If I Die Young

I tried crawling back into bed without waking Johnny; sadly, that didn't happen. He shifted a bit so I could lay my head on his chest and he wrapped his arm around me. "Everything okay?" He asked, softly while kissing the top of my head.

I nodded slightly. "Dad just got a call from my doctor." He froze a bit at the news. Part of me didn't want to tell him, but the other part did.

"What did he say?" He asked, obviously waking up a little bit more now.

I sighed, snuggling closer to him. "It's not that important. I'll tell you in the morning."

He kept quiet for a few minutes while running his fingers through my hair. "The cancer's back, isn't it?" He asked after a while. I knew it wasn't a question, because he already knew the answer.

"It's okay, it's not that bad this time. They're going to try radiation first, and see if that works so I won't have to go through chemo again."

"I'm sorry, Sweetie," he said, wrapping his arms around me and pulling me closer to him. I wrapped my arm around his waist and curled my leg in-between his. I felt so comfortable, like there were no worries in the world for the moment. "If I could take it all away, I would."

I shook my head, looking up at him. "It's really okay, Johnny. Things always happen for a reason. God only gives things to you that you can handle; but he never said that it would be easy. This is obviously building me up and making me strong for another life lesson down the road."

"How can you be so strong?" He asked, giving me a puzzled look.

"I'm not as strong as people may think, Johnny. Even in my hardest times, I turn to my faith. You might not be able to see him, but God is always there when you need him the most. I might not seem like the most religious person, because I'm not, but that doesn't mean that I don't have faith." He nodded, trying to understand. "The reason I may seem so strong is because I've stopped trying to understand everything and making reason out of something. You can't control your fate or your future. What's meant to happen, will happen. While you might not be able to control every situation, you can control how you react to it. So, I've decided to try and stay strong through my sickness instead of turn bitter. If you stay positive, there's more of a chance things will turn out good in the end."

He was now smiling down at me. "That's amazing, Soph. You might not think you're strong, but you are. Everything you just told me proves that you are probably the strongest person I know." He kissed my forehead softly, before rubbing my back. "We'll just take this one day at a time. Things will turn out just fine."

The fact that he was speaking like it was the two of us in this together made my heart swell. Even if that wouldn't be the case sometime down the line, right now it was something comforting for me to hear.

The next morning I woke up alone. I looked to my bedside table and saw that Johnny had left me a note.

I didn't want to wake you so I thought I'd leave this note. I had to go run a few errands this morning. I'll call you sometime later today. Have a good day, beautiful.
-Johnny

I smiled as I read the note. He might have a badass attitude for the face of the band, but he was such a sweetheart; all of the boys are. Even when they're on their man periods, they're still big teddy bears at heart.

I decided to get up and get ready for the day. There were a few things I had to get done today, since school was starting in a few days. I still had to get school supplies and a few other things.

When I walked down to the kitchen after getting ready, Mom was there cooking. She did this whenever she was worried or upset... She cooked. I never understood why, but it seemed like it was a comfort thing for her.

As soon as she saw me, she grabbed me into a tight hug. I hated seeing her so pained like this, so I wrapped my arms around her and held on tight. "It's okay, Mom. I'll get through this just like last time."

"But you shouldn't have to go through this yet again," she whispered. I knew she was trying to hold back the tears because she didn't want McKenna to see. She might be young, but she was still a smart little girl, and could easily figure things out.

I pulled away, giving her a soft smile. "Everything will be okay, I promise."

She shook her head, giving a small smile of her own. "I love you," she said, giving my cheek a kiss, before she went back to her cooking.

"I'm going to go school shopping, so I'll be gone for a little while," I said, grabbing a banana out of the fruit basket.

"Okay, Sweetie. Take my card, it's in my purse," she said, nodding over to the table.

"It's okay, Mom. I still have money saved up in my account."

She gave me a look and I knew there was not going to be any arguing with her. "You are not going to spend your summer job money on your school supplies. Your father and I will pay for them just like every other year."

I laughed, shaking my head. "Okay, okay, don't get so defensive, Mom."

"When did you get so independent?" She asked, pouting.

"Don't worry, I'll still always need you and Dad," I said, giving her a kiss on the cheek, before heading for the front door.

As soon as I was about to open the door, it opened from the outside. I stopped in my tracks so I wouldn't run into whoever was coming in. When I saw who it was, I almost groaned, but I held it back.

"Oh, sorry, Soph," he said, stepping to the side and letting me walk out. I was a bit surprised he was acting so civil all of a sudden... Dad must have talked to him already.

I was almost to my car, when he stopped me. "What's up?" I asked, unlocking my car and throwing my bag in.

"Do you want to maybe meet up at Starbucks later? Maybe around two or so?" He asked, almost awkwardly.

I was a bit taken aback, but I still nodded. "Sure, the one on Main Street?"

"Yeah, that sounds good," he said, nodding.

"Okay, I'll see you then." I got in my car and drove off.

Well that should be interesting.