This Masterpiece Will Fall Apart

Having twins was a lot more work than what I thought it would be. I knew that it would be a lot of work, but I didn't expect the amount it was. I was super glad that my parents stuck around for a few weeks so Josh and I could get used to the fact that we now had three kids. Finley also loved the twins. When Eloisa brought him to the hospital, he was very gentle and curious. When my parents left about 3 weeks after the twins were born, that's when we really started feeling stressed out. I nearly forgot what it was like to get up every two hours to feed or change a baby.

I had just started to fall asleep around 3:30, but I was startled awake when I heard one of the twins cry. I rolled over onto my back and groaned. When I started to get out of the bed, Josh put his hand on my shoulder. “I'll go check on them.” he said. “You get some sleep.” I looked at him through tired eyes, and didn't argue with him. When Josh was almost out of the room, I sat up again.

“Wait, what if they're hungry?” I said. Josh thought for a moment.

“I'll just come back and get your boobs.” he said.

“Yes, because I can really detach them, as much as I'd like to sometimes.” I said. Josh laughed and walked out of the room, and I layed back down. I closed my eyes for what seemed like mere seconds, but when I opened my eyes next, it was 5:45. I looked around and noticed that Josh wasn't in the room. I threw the covers off of me and walked down the hallway to the twins room. I peeked into the room, and Josh was fast asleep, snoring obnoxiously (how he didn't wake up Autumn and Kodiak was beyond me), in the chair dad and Josh had fought with to get into the room, and he also had one of the twins in his arms. I smiled and shook my head at him. I quietly stepped into the room and pushed gently on Joshes shoulder. He kind of sputtered before opening his eyes. He looked around, a little confused, then looked down at his arms.

“What time is it?” he asked quietly.

“It's almost six.” I said, taking Autumn from him and putting her back in her crib. I went over and checked on Kodiak quickly. I was highly terrified of finding one of my kids not breathing. Since my sister had passed away from SIDS, I didn't want it to happen to my children. I stood back up and Josh got out of the chair. We quietly crept out of the room and shut the door behind us. When we didn't hear any noises, we both heaved a sigh of relief.

“Do you think we can get a few minutes of sleep now?” Josh asked.

“Probably not. Finley has to get up in an hour anyways for school.” I said. “I can't, and don't want to believe, he's in grade one already.” Josh put an arm around me and walked me over to the couch in the living room. We both sat down and I curled up next to him. “What happened to the wee little gaffer that we had?” I asked. Josh kind of chuckled.

“Well, hey, look at it this way, now we have two more of them.” Josh said.

“I don't know if that's comforting or not.” I said. Josh chuckled again. We were both quiet. Josh kept his arm around me, and I stayed leaning against his chest. I finally made some kind of noise, a chuckle.

“What?” Josh asked.

“This is probably one of the last few times we'll get to do this for a while.” I said. “Just get to spend down time with each other, I mean.”

“Well, I'm glad I get to spend this small amount of time with you anyways.” Josh said. “I don't think I could be any happier right now.” I looked up at Josh, my head tilted slightly.

“What do you mean?” I asked, my tiredness confusing me.

“I mean, I have a beautiful family, that I never thought I'd have, an amazing band, a good career, fantastic friends,” Josh paused and looked down at me. “and the most wonderful, loving woman on the planet as my fiance.” he said, kissing the tip of my nose, and I proceeded to scrunch my face. I hated it when he did that. “So, for that, I'd like to thank you.”

“Thank me? For what? Having sex with you when no one else would?” I smirked at him, and Josh frowned.

“You ruin everything.” Josh sighed.

“Yet, you decided to marry me.” I said. Josh smiled.

“I couldn't of made a more perfect choice.” Josh said.

Finley came bounding out of his room about an hour later. I did not understand how a child that small could store up that much energy, and I very badly wanted to bottle it up. I got Finley ready for school while Josh dealt with the twins. Josh said that he would take Finley to school, which left me with Autumn and Kodiak. Autumn was being extremely fussy, which is why I think Josh left me with the twins, and Kodiak was just kind of taking everything in stride. He was a very calm baby, and it confused me ever so slightly. Even though they were only a few weeks old, they already had very dominant traits. Kodiak was extremely and eerily calm for a baby. Autumn was vocal and demanding, just like the doctor said.

Josh finally came back from dropping Finley off, and he had the silliest grin on his face. I was currently holding Kodiak, Autumn was in her carrier on the floor. “What's up with you?” I asked, cocking an eyebrow at him. Josh came over to me and took Kodiak so he could hold him. Autumn started getting fussy again, so I had to pick her up.

“Well, apparently, Finley has been telling this story of how there's two very small monsters living in the house now.” Josh explained. I snorted and slapped a hand against my forehead. “His teacher asked me what Finley meant, because he took me outside to talk with me, and he seemed kind of worried, but not really. I just had to tell me, 'Oh, my fiance and I had twins about a month ago'. The look on this man's face was priceless.”

“Only our son would do something like that.” I said.

“Well, any child of yours is bound to do something like that.” Josh said.

“Why is it any child of mine? Why can't it be yours for once?” I asked.

“They're only mine when they're sleeping.” Josh said and I snorted again, startling Autumn, who began to whine.

“Oh, you're okay,” I said to my daughter, holding her against my chest. “Your mum's just being an idiot.” Josh chuckled slightly.

“I think this one's getting a little hungry.” Josh said, looking at Kodiak. “We still have formula, right?”

“I...think so?” I questioned myself. I couldn't remember if I had to go shopping for it or not.

“Well, if we don't, I'm going to need your boobs.” Josh winked at me and walked into the kitchen. I rolled my eyes at him and smiled. I leaned back against the couch with Autumn still resting against my chest. She was breathing lightly, and appeared to of fallen asleep.

“I wish I could do that,” I thought to myself. I looked down at my daughter and smiled. It was honestly the most calming thing ever to me. Knowing that my children were happy and healthy was enough for me.