They'll Never Take My Heart

White. Everything was white, and smiling. Creepy, really. It was like an insane asylum, minus the fun. This was the land of the BL/ind* testing labs. I was taken. My family was gone, a distant memory, and I was trapped here. It started such a long time ago… around 6 years, I think. These strange people in white coats wearing horrible masks came, and they had guns that shot lasers. There was no blood, no evidence, just a scared little seven year old me, cowering as an Asian lady approached, smiling, speaking comforting words. So I went willingly. It was one of the worst decisions of my life. They brought me to their headquarters. There were other kids, too. We were to test their ‘medicine’ before they gave it to the general public, to make the world a happy, smiling place. I didn’t like it much, the men with the masks would be patrolling often. The Asian lady would come around too sometimes, to see how we were doing. Some people reacted badly in the beginning. Screaming about invisible monsters, and sounds no one else could hear. They got taken away and replaced in less than a week. I was a lucky one, I guess. I never had too bad of a reaction, I just took my pills like a good little captive, ending up in a paradise-like place, created by my own imagination. But when word of a rebellion got around, my imagination was shut down. There was no more paradise, just what BL/ind* wanted us to see. I had few friends, because most of my free time was spent trying to keep my own mind. I started seeing the smiles fading. Free thinking was prohibited, and our uniform was changed to a white coat and pants. No color was allowed whatsoever. Groups of people would be dragged in from time to time, the Killjoys. The rebels. I liked them, they were colorful, independent, and free. Well, until they got caught. Most who went in didn’t come back out. But then came the day BL/ind* was blown up. The most exciting thing to happen to me in 6 years. The masked people were ushering the lab rats into cars, most likely to move to another base. No one was smiling then. But it was the happiest I’d been in a while. A flying piece of wood scratched my hand, and then I was snapped out of it. Blood. Red. Color. Emotion. They tried to brainwash us, but the sudden shock of color (not to mention the stinging…) brought me back to where I was supposed to be. So after trying to stop the bleeding using my sleeve and pressure, I hid under wall fragments until everyone was gone, and ran. I was finally free. Free to do whatever I wanted, Free to feel whatever I wanted, Free to BE whatever I wanted.
It wasn’t long before I came to an abandoned diner. The N and R had fallen off though, so it spelled DI E. I could care less. I’d been stuck in a brainwashing facility for six years, in the middle of California, far from any part of my life before it.
‘I haven’t seen the outside world since 2013….’ I thought as I surveyed my other surroundings. It was a desert.
‘So this is what California looks like…’ I pushed my hair away from the base of my neck. ‘I haven’t had much of a haircut in six years either…’ I mused, watching it flop down back to my thighs. Pushing open the door, I did not expect to be smacked over the head with a- ray gun…? It knocked me out for a bit, I guess, because when I woke up, little dancing spots crossed in and out of my vision. I was tied to a chair in the middle of the diner. People were staring at me. So I stared back.

“Now who the f**k are you?” he had an afro. I’d never met a person with a real afro. “Your hair is funny.” I stated bluntly, earning a smack to the back of the head.

“Just answer the question. Who, the f**k, are you?” Red hair. Green-ish eyes “I’m me.” Another strike.

“Name?” Red hair asked.

“Why are you hitting me?” I asked, cringing when I felt the gun being put to the back of my head. “I have a name, I think. I just haven’t used it in a while. I’m number 1370492 though, if it helps at all.” I explained.

“What were you doing out in the middle of California, running like a madman?” Blonde hair. Light brown eyes. He was the one holding the gun. It was red. I like the color red.

“I might be mad, but I’m not a man. They brought me here to California. Stuck me in the testing facility.”
I said, shrugging, or at least attempting to.

“Why did they bring you to the testing facility, 1370492?” Blonde again.

“They took away my family. The lady seemed so nice, she was smiling, I was scared, and I just willingly
went with them. I was 7 years old. It was the day after my birthday.”

“See! She’s part of BL/ind*!” Another voice. How many were there? I think there were four… Long black hair.

“She’s also just a kid.” Red hair said calmly.

“You’re Killjoys, aren’t you?” I asked. “You’re colorful. And you don’t have the tattoos.” I said, smiling sadly. They weren’t taken too.

“Tattoos?” Black hair.

“Yeah, when we got there, they told me they had to give me a number so that I could be happy forever.” So many questions about me… I wasn’t used to this kind of attention, regardless of the fact it was interrogation.

“But who are you?”

“We’re killjoys, like you said. And you’re very lucky, 1307429, beca-“

“1370492.”

“What?”

“1370492. Not 1307429.”

“Oh, sorry. Well, you’re very lucky, you know why?”

“I have a feeling you’re going to tell me, funny haired man.”

“Wha-? Smart, for a kid. But you’re no match for the original Killjoys. We’re the real deal, Sunshine.”

“Why am I Sunshine?” I asked. “And why am I still tied up? It’s very rude of you, you know.” I spat,
reaching my head forward to start gnawing through the ropes. My teeth were sharp, I thought maybe it
would work.

“Great, we get another nutter.” Black hair said.

“Like you can talk, Fun.” Fun? Well, I can’t really talk either, seeing as how I’m just numbers…

“Ok, 1370492, do you mind if I call you 1-3?” Red asked.

“Go right ahead” I said, nodding slightly

“Ok, 1-3, I’m going to cut you loose. You’re going to put your arms above your head, and you won’t make any sudden movements, ok?”

“What am I going to do? I have no weapon, and I’ve been sitting doing nothing but popping pills since I was seven. There’s nothing I can do against you, oh great wise and powerful killjoy master.” I said sarcastically, following orders. Hands clapped against my ribs, then up and down my sides. Honestly? They’re searching me for weapons? Didn’t I just say that I’m unarmed? I slowly reached for my sleeve. I wanted to see if my hand was still bleeding. Afro tackled me and pinned my arms down before I could though. My head was hit for the second time that day, but this was slight compared to being clocked over the head with a gun, regardless of the fact that it was red, and I like red.

“What… the hell… was that for?” I asked as I tried to use my legs to kick him off. “I wasn’t reaching… for a weapon, you… idiot.”

“Hey!” Afro exclaimed

“Oh can it… I was checking… to see…. If I was still bleeding. Looks… like… you’re covered… in red, Afro...” I laughed as he freaked out, the hand that was once holding my own (still bleeding, apparently) covered in blood. It was fun to watch someone flip. No one showed emotion in BL/ind* other than smiling.

“I don’t see why you’re reacting so much,” I stated nonchalantly, licking my hand. Metallic tang… so this is what blood tastes like? No one ever bled in the BL/ind* labs… “It’s just blood. If you guys are anything like the guys I’ve seen the masked men bring in, you should be more familiar with it than anyone should be.” I explained, licking off some more. It was… not bad. But they were staring even more.

“Hey Dr. D! We’ve got a situation!” Blonde called. From behind the counter, in the kitchen area, I guess, of the diner came a man with long black hair, a mustache, and a radio.

“Who are you?” I asked. They were still staring. I guess staying so long without really having human contact made me a bit… odd.

“The name’s Dr. Death Defying, Sunshine. What’s your title?”

“1370492. Are you a real doctor?” I asked, holding out my hand to him, the red liquid still flowing ever so slowly off the sides and dripping down onto the floor.

“I am, so let’s get you bandaged up.” He went back into the room and pulled out a first aid kit of sorts. After taking a bit of my blood (“For safety reasons, Sunshine) he bandaged my hand tightly, and helped Afro clean off his hand. I leaned against the wall and turned to look at the killjoys.

“Can I go home now?”

“Home doesn’t exist anymore, kid. BL/ind* took over.”

“That’s something I don’t understand, Red. My identity is 1370492. Not kid, not Sunshine, not even 1-3.”

“Well how about we give you a new identity?” ‘Fun’ suggested.

“I don’t even know who you are. Answer my damn questions!” I exclaimed. Something felt very wrong.

“Take it easy, you’re gonna be fine”

“She’s going through withdrawal.” Dr. Death Defying stated simply.

“Withdrawal of what? The pills? Do you have any?” What was wrong with me? I hated those things, they made me go to a beach. I hate beaches. “Give them to me. Please, I just need one. Just one. That’s all I need.” My voice was becoming strained. Was I really that dependent on them?

“I don’t have any, but I need you to hold on, ok?”

“I don’t feel good…” I groaned, sliding down the wall and onto the floor. This was bad. This was very bad. “Make the blood come back. I want the red. Make the red come back.” I muttered. It snapped me out of it the first time, maybe it would work again?

“You’ve bled enough, I can’t make the red come back.” Dr. Death Defying said slowly. Great. He thought I was crazy. Well… I kind of am, but that’s beside the point,

“Color. My color. I need my color back. It snapped me out of it the first time. I want it back. Give me back my color.” I mumbled, grabbing for Red’s ray gun. I needed to know I wasn’t gone. ‘Fun’ grabbed my arms before I could get at it though. Red pointed to himself.

“Party Poison. This is Fun Ghoul, Jet Star, and Kobra Kid. See? Question answered. We’re gonna get you back.” He said, shoving a can of something in my face. It was silver, I think. Like a shiny gray white… It smelled funny. My head felt a little clearer after that.

“It’s kinda gross at first, but it’s all we’ve got. Eat up, 1370492.” Staring at it for a bit, I swirled my finger in the contents. Shrugging, I tried it. Then tried some more. It was pretty ok.”

“Can we keep her?” Kobra Kid asked. Aww, I feel loved, in a demented kind of way…

“We’re running out of cot space in the back, but I don’t see why we can’t fit one more…” Party Poison mused.
‘So he’s the leader of this group…’ I thought.

“I’m not calling her 13495806 or whatever. I’m telling you that right now.” Fun Ghoul said.

“I’m 1370492 damn it!” I exclaimed.

“I’m not calling you that. Pick something else, or you’re stuck being Sunshine.”

“Don’t be mean, Fun. She’s just a kid. More importantly, since Kobra decided to drag her down with us, she’s OUR kid.” Jet said.

“I’m not Sunshine. But I’m not 1370492 either. My name was Becca. But not anymore. I didn’t know if I could trust you guys yet, so I didn’t say. But I need something new.” I said, finishing off my can of Power Pup, putting it on the diner counter.

“Well, no-name, you smell like a Draculoid. If you’re staying with us, I’m going to have to ask you to please wash the stink off.” Party Poison said, pushing me in the direction of a girl’s bathroom.

“Like you can talk, Poison. You smell like a dead skunk…” I replied, ducking the arm aiming to choke me. “Missed me!” I called, laughing, until he swung again, and put me in a full nelson. I may not know a lot, but what I DO remember from my childhood was watching my sister in her martial arts class. There was a way to get out of this…

“Take it back, punk!” Red shouted, pulling my feet off the floor

“Make me!” I said, kicking him in the shin. Were they okay people? Sure. But NO ONE puts me in a full nelson without me fighting back.

“Fun! Backup please?!”