This Masterpiece Will Fall Apart

After we played the first few songs in our set, we had to tell everyone what happened. As soon as I got on stage, I could see people were confused about Jason being there, and not Airin. “So, you're probably wondering why Airin isn't here...” I paused, taking a sip of water. “Well, Airin is in the hospital right now,” people gasped. “He is probably in, or just out of surgery now. So let's all send him well-wishes and hope that he gets better very soon.” I turned away for a quick second to look at the set list. It was a song that Airin sang. “Alright, so, you're also probably wondering who is going to sing Airin's songs? I can't because the key is a little weird for my voice. Well, you'll find out soon enough who is going to sing.” I winked at the crowd and nodded to Zack. John, who was acting as our tech since Jason was playing, handed me my guitar. Zack started playing a simple riff, and then he started singing.

Open your eyes now
take me away to a brighter place
to counteract the state I'm in
I'm just waiting for my chance
to win again

This is what a heart attack looks like
But hold me in your memory for now
But know you kill me
at least I'll fall asleep tonight

Zack even managed a slight scream, which I was highly impressed with. I was very glad Zack decided to step up and sing. When the song ended, everyone burst into near deafening applause. “That's how you fucking do it Angelo!” Marque excitedly exclaimed. Zack had a huge smile on his face.

“How's that for a surprise, huh?” I asked.

“It even surprised me!” Zack laughed. Zack looked very jumpy now.

“How you feeling there Zack?” I asked, tuning my guitar down half a step.

“I feel good! I feel pumped! I want to do that again! I kind of want to kiss someone right now,” Zack said. He looked over at Keith and wiggled his eyebrows at him. Keith looked up from his guitar and looked at Zack.

“No...no, I'm okay right now. Maybe later,” Keith said. Zack frowned and turned to me with a childish smile on his face.

“Yeah, okay, why not,” I shrugged and gave Zack a quick peck. There was mixed reactions from the crowd. “Hey, we're all family here!”

“Yeah! I'm the annoying brother no one talked about for years!” Zack said, putting his hands on his hips.

“Just so you know, that's not going to happen every time you sing,” I said.

“Damn it!” Zack stomped his foot, causing me to laugh. “But what if I'm a good boy for the whole day?”

“Not even then Angelo. Not even then,” I smiled at Zack, who smiled back.

We only hung around a little while after the show before we went to see Airin. He was staring at a wall when we walked in. I could see a white dressing bandage on his neck. Marque rushed over to him and started asking him questions, barely letting Airin answer. Keith walked up to him and put his hand on Marque's shoulder. “Marque, you need to take pauses in your sentences,” Marque sheepishly bowed his head. “So, how are you?” Keith asked once the rest of us joined. Jason started looking for chairs for everyone.

“I'm fine,” Airin said. His voice was gravely and coarse. “It feels like I'm swallowing razor blades every time I talk though.”

“What did they exactly do?” I asked.

“They cut me open, dug around for a little while, and sewed me back up,” Airin said. Marque clasped both his hands together out of pure nervousness.

“No, what did they...they do?” Marque asked.

“They only removed part of my larynx,” Airin said. I gasped, clapping my hand over my mouth.

“Only? That's still some pretty serious shit!” Zack said.

“Are you going to be able to continue with the tour?” Jason asked nervously. Airin looked away from us. I could tell he was choked up about something.

“You can't, can you?” I bit my lip. Marque took Airin's hand in his, rubbing his thumb across Airin's knuckles.

“The doctor said it wouldn't be wise for me to go on, especially since I use my voice a lot,” Airin explained.

“We can't do this tour with out you,” Zack said. Airin looked at him.

“You can't cancel,” Airin protested.

“It wouldn't be fair,” Marque added.

“To the fans,” Airin replied. “We cancelled a tour 5 years ago. We can't do it again.”

“But it wouldn't be right without you,” I said.

“Look, you have Jason to fill in for drums. From what my twitter told me, Zack was amazing tonight,” Airin said, waving his phone at all of us. “I mean, he's a trending topic right now.”

“I am?” Zack said, pulling out his phone to check. I rolled my eyes at him.

“I am not going to let you cancel because of me. Shit happens guys, and we would disappoint so many people,” Airin said.

“But, honey, it's just...not the same without you,” Marque said.

“Look, Airin is obviously going to be stubborn about this, and wont give up,” I said. “We have people to fill in, and Zack was amazing tonight, and Jason is a drummer and knows all of our songs by heart. He should, he's been with us for so many years now.”

“And Airin needs his time to heal. He can't get right back into things. Yes, it wont be the same without him, but we really shouldn't cancel. Maybe a show or two, but not the whole tour. The last time we cancelled a tour, we didn't get back on the road for 4 years. Keith and I are already in our thirties, and no offence,” Jason motioned to Keith, “but we can't do this for that long. Almost all of us will be in our thirties in 4 years, except for Marque and Zack. Can we really risk that?” Jason made a good point. We were getting older, and almost all of us had families that we needed to look after. I wasn't even sure if touring is what I wanted to be doing when I was 30.

“Alright. Let's just finish the tour then,” Marque said. We became silent. Everyone was obviously going over what was going to change for the next month.

Zack was the first to speak, “Well, I'm going to go talk to that cute nursing student I saw at the reception desk earlier,” Zack got up from his chair, shoving his phone in his pocket.

“What's you're pick-up line? 'Hey, I'm a trending topic on twitter'?” Airin cheekily said. Zack mulled it over for a while.

“Actually, that could work. She looks like a girl that uses twitter,” Zack nodded and walked out of the room. Airin rolled his eyes at him. How people could keep a sense of humour in difficult times amazed me.