Dear Blank

As he entered the apartment that he shared with Taylor, Jordan tossed his hoodie onto the bench in the entrance way. It was an abnormally warm early spring day and he had worn it for all of five minutes while he was out. He made his way to the kitchen and pulled a bottle of blue Gatorade out of the fridge. He turned to make his way into the living room, and as he did, Taylor showed up out of nowhere, startling him. “Jesus, Taylor!” Jordan exclaimed. “What the fuck!”

“That’s what I was thinking.” Taylor replied. He was pissed right off after seeing Sophie at the grocery store this morning. He knew what she was implying and the more he thought about it, the more it made sense. Jordan had told Taylor all about the night he and Sophie had gotten together so he knew that there was a possibility that her baby was his. Also, by the looks of her, the timing seemed to be right on track.

“What are you talking about?” Jordan questioned, not quite sure why his teammate and best friend looked so pissed off. Taylor was looking at him like he had just done something completely unthinkable; like he was some sort of douche bag. “What’s going on?!”

“Why don’t you tell me what’s going on?”

“Is this some sort of game, man? Because I really don’t have the time for..”

“I ran into Sophie at the grocery store this morning.” Taylor informed Jordan. “You remember Sophie, right?” He watched as Jordan’s face went pale. He threw his head back as he exhaled a long, shaky stream of air before facing Taylor again. The look on his face was all the confirmation that Taylor needed. Sophie was pregnant with Jordan’s kid. And he was letting her do it all by herself. “Jesus Christ, Jordan!” Taylor yelled and he took a step back. He was completely shocked. Sure Sophie had pretty much told him that the baby she was carrying was Jordan’s, but seeing the truth written on his face just completely blew Taylor out of the water. This wasn’t like Jordan. He wasn’t that guy.

“I don’t…She…”

“She what?! You’re honestly going to try and tell me that this is her fault?”

“No. She doesn’t want me around.” Jordan justified.

“This is your kid, Jordan! Who cares if she doesn’t want you around? It’s your fucking kid!” Taylor paced their living room. He was disgusted. He couldn’t understand how Jordan had just walked out on her like he had.

“I don’t think it’s mine.”

“Well fine! That’s a very reasonable thing to be questioning. But you don’t just fuck off and leave her on her own! Have a goddamn paternity test done and find out if it’s yours! Because if you don’t you’ll regret it. She’s convinced that it’s yours and if it is and you’re not there…it’ll be the biggest mistake of your life.” Taylor informed him. “You will regret that so much! Jesus, if it is yours you’ve already missed out on so much, man!”

“How is she doing?” Jordan asked quietly. He had thought about Sophie and the baby a lot in the past few months. She had to be nearing her due date, and despite what she may think of him, he did feel guilty. He just didn’t know how to go about fixing this. It was just so much easier for him to avoid it than confront it. He was just too young and too unprepared to have a baby. He had picked up the phone to call her a million times since November. He had even gone to her apartment, sat in the parking lot trying to think of what to say to her, but he hadn’t mustered up the courage to actually go in.

“She looks amazing!” Taylor informed him, but he knew that she would. That didn’t surprise him. “It’s crazy, man. You can’t even tell that she’s pregnant until she turns around, but she’s huge!” Jordan nodded. She would have to be by now. “She’s pretty much hates you though.” Taylor said without caring about Jordan’s feelings. “But you deserve it.” Jordan, again, just nodded. He knew it was true. “You need to get your shit sorted out, dude. You can’t keep putting it off. That baby is going to be here anytime now and I know you, Ebs. If that is in fact your kid, and you miss it being born you will never forgive yourself.”
__________

Jordan had paced his bedroom floor for the past two hours trying to come up with something to say to Sophie. He wasn’t sure exactly how you were supposed to go about telling a very pregnant chick that you wanted a paternity test. The last thing he wanted was to get her all emotional and upset. That couldn’t be good for her or the baby, right? Fuck. He thought as he collapsed onto his back on his bed. He had the worst headache of his life and he knew that it was only going to get worse. He knew he should have dealt with this way before right now. He raked his hand over his face and then finally managed to call her.

“Hello?” Jordan heard a male voice answer. He looked at the call display on his phone wondering if he had called someone else by mistake but, no, it was Sophie’s number that he had called. “Hello??” The guy said again, anger lingering in his tone. Jordan’s blood instantly began to boil. Who the hell was this guy?!

“Is Sophie there?”

“Who is this?” The guy had the nerve to ask.

“Well, I don’t think that is any of your business. Put Sophie on the phone.” Jordan demanded.

“Yah, I don’t think I want to.” The guy replied arrogantly.

“I don’t give a fuck about what you want. This has nothing to do with you. I called to speak with..”

“Who the fuck do you think you are, man?!”

“Who the fuck do I think I am?!” Jordan shouted into the phone. “I’m the father of her baby. Who the fuck are you?”

“I’m her boyfriend and the guy that has been picking up your slack ever since..” He was cut off mid sentence and Jordan could then hear Sophie’s voice.

“Shawn!” She shouted. “Who are you yelling at like that?!” Sophie could hear him screaming and cursing all the way in the bedroom. “Who is it?!” Clearly whoever was on the phone was someone that Shawn disliked very much.

“It’s your baby daddy.” He spat furiously. Sophie’s heart nearly stopped beating when she heard those words. She stared at Shawn with wide eyes unable to believe it. It couldn’t be him. She hadn’t heard a word from him since she told him she was pregnant.

“Jordan?” She asked lightly.

“Yah, Jordan.” He replied. He was pissed and he had every right to be. He had been there for her through all of this. They had started seeing each other before Sophie had known that she was pregnant and he had stuck around. He had been amazing for her through this and he had put up with way more than his fair share of her shit. She knew that she came with a whole lot of baggage. It was far from easy being with her.

“Here.” She muttered as she stuck her hand out for the phone but Shawn didn’t have any intentions of giving it to her. He just stood there staring at her. First of all he was shocked that the guy had even called and second he was pissed that Sophie wanted to talk to him. “Shawn. Give me the phone.”

“She’ll call you back.” Shawn said into the phone and then hung up, tossing the phone onto the couch to his left.

“SHAWN!!” Sophie shouted. She couldn’t believed that after all this time Jordan had finally called her and Shawn just hung up on him. “Give me the phone! I have to call him..”

“NO!!” He yelled back at her. “You do not owe that guy anything. Jesus, Sophie! He doesn’t fucking deserve to be a part of your life or hers!”

“He’s her dad, Shawn! Regardless of what’s happened…I still want him to be there.” Shawn’s face dropped at that revelation.

“What about me?” He asked.

“Don’t do this.” She told him. “Please, please don’t do this.”

“God dammit, Sophie! If he is going to be around then..”

“Then what?!” She challenged. “Are you trying to tell me that I need to pick between you and him? That would be a really simple decision if it weren’t for her.” Sophie told Shawn, absentmindedly resting her hand on her belly. “But nothing is simple anymore.” Shawn shook his head. To say that he was pissed off was an understatement. He was fucking livid. He had been playing daddy throughout her whole pregnancy and he had gotten quite comfortable with the idea. Now he didn’t know exactly what was going to happen.

“I don’t know, Soph.” He mumbled. This was all too much for him to deal with right now.

“I have to call him back.” She informed him.

“Yah. Well…I’ll give you a call then.” Shawn said as he turned for the door.

“Shawn!”

“I can’t do this right now, Sophie. So go call him.” With that, he disappeared out the front door. Sophie pushed it from her mind. Right now she had to focus on the bigger picture. She could fix things with Shawn later.

She took a deep breath and reached for her cell phone. As she was about to call him back the phone rang, display simply reading Jordan.

“Hello?” She answered shakily. She couldn’t explain it, but she was fucking nervous right now and she felt like she was going to throw up.

“Sophie?!” Jordan stated. He was caught off guard, fully expecting Shawn to answer again.

“Hi Jordan.”

“Hi.” He muttered. He wasn’t sure what to say to her now. He had called back to tell that guy exactly where to go. “Sophie, I’m sorry.” He confessed.

“Jordan..”

“No, Sophie. I really am sorry.”

“She deserves to have her dad in her life, Jordan.” Sophie told him. She kept on talking, but Jordan heard none of it. Sophie had said ‘she’. Jordan bent his head, pushing his forehead into his open hand. He was going to have a little girl. His eyes welled up with tears.

“She?” He managed to ask.

“Yah. I’m having a girl.” Sophie told him and then she distinctively heard sniffling. She knew that he was crying. “Listen. When I have her I’ll call you and you can come to the hospital and we’ll do the test then. I figure it’s easiest while we’re in the hospital already and..”

“I want to be there.” Jordan stated. Surpising not only Sophie, but himself as well.

“Oh.” She managed. “Uhm…okay.” Sophie didn’t know what to think. So much was happening so fast that it was making her head spin. “Well…why don’t we meet up somewhere and talk?”