This Masterpiece Will Fall Apart

“So, what did you guys think of Surviving Nightlife?” I asked when I was switching from piano to guitar. “They were pretty good huh?” there was a loud cheer. “I went to school with John. He's a pretty nice guy,” I said. No one had to know what had happened in the past between me and him. I was keeping it professional, not personal. Jason came out from backstage with my guitar. “I'm pretty excited about this Hearts and Lungs tour guys. I'm back to playing guitar again, we've got some special and surprise guests for everyone. Let's try to make this the best tour ever, okay?” I smiled at every one. I turned to Airin, who nodded at me. He started a simple beat so I could continue talking. “Since this is the Hearts and Lungs tour, why not play the song?” Zack came in with a riff, followed by the rest of the band. Hearts and Lungs was the song that Josh sang with us. It was definitely different from MT's sound. It had more of a hard-rock sound to it.

Close your mind, cross your fingers
try to shake this off (shake it off, shake it off)
We're finding out the hard way
this what you already know
Watch what you say, it's far too late
Every breath, every intake, drives me further away

Can you hide away once you find out?
Will your heart take much more, (much more?)
I can't pretend, but hold on tight, don't let go
Don't let your lungs give out from the burn

There was a small solo, and in that time Josh appeared on stage. The girls mostly went crazy.

Well damn this night, I can not sleep
I can't be your prince, but I feel like a saint
It's so hard to see
fire and flames to ashes and dust
I'm so tired of tyring to fight this
I don't know how your touch I'm missing

Can you hide away once you find out?
Will your heart take much more, (much more?)
I can't pretend, but hold on tight, don't let go
Don't let your lungs give out from the burn

I don't want to sleep anymore
my heart opens on impact
when my head works too hard
I'm capable of so much damage.
...so let's watch this burn

Zack soloed and then the song ended. The crowd burst out in applause. Josh gave me a quick hug before bowing and walking off the stage. “Give it up for Josh Ramsay!” Zack said into his microphone.

“Thank you guys so much for making this one of the best kick-off shows ever!” Airin said. “And thank you for everyone who bought the album. Our online store sold out of the album within a day!”

“We'll be around for a few hours, so come hang out, take pictures, whatever! But, if you want to get naked, we're going to have to set up an appointment with one of us,” Zack said. I doubled over in laughter while I was walking off stage. I stood back and shook my head at Zack, mouthing a “no” at him. “Okay, just with me. I don't have an ol' ball and chain I have to worry about.” Zack said goodbye and we all got off stage. After everyone had put down their instruments, we all exchanged one big high-five. Josh joined in with the individual high-fives.

“That was an awesome show!” Jason told us while he was going back on stage to clean up. Josh wrapped his arms around me from behind.

“Josh, let go. I'm all gross,” I said.

“Hasn't stopped me before,” Josh said. I smiled, but he soon let go of me. “I'm going to go get Finley from Matt's,” he said, kissing my sweaty forehead. I crinkled my nose, but still smiled.

“Alright. I'll see you later tonight,” I said. Josh smiled and said goodbye to everyone else. Airin tackled me in a hug. “Ah! What are you doing!” I exclaimed.

“I'm just so excited!” Airin said, jumping up and down, making me jump with him.

“Airin, let me go! Your ball sweat is transferring to my pants!” I whined at him. Airin let go of me and looked down at his pants.

“There are no visible stains there!” he said.

“You're wearing black pants! You can't see it anyways!” I said, waving my hands around in disgust. I started rubbing the side of my leg where Airin's legs had made contact. “Take it back!” I walked towards Airin and wiped my hands on his shirt sleeve.

“I don't want it!” Airin squealed. Zack, John, Curtis, and Damien were all staring at the two of us. We stopped and stared back.

“I really forgot that's how you two acted around each other,” John said, shaking his head, his dark brown locks falling in front of his face. It was weird seeing him with dark hair. John had blond hair while we were growing up. That was his original colour. I honestly didn't recognize them when I saw him.

“Well, get used to it again Baker,” Airin said. He nodded and turned on his heel, walking out to the front to greet his “adoring public” as he called the fans. Zack called them the minions, while Marque, Keith and I called our fans our Dolls (some people had special names though. Matt was Malibu Ken, just because). I soon joined my brother in greeting the “Dolls” and it was pure chaos for a few hours. It calmed down around 11:30, only a few people lingered to get autographs and pictures or t-shirts before the merch guys started packing up. I barely got a minute to talk to anyone aside from the fans until it died down a bit. I did talk to a really cool group of four 18 year-old girls though. They said that they drove from Whitehorse (Yukon) just to see us (it was a day long drive!). One of the girls, Samara, showed me a tattoo of hers that she got for her birthday. It said, in a neat handwriting, “Through pain and defeat, I've found my purpose to life”. It was a line from one of our songs that was on the first ED record (the song was called Windowsill. It was sold as a rarity on iTunes). It was the first fan-tattoo that I had seen. Then we started talking about my tattoo's and what they all meant. I had 9 tattoo's in total. The music note on my right forearm I got when I was 16, a star chain on the back of my neck, a rose duo on my right shoulder, the word “hope” on my inner right arm, an old fashioned ship wheel on the back of my left shoulder, an anchor on the back of my right shoulder, 04~12~06 on my left wrist (the date Finley was born), “Let It Be” on my left foot and a Steampunk owl on my upper-right thigh. I was the most tattooed out of everyone in the band. Keith didn't have any tattoo's. Airin had 5, Marque had one, and Zack had his tattoo print leg which had 4 designs on it. I told myself I was only going to have one or two tattoo's, but they are addicting. Once you get one, you want more.

I was cleaning loading things into the trailer outside after the girls had left. There were very few people walking around that were at the show. I was starting to feel a little sick so I sat down on the hitch between the trailer and the van. I spotted John a few feet away from me and waved. He waved back and jogged over to me. “Hey, I barely got to talk to you tonight,” John said, kneeling down in front of me.

“Yeah, it was pretty busy, huh?” I asked leaning over slightly. “Good job tonight,” I smiled.

“Thanks,” John smiled back.

“I had no idea that you could actually sing,” I said. John never sang in our high school band. He had a very nice voice. It had a very folk-rock vibe to it.

“I forgot how well you could actually sing,” John said, sounding a little surprised. “It's been so long since I've heard your voice live. It's gotten so much more powerful. Definitely has a raw sound to it.”

“Well, thank you John. I took some vocal lessons while we were on out little hiatus for a few years there,” I explained. John nodded.

“Well, I really enjoyed your set. The song you did with Josh, I loved it. It's probably my favourite song on the album,” John admitted.

“You actually listen to our music?” I said in mock-surprise.

“Yes. I actually listen to your music. I thought I should know what kind of sound I was going to be touring with. I listened to 'Cages' first, and I fell in love with it. So, naturally, I had to buy the other albums and listen to them.” John smiled. He turned his head when Adam called him, saying they had to get going. “Well, I'll see you bright and early.” John gave me his signature tilted-head, crooked smile and walked off. I smiled to myself.

Maybe the tour wouldn't be that bad after all.