Wake of Devastation, Lost in Desperation

My dreams flitted through my mind uneasily, never lasting for more than a minute. They kept going back to Micheal, and the look of shock on his face after I had slapped him.

Why had I done that? I didn't know. I hadn't slept well last night, that was why, despite my dreams, I slept so easily now. Had I been irritable? Yes. Was that an excuse? Never. I had just put myself through the most traumatic experience: hurting the man I loved the most.

Did it help that Eurydice was happy again? No, no it didn't. I couldn't help the sick feeling of envy, the feeling of betrayal that crept itself into my heart. Was I the only one still resisting, am I fighting this battle alone?

Yes. Everyone is on their side. You are on your own.

I remembered the words the psychic had muttered to me as I left my chamber just yesterday morning.

"When it all comes down, and you're left alone, weasel your way in. They lie, and so shall you."

My eyes flew open, and I felt strong arms around me. I almost called his name, but I stopped myself, remembering who it was that had brought me back to this cursed room. I looked up at him, feeling like a child, as he rocked me back and forth, quiet as a mouse.

"Robert?" I whispered. He looked down at me slowly. "I- I'm sorry."

"I'm not the one you should be apologizing to," he said, putting me on the bed and heading for the door.

"No!" I shouted. "Don't leave. Please don't leave." My voice sound childish and desperate. The last time I'd been so vulnerable, Micheal and the boys hadn't even been around. I'd been five years old, clinging to my mother's arm, watching my father as he was whipped for disobeying King Ronald.

Robert stared at me, his eyes softening, and he came and gathered me up in his arms again. Something about him, about his presence, reminded me of my father, my real one. Did he know who killed him? Would he be able to help me find him?

With a jolt, I realized that that was what I wanted. For me to feel okay, for me to trust the elves, would be for me to slay the monster that took my father's life. It was only right, and it was fair; if they helped me, I would trust them.

But first, there was something I had to do.

"Will you come with me?" I asked, my voice still child like as he rocked me again. "To apologize to Micheal?"

He was quiet, and I listened to his heart beat as he contemplated what he should do. Then he nodded slowly and helped me to my feet. I clung to his arm and he led me out of the room and towards Micheal's chambers.

He waited outside as I stepped in, and I made careful not to make any sound. I still wasn't sure what to say to him, and I was afraid that if he heard me before I could make my plea, he would send me away.

I looked around his first room and saw nothing, so I advanced toward his bed chamber and paused in the door way, hearing words being exchanged. It took a while for my eyes to adjust to the darkness of the room, and when I did, what I saw made my heart stutter and nearly fail.

Eurydice stood talking to Micheal furiously, and the speed of her words didn't let me catch them. Micheal stared at her, his eyes not betraying a thing, and then she grasped his face in her hands.

I backed away and let out a noise of utter astonishment, too low for either to hear.

The sense of betrayal made my heart black, and I left the room before either could come out, hurrying briskly into the hall and grabbing Robert's arm in my hand.

"Micheal's got a task for us," I said. "We have to get our things, and we're going to track down some shape shifters. He wants to see if we can find the ones who.. who killed my family."

He looked at the room quickly, as if expecting Micheal to come out and confirm what I had just told him. "He's kind of busy. Making plans." Yes, making plans alright. Fury enveloped my black heart in red and I felt like I had to get out of here. "We're to go out ahead with Joseph and Bradley. Can you go get everything ready?" He nodded and began towards where I thought his and the other's chambers were. I watched him go, not an inch of guilt piercing my heart. There was no room.

"Decieving us all, aren't you, Sayer darling?" I turned on my heal to see Queen Vira, who smiled at me. She was a bit close for comfort, but I didn't dare move. "You're supposed to be the calm, level-headed queen ready one like Jakobi always tells me," My adopted father's real name. What was this queen's tie to him? "But yet, you are not. Would you like to know a secret, Sayer, before you go? So that you'll carry it with you while you fight to find the ones who murdered your family?"

I could hear Robert calling to me, and I think he saw me, but he didn't come near.

Queen Vira smiled. "Micheal's father is alive, and well. He has no other children, because when you mate with an elf, you can only reproduce with that elf."

What was she getting at?

"He's the king of another kingdom, and the things we did were prohibited. That's why he doesn't know of his son. Would you like to know who Micheal's father is?"

I didn't think I wanted to, but the way she said it intrigued me. I needed to know. What was going on?

She smiled deviously. "Not even Micheal knows. I've kept it a secret for twenty nine years, Sayer. Feel special, feel important." She looked behind her quickly, making sure no one else could hear.

"Micheal's father is King Jakobi the first, ruler of Nove Hrady."