Night and Day

Have you ever had those moments when you were in a crowd of people, swallowed up with this sea of partying that you stop dancing and look around utter horrified with what it was taking to be there? That was how I felt in LA, it took so much energy out of me to go to the clubs, drink and let loose. It made me utterly miserable to even try to be the good time gal and friend that joined in a journey of overindulgence. I think Troy was starting to burn out as well because we found ourselves feeling worse than we did in the beginning of the binge. We lied on his oversized bed refusing to get up and greet the bright sunny day that attempted to creep in through the shutters. As far as drinking went, I never surpassed my limits because I wanted to make sure Troy was taken care of. It was just better that way, me taking care of someone.

Staring at the ceiling while Troy slept I wondered what was next. I managed to move from the bed without disturbing Troy and I headed towards the bathroom so that I could wash the night from my skin. It had been over two weeks of this lifestyle and I was tired. Sleeping all day and drinking all night was getting to me regardless of the fact I actually was a night person. I just would rather get a little bit of sun and drink lots of water. Stealing one of Troy’s shirts after my shower I went to sit on his balcony that overlooked the busy street that separated the cars from more apartments, in the distance I could see the glimmering waters of the ocean. Two weeks and I hadn’t even gone to the beach. Because I had no bathing suit to my name with me I knew I could head down to one of the shops to buy one. Of course this would require me to put on pants, I deemed it a worthy mission and I thought it would benefit me to get moving before I was tempted to go back to bed. It was kind of nice to go out alone into the day, the world was different during the day and I entered the swim shop with high hopes. Luckily I was not disappointed I found a yellow vintage print bustier top and paired it with black bottoms in a pinup cut. Once I was done I went to a health bar to get Troy and I some fruit smoothies. I told the worker to put in some boosters for health on account of the binges we had been going on then headed back to Troy’s apartment. My ears perked when I heard the flush of the toilet and Troy shuffled out of the bathroom.

“Oi, wash your hands fool,” I say in a stern tone. Troy groaned and went back to the bathroom. I walked over to the open door and leaned against the frame holding our drinks while he washed his hands in a lazy manner.

“What’d you get?”

“Smoothies.”

“Nice,” he mumbles as he took the one I held out to him.

“I think you should take me to the beach,” I state.

“The beach?”

“I realized we hadn’t even gone there at all. I’m going to turn translucent if I continue sleeping through the day.”

“You are getting a little pale.”

“So are you, so let’s get some sun even just for a little while,” I reply with a small smile.

“It’s not the worst idea,” Troy says with elongated words. “Maybe I could get some shots in.”

“No more tequila for you, it’s not your friend.”

“I was talking about pictures you brat,” he counters shooting me a dirty look. I just smiled back in a cheeky manner. The trip to the beach was so much better than just lying around in the dark. Troy began getting ready and I did the same. Putting on the swimsuit I covered it up with an oversized shirt and I was ready for the day out. Because Troy was a bit of a pain about logistics I had to grab our towels while he busied himself readying his camera. We drove to the beach along the pacific highway and reached a more favorable spot to settle in. I set out the towels on the sand and Troy plopped down to begin fiddling with the settings on his camera. He knocked in the back of my leg and it caused me to fall over. Pushing myself up I turned to give him an irritated glare while he chuckled lightly.

“It’s adorable how easily your equilibrium can be thrown off.”

“Ass,” I mutter darkly.

“You know I don’t remember saying you could wear my shirt,” Troy comments.

“You threw up on my dress the other night, I’m entitled to do what I please including wearing your shirt.”

“Touche, but if you want to get some sun you should ditch the shirt.”

“I forgot to get sunscreen.”

“So?”

“I’m not about to get skin cancer,” I retort.

“You’re being ridiculous,” Troy responds shaking his head at me.

“Melanoma is no joke, it is preventable if you take proper precautions but deadly if you don’t.”

“I hope you know how neurotic you sound right now.”

“I’m not neurotic,” I argue.

“You eat Cheetos with chopsticks so you don’t have to get orange fingers,” Troy counters. “You also fix store displays and crooked picture frames at other people’s homes.”

“Fine I’m neurotic.”

“Just throwing this out there but I have yet to see you in a bathing suit.”

“Please tell me that’s not what the camera is for,” I respond shooting him a look.

“Of course not,” he replies with a cheeky smile. I got up onto my feet so that I may find someone who may have some sunscreen. Somehow I managed to get haggle some from a kid down the line in exchange for me to meet a few of his friends who had yet to arrive. I told him that would be fine and that I would be just down the way in the meantime. He nodded with a bright smile and I waved before heading back over to Troy. I began to put on the sunscreen and tossed it over to Troy as if to say he better do the same. Of course my maternal demands made him complain but he did what he was told. I eventually took off the shirt so that I could cover my shoulders and chest with the protective layer of lotion. Troy whistled and I smacked him in the arm with a quickness that startled him. I wiped my hands on the towel before grabbing my sunglasses from my bag and putting them back on. For a few moments I just closed my eyes and allowed the sun to warm my skin. Troy nudged me and I opened my eyes to shoot a glare to him but I saw a man standing before us.

“I believe my little brother let you take the sunscreen,” he spoke in a crisp and deep voice. My eyes traveled along his tall figure that just towered over me. He was a little pale with freckles sprinkled over his skin and his hair had a slightly red tinge to it. Sweet merciful Jesus I found a unicorn. This was an attractive ginger.

“Sorry, here,” I reply holding up the bottle to him.

“I don’t think he knew you were here with your boyfriend.”

“Oh I’m not her boyfriend, no not at all,” Troy responds. “This lovely lady is Amora and I’m Troy.”

“I’m Erik,” he smiles looking down at me. I held out my hand and shook his hand with a smile.

“It’s nice to meet you Erik.”

“We were going to toss around a football for a bit if you two would like to join.”

“I’m not big into football, but Amora here can throw a great spiral,” Troy states gesturing to myself.

“Is that so?” Erik replies with a big smile. Christ his smile was enormous and bright. “I think I’d have to see that for myself.”

“Are you questioning my abilities?” I counter with a smile.

“Maybe just a little, you do have small hands,” he counters with a hint of humor.

“I’ll be over in a bit.”

“I look forward to it.”

Once he was an earshot away I turned to Troy and punched his arm. He groaned in pain and rubbed his arm.

“One of us needs that all up on us, since he’s not gay, I’m not letting that beautiful man go to waste,” Troy says giving me a look. I hit him again. “You better go over there before I start taking pictures of you.”

“I do this because I love you,” I say as I took off my sunglasses and got up from my spot. I look down at him as he smiled up at me while holding his camera up threatening to take a picture. Walking in sand wasn’t easy for my short legs so I drifted closer to where the waves washed up so I was kicking up sand with every step. As I walked towards the group I began to get slightly nervous, this was not my area of expertise but I did know how to throw so that would get me somewhere. Erik smiled brightly at me and tossed the football over to me in a careful manner. He moved a small distance away from me and waited for me to throw but I gave him a look before I threw it over his head to his brother who had been a good twenty feet away.

Erik clapped his hands and walked towards me. We continued throwing the football around, garnering a nice group to begin a game of touch football. Things got a bit flirtatious between Erik and I. There was no denying that the man was attractive but I didn’t see it going any further than just something physical. Not going to lie, I liked that option but I was still unsure if that was I wanted. Erik seemed like a nice enough man and lord the fact he was so much taller than me just made me want him more. He coyly inquired whether we should exchange numbers and I told him to give me his. It didn’t take long before he procured a business card from his wallet and I gave him a smile before heading up the beach to take a moment to myself. Once I was out of sight I folded the card up and slipped it into the trash can. I stood looking out to the ocean when I felt someone step next to me. My eyes briefly went down and I noticed the expensive shoes.

“So I take it you aren’t going to call him,” Winston spoke.

“I don’t really see the point in it. I’m going to go grab my things I’ll be right back,” I say.

“How about you just come with me,” he states.

“I’m an asthmatic who’s been on a two week drinking binge, I’m not going to run off Winston,” I counter giving him a quick look.

“You’re also a liar so let’s not make a scene.”

I looked at him and saw how serious his expression was. It was best to do with he said because I could see the rather intimidating men that stood waiting in the distance. Without saying another word I did what I was told and I began to follow Winston to the town car that waited near the other men. Barefoot, I carefully walked across the barrier and onto the concrete. My hands worked to dust the sand off my bare legs, I could feel Winston’s gaze on me as I did so.

“Ammo are you heading somewhere?” Troy questions appearing with our things in his arms. I gave a smile at him and took my sandals as well as the shirt I had worn earlier.

“Looks that way,” I say still with a smile fixated on my face. Troy looked at me surprised.

“Well he is attractive, got history with him or something?”

“More or less, I’ll be back later,” I reply as I slipped on the sandals. I heard a few clicks and I looked up with my hands on my hips. Troy gave a sheepish smile.

“Behave yourself,” Troy smiles as he walked away. Typical Troy, he was always oblivious to possibly dangerous situations and always just snapping away with his camera. I shook my head and turned my attention towards Winston. Swiftly I put my shirt back on and got into the car with Winston. Now I know that something horrible was going to happen but I just didn’t want to give him the satisfaction of making me frightened. Not a single word was said as the car began to take off. I turned to look at Winston assessing the expression on his face.

“What’s this about Winston?”

“I think we’re past that Amora. How much did you get for the job?”

“What job?”

“Don’t even try to play dumb with me,” Winston snaps.

“I’m not,” I reply coolly.

“I’m not an idiot,” he retorts.

“I never said you were.”

“You know I like your apartment, it’s very quaint. I found some light reading, thought you might like it.”

My eyes went to the envelope he pulled from his jacket pocket. I recognized the erratic scribble of my name on the paper and Winston unfolded the letter that was within the white envelope. Be calm, don’t show emotion, don’t let him get to you. He cleared his throat and I watched as he began to read the last words that Eli had written to me.

“Mora, I don’t know why I’m writing this to you, probably because you’re the only one who didn’t judge me for who I was. You always tried to help me and I know I screwed everything up yet you never said I told you so. You kept encouraging me to be myself and that I would be happier if I just told the truth. It’s hard to keep lying to everyone else, just like it’s hard for you to let yourself go. Neither of us were ever fine were we? You were always so much better having everything together. I used to envy that but then I realized you probably felt worse than me. How could you accept me as you did? I know what we had wasn’t normal but it was so great. It frustrates me that no guy has given the time to know you better; I guess that’s why I tried so hard to be with you. We both loved for the sake of loving even though we didn’t know how. I don’t even know what I’m writing anymore, I don’t even know why I even bother. You always knew how to make me feel better or at the very least make me forget that there was anything wrong in the first place. You’re not here, I need you, why aren’t you here? I’m sorry I didn’t stick up for you, I’m sorry I was too scared to be okay,” Winston read. He took a moment to pause and look at me. I couldn’t even blink; my stare on him was so fixated on burning a hole right through him. “You really hate me right now don’t you?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” I retort in a cold manner. Winston smirked at me.

“Must be killing you to know that you were at my hotel when he needed you there with him. Think this could have been prevented if you didn’t take that job,” he says not taking his eyes off me. “Get me my things back and you won’t have to join this whack job in the afterlife.”

“Is that all?”

“I admire you Amora, most anyone would be in tears begging for mercy right now but not you.”

“Oh you are so pleased with yourself, aren’t you?” I counter.

“Who knows maybe when you get my guns back we can--” Winston starts to say but I cut him off. He had his hand on my knee and I smacked it away. I was fuming at this point and Winston merely smirked like it didn’t even matter. The car lurched to a stop and I saw we were stopped in front of an all-white hotel called The Standard. “You’re free to go sweets, and have this to keep you company. You’ve got two weeks.”

I took the letter and exited the town car. While the car pulled away I just stared the son of a bitch down. If I hadn’t had the restraint I had, I would have beaten the living hell out of that man. Standing there I turned my gaze to the hotel once the car was out of sight. I needed to take a moment to let it all sink in. It wasn’t that the threats that got to me, it was the low blow and that fact I held the letter of a dead man in my hands. I headed into the lobby with my sunglasses on to disguise my perturbed mood and inquired about the bar. The front desk woman smiled and pointed across the pristine lobby to the just as modern bar. Quickly I thanked her and headed over to the area.

As I sat there I pressed the cold glass against my face. The gin and tonic certainly helped a bit but still I was clutching onto the letter. There wasn’t anyone around so I opened it up to reread it, hoping that it would have been better. It wasn’t, I could barely read most of it, things had gone downhill. Eli’s writing had gotten worse, words were switched in some places yet I could see where Winston’s brain fixed those mistakes. My fingers trailed along the edge of the paper as my other hand lifted the drink to my lips. He was sick; I could see it now more than ever even if my vision was clouded by tears. Sucking it up, I began to dial the number that would get me someone that was going to give me a hand with this job. It rang a few times before a man picked up.