Fat

I've put on another kilo. It makes me feel horrible, but so many people say it's a good thing. I don't think it is. They're trying to make me fatter. I hate it. I hate eating. 

A nurse, Jessie, caught me trying to throw up my dinner tonight. She yelled at me. It made me feel like crap. And what's even worse is that Lucas has to work tonight and was at school all day today so he hasn't and can't come and visit me and kiss me and hold me at all all day. 

Mother came and visited me though. She said her doctors appointment went well. She's about 2 months along. That means my baby brother or sister will be arriving in early November, if things work out well. It's exciting. I never ever thought I'd be a big brother. I hope I'll be a good big brother. Lucas says I will be.

He's a big brother too, but he's also a younger brother. He has a big sister called Martina, who's a model like he is, and a little sister called Bridgett and a little brother called Nathan. He says I should go to his house when I'm "better" and meet them. He said they want to meet me because he's told them a lot about me. I got nervous when he said that but he chuckled and told me that everything he said was good things about me. I was going to say something then about how he wouldn't have had much to say (because it's true), but then he kissed me and I forgot. 

It's late. I'm tired and Lucas is coming early tomorrow to spend the whole day with me. I want to be awake when he arrives. So...it's time for my beauty less-ugly sleep. I can't wait to kiss my boyfriend (I still get really excited when I associate that word with Lucas) tomorrow. I've missed him today.