putting her head in her hands and massaging her forehead gently. She heard Sarah sigh and felt the warm touch of her best friend's hand. "It's okay, sweetie, you'll get through it." Eva couldn't take it anymore and leaned forward, emitting a lowly sob. She continued to cry as Sarah embraced her, rocking her back and forth. Before Sarah could really say anything, Eva pulled away and wiped her eyes.
"Excuse me." Eva took a deep breath and closed her eyes for a moment. She would not, could not break down like this. Not now... not here.
"No, it's fine. It's good to let it out sometimes." Eva glanced over at Sarah and leaned back on the couch, another sigh escaping her lips.
"You know I can't afford that right now." Eva leaned forward again and looked up at Sarah. Eva didn't want to let it out, in fact, she wanted to push it away. There was a silence as Sarah watched Eva suspiciously from her spot on the couch.
"Well, You can talk to me anytime." After a moment's hesitation, Sarah got up and made her way upstairs.
Eva sat quiet on the couch. She missed Sasha, she missed him so much. He wouldn't have left her alone, he would've stayed and kissed the side of her head; held her as she dealt with her emotional turmoil. He would've let her known he loved her and that it will all be okay in the end. Yet, here Eva sat, alone, wishing he was here.
"Fuuuck.." She murmured and got up, trying hard to push him away from her thoughts, and went to the guest room, in search of her long forgotten phone.
The first place she decided to check was the bedside table, then the bathroom, under the bed, in the dresser, on the dresser, but it was nowhere to be found. Eva was about to give up and relax, but stopped when she remembered her half open suitcase in the corner of the room.
"I wonder.." She said aloud to herself, going over and kneeling down in front of it. She moved a couple of items of clothing around, but did not find her phone. In fact, she found something quite different. Eva sat back, holding a small envelope in her hands with her name written in Russian on the front. Eva knew exactly who it was from, but had trouble deciding whether she should open it or not. She reached a hand to her face and felt the place that he'd hit her. His angry face kept flashing over and over again in her head, compelling her to leave it. But something akin to a deep rooted yearning made her open it.
As Eva lifted the lid and turned the envelope to empty it's contents, a diamond ring fell into her hand, followed by a letter. Eva took a deep breath and closed her eyes, trying to prepare herself, but nothing could prepare her for the words that awaited her on the page.
With shaking hands, she opened the folds of the letter:

I remember the day I met you. You were sitting on a bench at the park. I was nervous, but at the same time upset for being so flustered over a pretty girl. I was mature enough to handle this and I knew it, but something about you terrified me. You were absolutely electrifying. I approached you with caution, but you welcomed me with open arms. I stuttered over my words and you struggled to understand them as you were simply learning Russian at the time. Somehow, we understood each other. Somehow, we made it work. I thank God for that day. Every time I see your beautiful eyes; hear your enchanting voice.. You mean everything to me. You make me feel things that I thought never existed. At times, I can't get you out of my head. I'm sorry. Sorry for all the fucked up things I've done. All of the pain, the misery, the heart break I've caused you. I never want to see you like that and it hurts knowing you feel like that because of me. The ring is yours to keep. I love you, my sweet girl. I love you, Eva. I love you.

Tears fell from Eva's eyes as she finished the letter. Her heart was torn to pieces as it was at battle with her mind. Should she forgive him? She looked at the beautiful diamond ring in her hand as if it were his dying gift to her. Slowly, she slipped it on her hand and marveled at it's beauty through tear clouded eyes.
Eva knew that she loved him, in fact she wanted nothing more than to have a family with him, but she couldn't stop thinking about that night. What if he hit her again, or worse, what if he hit the kids? Eva pushed those thoughts from her mind, scolding herself for being so ridiculous. However, the questions still lingered in the back of her mind. She couldn't trust him anymore.
Eva stood up with the letter, wiping her tears away and went to find Sarah.
She ventured downstairs, but stopped halfway down the steps when she saw Sasha, sitting on the couch. He looked up at her with sadness in his eyes.
"Sasha," Eva whispered, letting her arms drop to her side. Her heart was beating a million miles a minute. He stood up and cautiously approached her, only this times, her arms weren't exactly open.
"You got my letter then," he said, gesturing to the ring on her hand. Eva pulled her hand behind her back and looked down. The lump in her throat was back and she didn't know what to do. Her head and her heart seemed to be at the height of their battle right now. It tore her insides up.
"Hey... Hey, look at me." Sasha put a hand on her chin and pulled her face towards his, kissing her lips gently. The kiss was soft- cautious, as if they were new lovers. He was shocked when she didn't pull away. When they parted, Eva said,
"I can't trust you." She put her hand on top of his, gently pulling it away from her face. Sasha looked up, trying to keep himself from breaking down, but it was difficult.
"Eva, please forgive me. Please." He didn't know what else to ask as he looked back down at her now tear stained face. That's all he really wanted; forgiveness.
Eva stared hard into his deep brown eyes as if she was trying to find the answer to life in them, but all she saw was heart break. She felt the ring on her finger, the letter in her hand, his hand on hers. Yet all her mind saw was the image of that night... the anger, the rage.
"I don't know if I can," Her voice was strained and quiet. It sounded as if she hadn't talked in years.
Sasha bit his lip, trying his hardest to compose himself, but she was tearing him apart, piece by piece.
"I would cut off my hands for you if you wanted me too." Sasha leaned his forehead against hers and put his free hand to her face. Eva chuckled, tears still coming down her face.
They stayed like that for a moment, relishing in the hell they currently shared with each other. Both person just wanting to jump into each others arms, but they knew they couldn't, not yet.
"Sasha," Eva breathed deeply, "Promise me. Promise me that this will never happen again."
"I promise," he whispered, tears now slipping down his face. He felt as if a huge weight had been lifted off his shoulders, as if the world were at peace, if only for a moment.
There was silence as they looked into each others eyes. Nothing existed but them.
"I love you," He whispered, running his thumb over the bruise on her face.
"Forever?" She asked.
"Forever." He said, as he gently laid his lips against hers once again.