Killing Me Slowly

Dean’s POV

I found Sam in Brit’s room and it really hurt seeing him like this…it hurt just seeing Brit like this. It hurt more than anything. I hated seeing her hooked up to all this crap. She didn’t deserve this. I forced myself to walk in and stand on the other side of her bed.

“Hey, Short Stuff” I sighed. “You listen here, now…you better not die on me because I need you to help me figure out Melissa. I have no idea how she thinks…what she thinks…and I just need you around to keep Sammy from being so gloomy all the time…plus, you’re not so bad when it’s just the two of us either” I said.

I watched Sam carefully as he just kept his eyes on Brit as if he was waiting for her to jump to her feet and yell “surprise”.

“I don’t understand something…couldn’t Mel just use magic to heal Brit and Bobby?” I wondered aloud.

“You two have gotten so distant she can’t even talk to you about the basics anymore, can she” Sam assumed.

“What do you mean?”

“If she were to try and heal either of them…and you know she would’ve tried it by now…then whatever injury they have would be inflicted on her. It’s how the whole witch thing works when it comes to her using the magic”

“Why?”

“She doesn’t know. It’s just how it is”

“So…not that I’m complaining, because I’m glad she hasn’t tried it, but why hasn’t she” He snapped his eyes up at me.

“Because she promised you no more suicide attempts…” He looked back at Brit. “If she were to try to heal Brit or Bobby right now, she would die for sure”

We didn’t say anything else after that. I walked out and headed toward Bobby…but Mel wasn’t there. I started to worry a little. But, then I raced to the stairs that led up to the roof and when I got there I looked around frantically…then calmed down when I saw her standing by the edge, leaning on her elbows, looking out to the sun as it was just about beginning to set.

“So much for no more suicide attempts huh. This one is pretty classy. Planning on going out in style?” I said as I approached her.

“Hmmm funny” she replied.

“Can I join you?” I asked as I got beside her.

“In what? Standing next to me or in my attempt?”

“Both”

“Yea, I guess so…doesn’t seem so silly now does it” I gave her a look and she giggled as she looked over at me. “I’m just kidding”

“Yea, whatever” She looked back at the sun. “Sam told me that you would be able to save Brit and Bobby…but he told me the consequence…”

She looked down. “Yea, I…”

“Thank you…for not doing it” I said and that made her look up at me.

“I know Brit and Bobby will make it on their own…but if they don’t…that would most likely break me…but if you had saved them by putting your own life on the line…that would tear me to shreds, Melissa”

I was putting my heart out there right now so if she isn’t listening or if she makes fun of me for this later, I will personally kick her ass. “I can’t live without you, Mel…you have to know this by now. Even if we fight…even if we go down separate paths for a while…I’ll always come back to you. I’ll always be there. And it’s kind of insulting to know that you don’t know this”

“Well…it’s nice to hear sometimes. I can never know with you”

“But, you should”

I put a hand on her cheek and then I kissed her. I’ll admit…I missed her lips on mine. I’ve missed just being this close to her. I needed her…and she needed me…which I have to say…was a really good feeling…to feel needed.

Bobby’s POV

We got the spell ready to call the reaper and I’ll admit…things were getting stranger by the second. Things were disappearing…like everything in my closet and my junk drawer. But, I couldn’t pay attention to it right now. Rufus said the spell and the reaper appeared in the trap I painted on the floor.

“Cute. Got to admit, first time anyone's pulled one on me while actually unconscious”

“Well, get comfy” I said.

“Not so fast”

“Yeah? Sorry. Other business”

“I'm trying to help you, Bobby. You're going to die. Think you can stop it by pinning me like a bug?”

“Well…”

“You've seen the dark coming – people disappearing, things going blank. Look around. Cell by cell that bullet's killing your brain” I noticed all the faces in my photographs looked like they were being faded or scratched out. “You're running out of places to hide. So, understand…this trap won't hold forever because this room won't hold because you are going to die”

“You think”

“Come with me. Be done. You've earned it. Or fight me. Stay here. And you know the drill”

“I don't know, Bobby. I mean, you really want to get stuck, turn into some ghost?” Rufus voiced.

“I know what I'm doing, Rufus”

“Yeah, yeah, you're thinking you can help those kids. But how many spirits you meet in their right mind? Some hunter's gonna cut you down”

“Whose side are you on?”

“Bobby…you've helped. You got handed a small, unremarkable life, and you did something with it. Most men like you die of liver disease, watching "Barney Miller" reruns. You've done enough. Believe me” the reaper said.

“I don't care”

“Why?”

“Because they're my kids” Then, I saw the kid version of me standing a few feet away. “All right. The only way out is through. So lead the way…nice seeing you again, old friend” I said to Rufus and he nodded. “Thanks for the chat” I said to the reaper and then followed…little me.

We were in an older version of my house…in the kitchen…and I saw it again. My mother was on her knees cleaning up the mess that was on the floor. “It's fine. It'll just take a second”

“You just gonna sit there? Get a broom or something” that man said and the boy rushed off. “You know why he's like that? Because you let him do whatever he wants” he said, getting to his feet.

“It's okay. See? I'm almost done. You just relax a-and have another drink”

I sighed, seeing what was coming next. I never understood why she stayed with him…but I guess I just never will.

“Don't tell me what to do”

“No. Wait. Wait” she pleaded but he struck her across the face.

The sight of him disgusts me…and the thought of him still disgusts me every day I think about him…which I don’t try to do often. I saw little me was watching.

“Why do you always provoke him?”

“Because he's a bad kid. That's why” he said, looking at me now.

“Well, that's a load of crap. Who the hell were you to say?” I spoke up, taking a step forward.

“I'm your father. And you show your father respect”

“The day he deserves it, you drunken bully. Punching women and kids. Is that what they call fatherhood in your day?”

“Oh, you deserved it. Believe me. You were nothing but ungrateful”

“I was a kid! Kids ain't supposed to be grateful! They're supposed to eat your food and break your heart, you selfish dick! You died, and I was still so afraid I'd turn into you I never even had kids of my own”

“Good. You break everything you touch”

“Uh-huh. Well, as fate would have it, I adopted two boys and two girls, and they grew up great. They grew up heroes. So you can go to hell!” I yelled at him.

“I'm sorry I said that. I'm sorry” my mother cried a little.

“Yeah, yeah, you say that every time”

“Please just stop”

“No! This time, you listen!”

“Stop it” a younger voice said and we all looked to see the younger me standing in the doorway, holding a rifle. He cocked it.

“You're kidding, right? You're not half enough man to use that thing. You leave the adults to sort this out and I will deal with you later”

“Bobby, just go. Do what he says. Just go” my mother said as that man grabbed her by the hair.

“No. Leave her alone” he said, pointing it at him. He turned to look at him, not letting her go…and then he shot him…right in the head. He fell to the ground, dead.

She shot to her feet in shock. “Bobby, what did you do? God is gonna punish you” she said to him.

So I walked over to him. “Hey…you did what you had to do. This is where you learn that... they pretty much never say thanks when you save 'em. Now go get a shovel. Bury the old man out behind the woodshed” I instructed and he obeyed.

“You got the only genetic case of bullet in the brain I've ever seen” The reaper said as he appeared again. But, then a bright light started to shine through the windows. “Not so fast, Singer”

But, I rushed toward the door and swung it open…this had to be my last chance…and I was going to take it.

My POV

Dean and I got back to Sam as he was heading to Bobby’s room…just as a few nurses were prepping Bobby. “Wait, wait, wait, wait. What's happening?” Sam asked the nurse from before.

“He's showing signs of responsiveness. We're taking him up for surgery. If you want to see him, I'd squeeze in there quick” she said to us and we all jumped forward to rush into the room. We all kind of just stood, side by side, next to his bed, staring down at him, sadly…anxiously….

“Bobby…you listen to me. You will not go into any light you see, got it? If you do, you are forever going to be the idjit. Not us” I cracked a smile but I had slow tears forming and falling. “You can’t do this to us…especially not to these morons…” I murmured.

Then, a nurse walked in. “Sorry. We need to get moving. “Right. Yeah” Sam said…then I felt him look at Dean, then at me. “Hey umm, Bobby…” he started as he grabbed Bobby’s hand. “Just…thanks…for everything” he said and let go.

“All right. Please step back” the nurse said.

We began to do so…but then I noticed Bobby’s hand twitch…and then his friggin eyes shot open! “Wait!” I yelled. “Stop. His eyes are open” Sam added. “Bobby?” Dean asked.

Then, he removed the respirator thing that was covering his mouth and his nose and he opened his mouth, but he was struggling with words.

“Don't talk. Don't talk. A pen…” Dean started and found a marker at the end of the bed. “Here, here, here” he said, handing it to him.

He took it and began to write a series of numbers across the palm of Sam’s hand. I watched him carefully as he did so and I could tell this was really hard for him…he was trying so hard just to finish writing this number out…he was trying so hard just to breathe on his own. Then, he smiled slightly as we all began to lean closer to him.

“Idjits” he breathed out.

But, then his head fell back to the pillow and he shut his eyes. I looked up at the monitor and his heart began to flat line. “Bobby? Hey!” Dean grunted.

Everything was going in slow motion again. We were slowly pushed out of the room as the nurse called a code for assistance. I saw everyone around us moving slowly as they were running in toward Bobby’s aid. One actually shoved passed Dean accidentally. Dean looked down at me and I looked back up at him as he grabbed my hand. But, then I saw doctors rushing down the hallway…and I didn’t like the feeling I was getting. So, I let go of Dean’s hand…getting the worst feeling of emptiness ever…and I rushed down the hallway…toward Brit’s trauma room. The boys were torn about what to do…but they followed.

“She’s crashing” a nurse said.

“Charge to 300...clear” another said.

My eyes widened as I got there and stopped short. “No…this can’t be happening…”

I realized I had tried to run into the trauma room but Dean was holding me back. It was instinct to go help her…I needed to help her. I needed to save her. No matter what the cost would be…but Dean would never have it. All we could do…all I could do…was watch my best friend…my sister…and my father figure begin to lose this battle we’ve been working so hard to fight against…and I just couldn’t do anything about…which is one of the worst feelings in the world…to feel helpless. “Brittney!” I screamed with tears running down my face.

Bobby’s POV

I was back in my house. In my kitchen. With my kids in the living room. “You micro-brewing in there, or what? Come on, we got a lot of Chuck Norris to get through. Let's go” I heard Dean call from the living room.

I opened the refrigerator and got out four beers. “Nice move, waking up like that” the reaper said as he appeared behind me.

“Motivation's a mother”

“You know why it's dark out there, don't you?” he asked me and my eyes glanced to the windows. I saw there was no moon…no stars…it was all just darkness. “This house…it's your last island, everything else melted by that bullet, gone. This is your last chance to come with me and move on. For your own good, Bobby, let go. They'll be okay without you”

“Last memory, huh?” He nodded. “Glad I saved the best for last” I added and just walked away, into the living room.

I saw Sam on the couch, eating pop corn and then Dean sat beside him. “All right, scoot, jerk-face. Show your elders some respect” he said to him. “You scoot, ass-hat” Sam replied, throwing a popcorn at Dean.

“Hey jerk-face, ass-hat” Melissa said as she and Brittney walked in with a plastic bag. “Why don’t you both scoot over and make room for the ones who have the goods” Brittney added.

They both sat in between the boys, side-by-side, leaning into each other as they leaned back into the back cushions and Melissa had her legs across Dean’s lap as Brittney had her legs across Sam’s. I headed on in with the beers, handing each of them one and then I sat down in a chair in front of them to just watch them.

“Did we get licorice?” Dean asked, mostly looking at Melissa.

“Umm is it in the bag?” she replied, sarcastically.

“No, it’s not in the bag, smart ass”

“No, we did not get licorice. We got good snacks. Licorice is disgusting” Sam said.

“I'm sorry. I didn't quite understand that Mr. Peanut-Butter-and-Banana Sandwiches?”

“Yea, that is kind of gross, hon” Brittney laughed lightly.

“You know what? I stand by that sandwich. Nobody likes licorice. It's made of dirt”

“It is a classic movie food. It's right up there with popcorn” Dean argued.

“Popcorn? Really?”

“Yes”

“You're out of your mind”

“Ya know, what happened to good old M&M’s?” Melissa voiced, mostly looking at Brittney.

“I agree” she said, reaching into the bag to grab two bags of them.

“You two would say that. It’s a chick snack” Dean commented.

They both scoffed and then Melissa lifted her leg up to kick her foot into his jaw. He grunted. I chuckled lightly. I noticed they all started to fade though.

“Licorice is like little chewy pieces of heaven though” Dean continued. “Oh, chewy pieces of heaven if you're a girl” Sam said. “Hmm our men, the candy sexists” Brittney joked. Melissa laughed.

It made me smile even more…and I still had the smile on my face when they all disappeared completely.

“Well, Bobby? Stay or go…what's it gonna be?” the reaper asked me.

I stared at the couch in front of me and just held onto the memory for a bit longer. Then, I looked up at him and at the swinging watch he was holding. I could almost hear the ticking…it was so loud…. This couldn’t be it for me, could it? I was really going to go out like this? A bullet shot to the head, shot by a stupid leviathan? I couldn’t leave the kids yet…could I? They know everything they need to know…but they’re pretty much helpless without me.

Then, all of a sudden, the doors that led to my kitchen began to slide open. I looked in that direction and my eyes widened at who I saw standing there. I didn’t believe it…or…I didn’t want to believe it.

“Brittney?”