I Give My Heart To You

(F.F One Month)

The familiar feeling of bile rising up in my mouth came over me, and I leaned over the toilet once again. I had been throwing up every morning for the last three weeks and I didn't know what was wrong. I hadn't told Brian because I didn't want him to worry, but Alice, Lola, and Mary now knew.

Alice rubbed my back soothingly and Lola held my hair back as I threw up again. When I was done Mary handed me a damp wash cloth and I wiped my mouth, getting up to sit on the side of the tub.

"How long did you say this has been happening?" Lola asked.

I took a drink of water from the cup Alice handed me and replied, "About three weeks. I don't know what's wrong."

They all three glanced at each other nervously before Alice asked, "Lily, have you had your period yet?"

I furrowed my brow and answered, "No, but I can't be pregnant. Brian always uses a condom."

Mary bit her lip and wrung her hands. "Yeah, but Tyler didn't when he raped you, did he?" she asked quietly.

My eyes widened as I realized she was right. "Oh my god no! I can't be pregnant with his child! I just can't!" I sobbed as I started to tear up.

Alice hugged me and said, "It's alright, Lily. We don't know for sure if you're pregnant. It could be some sort of bug or something for all we know."

"Do you want me to go get a test, hun?" Mary asked.

I nodded my head and she gave me a hug before leaving. Lola and Alice moved me out of the bathroom and into the living room before starting to tell me that it'd be okay, no matter what happened. I honestly tried to pay attention, but I couldn't. I was too worried and too nervous to think about anything else.

Ten excruciating minutes later, Mary returned and handed me the box. "Here ya go," she whispered and they each hugged me before I went back into the bathroom. I took the test out and looked at the small stick that could change my life forever in just five minutes.

After five minutes of pacing back and forth in the bathroom, I nervously picked the test up. A bright pink plus sign was showing on the screen, telling me that I was pregnant. I silently started to cry as the girls entered one by one.

"I'm pregnant," I whispered. "And it's Tylers' baby."

"Oh Lils, you don't know that," Lola said as she kneeled in front of me. "You and Brian have had sex since the rape, right?" I nodded my head. "Maybe one of his condoms broke. It's very possible," she told me as she wiped a tear off my face.

"Yeah, and besides, if it was Tylers' sorry-ass sperm against Brians', I know Brians' would win," Alice said, trying to lighten the mood.

"When are you going to tell him?" Mary asked.

"As soon as he gets home," I answered. "I can't keep this from him." The girls nodded their heads and we left the bathroom, me worrying about how Brian would react to this news.

"Lily, I'm home!" Brian called out an hour later. "And I've got some exciting news for you!"

I met him in the living room and kissed him before sitting down. "I've got something to tell you too," I told him, "but you can go first."

Brian smiled and said, "Well, the guys and I are going on tour!"

I smiled and replied, "That's awesome, Brian."

Brian hushed me and continued. "That's not all, though. We're bringing you and the girls with us! Isn't that great?" he asked happily. I smiled weakly and toyed with my hands. Brian noticed this and asked, "Lily? What's wrong? I thought you'd be more excited about this."

I looked up at him and said, "I am excited, Brian, I really am. But there's something I need to tell you." Brian quirked an eyebrow at me and I took a deep breath. I was afraid of how he was going to take this, but I needed to do it.

I looked into his chocolate brown eyes and said, "I'm pregnant, Brian."