This Masterpiece Will Fall Apart

The tour really had been going well. Airin had been sent home after we were in Winnipeg, because the doctors worried about him getting sick again without proper care. He would call and update us every day. Marque was absolutely on edge until Airin did call us. We told Marque he could have gone with Airin, but he said it was fine, and Airin could look after himself.

I was hanging out in my hotel room the day after the Toronto show. It was about 11:30 at night, and I was just reading a book. Everyone else had gone out for a few hours, but I didn't feel up to it (I was feeling nauseated). My phone started ringing, “Hello?” I answered.

“Josline? I'm having a bit of a problem,” Josh said. I put my book down.

“Josh, is everything alright? Is Finley hurt?” I became worried.

“No, no. Everything is fine,” Josh said, which alleviated the worry a little. “Finely wont go to sleep.”

“Did you try to sing to him?” I asked.

“He wont let me. I told him I'd sing the song you sing, but he nearly screamed at me,” Josh said. I could hear the sleepiness in his voice. “He wants you to sing to him.”

“Put it on speakerphone,” I said. I heard Josh fumble around a little and then set the phone down on something. I heard Finley babbling about something and Josh speak to him, but then it was quiet, which I figured was my cue to sing. “The sun has gone down, now time to sleep. Tomorrow waits for a bright smile. You wont have to walk the streets alone, so rest now.” I stopped when I heard Finley's light breathing next to the phone. I waited a few minutes while Josh moved around and I heard the click of Finley's bedroom door.

“You are such a life saver,” Josh told me. I smiled. “I think when you come home we need to record that whole song for him.”

“I'm surprised we haven't actually done this yet,” I said to Josh.

“We're just not on the ball with that,” Josh sighed. “So, guess what our son keeps calling me.”

“Is he calling you “ick” again?” I asked.

“No, he's not calling me that anymore. He keeps calling me by my first name,” Josh said.

“He keeps calling you Josh?” I repeated.

“Yes, he wont call me dad anymore. I don't know what I did!” Josh heavily sighed.

“You probably didn't do anything. It's most likely a phase of his,” I explained.

“He needs to stop having those. There's too many to keep up with,” Josh said.

“He's a child Josh! He's going to have those for a while,” I said.

“Well, he needs to have less of them. This old man can't keep up with them,” Josh said.

“You sound absolutely exhausted right now. Rough day?” I asked, laying back down on the bed.

“Extremely. I think I have a new found appreciation for all mothers,” Josh said.

“Why is that?”

“Because Finley was having an all-day tantrum, and I couldn't get a hold of you, and I was near tears at one point because I didn't know what to do!” Josh explained. I don't know why that was actually cute to me. “Now I really know how much you go through in a day with him.”

“Oh...sweetheart,” I couldn't help but giggle at him.

“It's not funny!” Josh whined.

“Did you ask anyone for help? Like El? Or your MOTHER?” I asked him.

“No, I didn't think of doing that, because I was more concerned about our screaming child wanting to hit me,” Josh said. I shook my head. “Can you come home soon? Because I don't know if can handle anymore of these tantrums of his.”

“You should get used to Finley's tantrums, because there's going to be two screaming children in the house soon, remember?” Josh was silent.

“Shit, right,” Josh said.

“But, just wait until the teenage years,” I said.

“I don't want the teenage years to happen. Can Finley stay 5?” Josh asked me.

“Would you rather have 5 year old Finley screaming at you, or 15 year old Finley resenting you for everything you've ever done for him?” I asked him. Josh was silent again.

“I can't win!” Josh exclaimed. “Do you think that...Finley's going to resent me when he's older?”

“No, of course not! Finley loves you. He's just being a little hellion right now,” I said.

“He'll drive me to drink, that's what he'll do!” Josh said.

“Now, now. He's not that much of a hellion,” I said.

“He's getting pretty close,” Josh yawned at me.

“You should go to bed,” I told him.

“Yeah, probably. But knowing me, I'm going to be up until 2,” Josh said. Just then, Zack walked in, holding 2 paper cups in his hands, he handed one to me.

“At least try to get some sleep tonight, please? If Finley starts to get too much again, just ship him over to Airins for a little while to see Duncan,” I told him.

“I'll ship him off alright. Right to Timbuktu,” Josh mumbled.

“Joshua Ramsay! You will do no such thing!” I exclaimed.

“What does Josh want to do?” Zack asked, plopping down on his bed.

“He wants to send Finley to Timbuktu,” I told Zack. Zack laughed and shook his head. Josh and I said goodbye to each other and I tossed my phone at the end of my bed.

“So, why does Josh want to send Finley to Africa?” Zack asked.

“Because he's being difficult. Apparently he had a day-long tantrum,” I said.

“Who? Josh, or Finley?” Zack asked me. I slapped my hand to my forehead.

“Finley! Although, I'm pretty sure Josh would have had one too,” I said. Zack snickered, taking a sip from his cup.

“Do you think he's going to be able to handle two kids now?”

“Probably not. He's most likely going to have breakdowns every few days once the new one arrives,” I said.

“Imagine if you had triplets or something,” Zack said. I shot him a dirty look.

“Don't you fucking say that ever again. If we can barely handle one, we're not going to be able to handle 4. If there EVER is 4 Ramsay children, be prepared to have at least 3 of them over at your house every day,” I said. Zack laughed at me.

“I was just saying! There's no need to be rude!” Zack said. “Besides, your child is pretty much over at my house every day anyways.”

“But your mom loves it!”

“I know she does, but I think she loves Finley more than her own grandchildren,” Zack shook his head and got off the bed so he could have a shower. I smiled at him and went back to my book, but all I could keep my mind on was the triplet comment Zack made.