Green and Gray

I was with Landon. We were eating dinner at an Italian bistro and he was making me laugh. We were having a really great time and I had no where else I wanted to be. Even though our senses of humor were a little different ( he was British), we still made each other laugh. I loved spending time with him and I couldn't help but feel like he felt the same about me. I felt this way just by how much he smiled every time we were together.

“How was your day, Love?” Landon politely asked while twirling angel hair pasta onto his fork quite professionally.

I swallowed my bite of five cheese pasta then gently wiped underneath my bottom lip, trying not to smudge my foundation/powder and red lipstick. My day was full of working at Lamour's, getting the hang of being in charge of a whole store. One of our jewelry distributors sent a whole shipment of nothing we had ordered, so I was on the phone for the better part of the day with the company that sent them. “It could have been better.” I shrugged as I stabbed my fork into my pile of mostacolli noodles.

“Awh, what happened, Love?”

I couldn't stop the smile from forming on my lips if I tried, “Just some shipment problem I don't want to bore you with. I'm better now that I'm here with you.” I reached across the table and squeezed his soft, warm hand. He flashed me all of his perfectly straight, perfectly white teeth.

We stayed like that, smiling at each other, before my phone buzzed noisily on the wooden table next to my plate. I wasn't going to check it, but the bolded name at the top quickly caught my attention, “I'm sorry.” I apologized before picking the iPhone up and opening the text message.

“JohnOh: What are you doing on Friday?”

Furrowing my eyebrows, I tapped on the touchscreen, “Working. Why?”

Almost immediately I got another message.

“I need a date to Loren and Lex's wedding.”

My eyes widened considerably but fully recovered quickly. I glanced up at my boyfriend. He was enjoying his pasta and looked very pleased. “Babe, what's on the agenda this weekend?” I subtly asked. Was I really thinking about going to a wedding as somebody else's date?

He set his fork down on the side of his plate, “Uhm, I, uh, actually have to drive my father out to California to meet with a specialist.”

My brow furrowed once more, “Is that even safe for him being so sick and all?”

He quickly nodded, “Yeah, we got approved by his doctor here.” He picked his fork up once again and stabbed it into this pasta, “We're leaving Friday morning.” My eyes trailed back over to my phone and my fingers twitched. “I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner.” He frowned, “That's two weekends in a row we won't be together.”

I frowned at the thought, “That really sucks.”

He smiled sadly at me then reached across the wooden table and squeezed my hand, much like I had earlier, “How about next weekend, we spend all the time we can together.” He suggested with a smile and I nodded enthusiastically.

“That sounds like a really good idea.” My mind flew to all the possibilities of what we could spend time doing. I had a feeling that we wouldn't be leaving the bedroom that much, though.

My phone buzzed again. “JohnOh: Just as friends! I hope you didn't take that the wrong way.”

“When should I be ready?”

It ended up being that John was in the wedding party and I got stuck sitting by myself in the audience, sandwiched between one of Loren's cousins and a friend of Lex's. My body shivered, seeing as we were outdoors. Who had a wedding outside in the middle of December? I guessed since it's Arizona it's not that ridiculous of an idea, but it seemed ridiculous to me.

The ceremony was beautiful and even though I'd only talked to them briefly one time at the party the week before, I still shed a few tears. I bawled my eyes out at Winter's wedding and and knew I would bawl them out at Clover's. Lord only knows what I would do at my own. I was a sap when it came to weddings.

While John went off and took wedding photos with the rest of the wedding party, I sat with Garrett, Eric, and Kennedy in the reception area. Of course it was outside like the wedding was.

“So, how come none of you were in the wedding?” I questioned then took a sip of my sweet iced tea.

The three of them looked at one another then almost as if on cue, they shrugged, “You'd think I'd be in it since he was in Rocket for a while.” Eric said, “But nope, Fag O'Callaghan and the mustache man get to be the chosen ones.” He said, referring to Austin.

Garrett and Kennedy both snorted in laughter all the while I looked at Eric, baffled, “Way to hide your bitterness, Halvo.” Kennedy laughed, but Eric just shrugged.

An announcer came over the speakers and announced that the wedding party were going to be arriving. Pair by pair they came in until Loren and Lex were announced. They looked so genuinely happy. Their love was real and I envied how in love they were. I only hoped what I had with Landon bloomed into something as special as theirs.

“Hey,” John said in a rush as he sat down in the vacant seat next to mine.

“Hi.” I smiled brightly at him, not even hiding the fact that I was so happy.

“How'd you like it?” He asked with a smile and I nodded.

“It was adorable. They're so in love and so happy.”

He continued to smile at me and nodded, “Yeah, they really make a great couple.” We watched the newlyweds across the lawn, giggling and whispering things to each other from their table at the front of the area. Suddenly, John turned back to me, “What about me? How good did I look?”

I rolled my eyes, but smiled nonetheless, “You looked very handsome in your semi-tux.” I reached over and patted his chest, where all that lied were black suspenders and a long-sleeved white button up. He hadn't stopped smiling at me since he sat down and I couldn't help but to continue on smiling as well.

The food was served and the sun was set. My body shivered more and more. I despised how cold my body got so quickly. I really needed to move somewhere that never got cold. Cabo San Lucas, Mexico sounded good to me.

“Man, I wish I had a jacket so I could let you wear it.” John said, voice coated with worry. We were on the main course of the meal and my fingers had turned numb. He seemed distressed when I looked over at him.

“It's fine.” I grinned at him.

“No, it's not.” He looked around then stopped when his eyes landed on his bandmates, “Garrett, let Sparrow wear your blazer.” He practically demanded.

My eyes widened at his words while Garrett looked over at me, brow creased in confusion, “No, Garrett, it's fine.” I assured. John roll his eyes and Garrett began to shrug himself out of his navy blue blazer.

“Spare, you're shaking like a fucking leaf. Take it.” He said as he passed it over.

Begrudgingly, I accepted it, but was grateful when I pulled it on over my bare shoulders, “Thank you.” I sighed when I settled into the slightly too big blazer.

He smiled in response, “It's no problem.” I continued on, feeling warmer than before.

“Why wouldn't you bring something to keep you warm?” John questioned, leaning in close to me. I rolled my eyes as I looked over at him, annoyed, “What!?” He exclaimed innocently.

“You didn't tell me that it was outside!” I exclaimed and he snickered. I scowled while he tried to hold back a laugh, “You're a jerk.”

He was smiling while he looked at me, “I'm sorry, Sparrow.” I didn't believe him, “I completely forgot to mention it to you.” I rolled my eyes once more and went back to my grilled chicken, “Oh, come on, if I didn't care I wouldn't have shown concern.” He was right. I wasn't even that upset. I was just cold.

I looked down and turned my head just the slightest, making eye contact. With a wink, I grinned. A smile broke out across his lips again.


A while later, after the dessert was handed out and eaten and the newlyweds had their first dance, we were still sitting there, talking and joking around. John had decided against drinking much, even though most everyone gave him shit for it. I was grateful. Garrett and Kennedy had gone off and many people had come by to greet John.

John and I had just finished a conversation about our favorite childhood vacations when a woman with pale blonde hair walked up to us, “Oh, John, hello Sweetie.” She smiled widely.

“Well hello, Mrs. Brinton. How are you?” He asked as he stood and hugged her.

“I'm good.” She responded once they pulled away. She then turned to me, “Who is this, John? Your girlfriend?” It was ridiculous how many times we had gotten asked that question throughout the night.

“Uh, no, Mrs. Brinton, this is my friend Sparrow.” He introduced once he was back in his seat, “Sparrow, this is Loren's mother.”

We shook hands and said hellos, “Well, Dear, you sure are a pretty thing.” I smiled as a thank you, “It's a shame you're just friends, John; you guys would make such an attractive couple.”

John chuckled, “Well, thank you very much, but she's already taken.”

She clucked her tongue and frowned, “What a shame. How long have you been with you boyfriend, Dear?” She questioned politely.

“Uh, a month and a half.” I answered.

Her whole demeanor changed, “Oh, well you still have a chance, John!” she smiled as she patted him twice on the back then walked away.

My mouth was left hanging open, quite speechless. John, on the other hand, just laughed. It was nice to know that people, even strangers, believe in my relationship with Landon.

“Speaking of your boyfriend, what is he doing tonight?” He asked as his arm rested on the back of my chair.

“He's actually in California, seeing a specialist for his dad's cancer.” My answer made him purse his lips. I knew he had something he wanted to say, but he kept it to himself. I really didn't want to hear what he had to say anyway.

“So, uh, other than him not calling when you were gone, he's treating you well?” He sounded as if he thought he was walking on eggshells with me.

“Yeah, he's really good to me. He makes me feel good.” In more ways than one. I knew he caught on to my hidden meaning because he grimaced.

“Well... that's nice.” It really sucked how awkward things got between the two of us whenever Landon was brought up.

After some time and some awkward silence, he turned to me, “Come on, let's dance.”

I stared at him, horrified, “Seriously?”

He nodded eagerly, “Yeah! Come on!” He stood up and offered me his hand.

“Do you see these heels I'm wearing?” I extended my leg out into the open to show him the five inch Christian Louboutin glitter pumps I was wearing.

“Yeah, they're very sparkly.”

I rolled my eyes, “These shoes cost almost a grand and are five inches high.”

His eyes widened at the information I was giving him, “You spent a grand on a pair of fucking shoes?!”

“No! No, no, no! Are you crazy? I don't make that much money.” I knew he was confused, but I was hoping it would throw him off and sit back down.

“Come on!” He grabbed my wrist and hoisted me out of my chair.

“John!” I whined as he dragged me to the dance floor.

“Don't be such a party pooper, Sparrow! Have fun and dance with me!” His smile was what made me cave in.

So even though my toes were numb and my legs had goosebumps, I let him twirl me out onto the dancefloor and show me his dancemoves while “Something Stupid” by Frank and Nancy Sinatra played. We danced and I couldn't help but laugh. He was smiling and I was smiling and the song made my heart swell.

“The time is right, your perfume fills my head, the stars get red, and oh the night's so blue.” He sang along with the music.

“And then I go and spoil it all by saying something stupid like “I love you.”” I sang back with a huge grin.

He seemed mildly surprised that I knew the words, “I didn't peg you as a Sinatra fan.” He said as he brought me in close and slowed down to match the beat of “Nude” by Radiohead.

I smirked, placing my hands around his neck. With the heels, it was much easier to do since the added height made me six feet tall, “My dad is a huge Sinatra fan. I grew up listening to him. My parents danced to “Fly Me to the Moon” at their wedding.” I smiled.

“Your parents seem like very cool people.”

My heart swelled again, “Maybe you can meet them one day.”

He nodded with a smile that matched my own, “I'd like that.”

I was staring into his eyes. It was like I couldn't look away from them. Something was pulling me toward him. I blinked, realizing what was going on. He seemed to have realized, too, because his eyes were wide and he fidgeted.

He looked down then back up at me, “So, tell me, where'd you get those flashy shoes?”

“Uhh,” I cleared my throat awkwardly, “Well, my cousin is a model that lives in Paris full time. We were really close growing up because she lived with us and we shared a room. So, every month, she send me a big package of designer clothes, shoes, and accessories.” I explained and he nodded, seemingly impressed, “She gets a lot of stuff for free since she's pretty popular, but usually she doesn't like most of it and we just happen to be the same size in everything.” The song changed, but it was another slow one – some country song I wasn't very interested in.

“Well, that's pretty cool; everybody loves free shit.”

I nodded with a laugh, “Anyways, what's up with your band? When are you guys going on tour again?”

He looked up to the night sky and let out a long sigh, “Oh man, uh, some time in February, I think.”

I wouldn't lie and say I wasn't surprised, because I was. I was assuming he'd be gone at the beginning of January, “Oh! So I guess that means we'll be seeing a lot more of each other.” It shouldn't have made me as excited as it did, but I hadn't really been making a lot of smart decisions as of late.

“I guess we will.”

The feelings I was feeling for him weren't the feelings someone with a boyfriend should have.