Achin' in My Heart

Castiel watched as the battle before his eyes had come to end. He sighed, holding back a tear before he vanished from his spot and reappeared in front of the elder Winchester boy - Dean's head softly lulled to the side as he emitted snores. Castiel took a seat and thought back on the fight, he thought it was Heaven and Earth's only option but their saviour proved to fail, now it was up to the last Winchester. Dean awoke, feeling eyes burning into him, Castiel stood up the second he noticed the difference in Dean's behaviour. He looked down at Dean as the other of the two was only barely waking up. Castiel's gruff voice alerted Dean to stare up into Castiel's eyes.

"The battle has ended," Castiel began. "A side has won the apocalypse."

Dean spoke up. "Come on, Cas, hurry up already. We don't have all day, and where is Sammy?" Castiel's eyes softened. Dean's eye opened wide, realisation smacking him in the chest, where his heart stood shattered. He fell to the floor, but before he could Castiel gathered him up, holding him in a fetal position.

"Don't say it, Cas, please don't." Dean pleaded, wishing it wasn't true.

"I'm sorry, Dean, but Sam didn't make it through to the other end." Castiel sat Dean down on the bed, sitting beside him as he watched the tears gather in Dean's eyes. Castiel felt something stir in his chest, a longing to wipe away any sadness that gathered in the eyes of the beauty before him. He felt human now more than he had ever before, he could feel that his human carrier had never felt this strong connection to his family. Castiel now felt human, destructible and willing to love.

"Damn it, Cas, I told you not to say it!" Dean yelled in frustration. Dean stood in aggravation and walked to the wall before pounding both his fists into the wall. "I told you not to fucking say it, Cas!"

"I'm sorry, but you're our only hope, Dean. We need you to fight Lucifer." Dean shook his head.

"No. No, I'm not going into battle so soon after my little brother has died. I've lost everyone now, Cas, my mother, my father, and now, my little brother, Sammy. This doesn't need to go on any further for me, I'm just going to walk away from this and start a family. Be normal." Dean removed his fists from the wall, turned around and looked down at Castiel on the bed, Castiel stared back with the same determination -- but for a different reason.

"Dean, the world depends on you to save them from a horrible fate. If you won't do it for the world, do it for me." Dean stopped his mental confrontation and just stood staring at Castiel, noticing now what emotion he was feeling, perhaps Cas didn't even know what was happening to himself, but there was a possibility Jimmy knew.

"No, I already made up my mind." Dean's stubbornness was entering into the conversation, and Castiel only grew more frustrated and determined, and even if he wasn't aware, more turned on by Dean's attitude. Castiel stood up from the bed and walked towards Dean. Castiel spoke up once again.

"Perhaps if I showed you the remains of your brother you will change your mind." Castiel touched Dean's shoulder before he had a chance to protest. In a split second the scenery had changed from a motel bedroom to an old abandoned town, where everything was destroyed. Dean looked around, noticing the scorched trees, buildings still aflamed, until he looked over at his brother lying on the ground. He ran over and cradled his brother's head in his lap.

"Sammy," Dean held back more tears that were welling up. "Dad told me I had to protect you and I broke his promise. Sam, you've always been a great lil' brother to me and I'm sorry I never said it 'til now, but I guess I gotta say it before I die too." By the end of the speech Dean's eyes had let the tears fall, his memories replaying all the times he and Sam were hunting monsters and even the arguments they had together.

Castiel stood behind him, now watching as tears fell him Dean's eyes. The feeling in his chest now growing stronger as he watched Dean being the older brother he should have been years before instead of hiding it away inside. Castiel keeled down beside Dean, putting his hand on Dean's shoulder.

"Bring back Sam, please, Cas. Bring him back, for me." Dean sniffled, holding back the tears that threatened to fall. Castiel turned to look at Dean's face but his eyes were cast upon his little brother's face. Castiel looked down at the younger Winchester, seeing not the attraction he saw in the older Wincester, even though they were brother.

"I'm sorry, Dean, but I cannot." Castiel felt hurt when the next few words came pouring out of Dean.

"What kind of angel are you? All you've done is caused more problems than you can fix -- Sammy is now dead because you can't protect the world, and where is God in all this? Where is the Oh so mighty God in all this, huh? He hasn't laid a finger down to help since the apocalypse started, all any of you angels -- and God -- have done is send us on some wild goose chase around the world. All because you have some ridiculous lead that didn't lead anywhere, and most of it was in riddles." Dean stood back up and walked away from Cas, before turning back around.

"You know what? I am done with all this, I am going to say goodbye to everything about this apocalypse right now." Dean turned back around and walked away. Castiel stood up and walked after Dean.

"You've got nowhere to go, Dean, and who are you going home to? Where is home, Dean?" Dean turned back around and swung his fist back, sending his fist flying into Cas' face. Castiel's connection with Dean had told him to prepare for the attack, but still his heart lurched in his chest.

"You sure know how to stoop low, even for an angel." Dean's face was stained with earlier tears but now anger had replaced the tears. "I ought to teach you not to mess with me, but I'm too tired right now. Just... send me back to the hotel." Dean's anger wore away as soon as it had appeared, replaced with tired eyes and weariness. He didn't even care that the constant poofing around the world would affect his bowel movement for the next few days.

Castiel obliged to Dean's request, sending him back to the hotel. He noticed as days changed, Dean was sleeping more every chance he could. The battle between Heaven and Hell and worn him out more than his stubbornness would allow him to admit. As soon as Dean's head had hit the pillow once they arrived back, he had already fallen asleep worn out from all the crying. Castiel sat down in the chair, waiting until Dean awoke.

While he sat there, he watched Dean peacefully sleep, no worries of the apocalypse, no pursuing his right as Michael's vessel. Castiel decided to enter Dean's dreams, to spectate how wonderful and peaceful it was. He reappeared in a closet, assuring himself this would be the best place that Dean wouldn't find out he was here. He peeked open the door and sat down, situating his face in front of the crack he peered out with one eye looking into a bedroom, the next thing he noticed was the sound. He heard moaning. That's when he noticed to figures on the bed, he blushed bright red when realisation dawned upon him.

He sat back in the closet, closed the door in a hurry and poofed from Dean's dream, sitting back in the chair. Dean stirred in the bed not long after, opening his eyes. He turned over and looked at Cas, speaking what was on his mind.

"What the hell, Cas? What were you doing in my dreams? I thought I told you to be more careful next time!" Dean sat up, furious with Castiel.

"What were you doing... having... having sex with me? And creating a dream version of me. What was that about?" Dean was stumped, the last few days he had been having inappropriate thoughts about an angel, that was a guarantee full-paid ride to hell with no refund.

"Let's just forget about it, man. It was a one-time thing. A mistake." Dean may have shrugged it off but the two of them had both felt the tug at their hearts when Dean said those words aloud. Dean sat at the edge of the bed, head down, hands at either side of him gripping the edge of the side of the bed.

"Alright, I'm ready to face the end of the world, whether I die or not." Castiel whipped his head in Dean's direction, eyes pooped out. Each moment he spent with the Winchester's the more human he was becoming. Dean only wanted to face the world now to stop himself from saying something he would regret, or maybe it was the perfect moment for him to say something he would regret. Castiel stood forward and poofed them off to where the world was possibly going to end or be restored to its former self -- safe and sound.

Dean and Castiel stood side-by-side as they watched every demon they knew destroy the world piece by piece. Dean stepped forward and called for the arch-angel Michael to step forward and face him. A man in the distance turned around and walked towards Dean and Castiel. He finally stopped ten yards in front of them.

"So you finally made you're decision have you?" Michael's voice was hidden deep within the tone of each word that was spoken. Dean spoke up, becoming more unafraid as he remembered his family.

"Yeah. And you're not going to possess my body. I'm doing this fight alone." Castiel turned to look at Dean, admiration appearing in his crystal-blue eyes. Castiel spoke up this time.

"Dean, you can't do this fight alone, think about Sam. He died thinking the same thing." Castiel's gruff voice alerted Dean, but his mind was still set. Dean was growing more annoyed by the way Castiel was talking, putting him down.

"Shut up, Cas. You don't know how tired I am. I am sick of fighting for a cause that is not going to end. There are plenty more hunters out there." Dean turned back to Castiel, ignoring Michael as he watched angel and human interact with each more, a smirk plain on his face. "Where's Lucifer, Cas?"

Castiel pointed of into the distance, Dean followed Cas' eyes and they landed where the biggest fight was going down. Dean took one step forward and continued walking, stopping only once he had reached his destination. Castiel stood only a few feet away, ready to aid Dean whenever necessary.

"Well if it isn't the older Winchester this time. Come to start what your brother couldn't? Shame, I had high hope for him." Lucifer turned around laughing. Dean clenched his fist, ready to throw a punch into this monsters face. "And Castiel, nice to see you again. How is father?" Lucifer smirked seeing the aggravation in both their faces.

"Shut up, and get ready to fight!" Dean yelled, Castiel stood behind him feeling the anger.

Lucifer clicked his tongue. "I am very disappointed in you, Dean. I thought you would have more sense than your little brother, rushing into a fight like this. You are much more rational than your brother these days. He couldn't even think straight with all that demon blood in his system. You were always the normal one." Dean interrupted.

"Shut up! You don't know shit about my family. Now get ready to fight." Lucifer laughed.

"Aw, have I hit a nerve? That's the thing with you hunters always so close to family, it's easy to break you all up." Dean grew more irritated, throwing the first punch. Lucifer grew annoyed, even though he felt no pain he was agitated that their conversation was cut short.

"We were having such a lovely conversation, why's you have to go and do such a thing like that?" Lucifer clicked his tongue again, Dean felt like a child being yelled at for all the wrong doings but he ignored that feeling and charged at Lucifer again with the knife Ruby had left behind. Once the knife sunk into Lucifer's chest, he chucked.

"You think a mere knife will stop me in my tracks?" Lucifer chuckled pulling out the knife, showing Dean that it made no effect. Dean staggered back, shocked the knife had not worked. Castiel stood in watch, knowing their last hope had ended. This fight was as good as done.

"So sorry, Dean, we had such a lovely chat but since you were hellbent on a fight, you're going to die now!" Lucifer said aloud, every monster in the near vicinity now turned their heads to watch the fight. Lucifer raised his hands, a red flashing light appeared and all Dean could register was lying on the floor, feeling blood seeping from his mouth and the laughter echoing around him, resonating in his head. He whispered out for Cas to appear beside him.

"Cas," He coughed up blood. "Cas." Castiel reappeared beside Dean, lifting his head off the ground slightly.

"I'm sorry I failed you," Dean's eyes started to droop shut, "But know that... that... I always loved you." Dean coughed up more blood, his eyes closing. Castiel leaned down and kissed Dean promptly on the lips.

"I know -- I've always loved you, too." Castiel stood back up after placing Dean's head gently on the ground, turning back to Lucifer and raised his hand. As soon as he did, a flash of white engulfed the whole area, everything in the area dropped dead -- including himself. Hoping he would be reunited with Dean in Heaven.