Passenger Seat

“Rae, hey, wake up.” I heard John call out to me and nudge me in the arm. I opened my eyes and looked around and was confused at what was going on. I looked back at John, he was watching me with a small smile. My mind was slowly turning and it finally hit me what was going on, and when I remembered my dream I started to blush. I gave John a small smile trying my hardest not to make it seem like I just had a dream about him kissing me. He looked at me weirdly which made my cheeks redden even faster.

“W-where are we?” I fumbled over my words feeling awkward around John.

“Oh um,” he looked straight forward looking at the K-Mart, “I saw signs for a beach and I thought it'd be nice to go for a swim.” he looked back at me.

“So why are we at a K-Mart?” I asked in confusion.

“Oh well I forgot my trunks at home so I need to buy a pair. Do you need a bathing suit?” My eyes widened the thought of me and John being half naked made me feel uncomfortable. I didn't want to see John shirtless, it's not like I haven't seen him shirtless but this time it felt different. I shook my head no and he nodded his head in response and started to get out of the car.

“Well come on, we need to get bathing suits then.” I followed his league and got out of the car, I just did it a little bit slower. I was unsure on what to do. He was walking in front of me and I just stared at his back. I thought about the dream and the kiss and how amazing it was. I wondered if he was that good of a kisser like he was in my dream. I started to grow a small smile on my face but bit my lower lip and just stared at him as he walked in front of me. I saw the front doors to the store open when I snapped out of my thoughts, I couldn't be thinking about the way John kissed.

“Wait!” I yelled like it was an emergency. John quickly stopped and looked back at me with widened eyes and looked worried.

I started to laugh at how serious he looked and how serious I sounded. “Sorry I um well I just uh I'm not uh feelings so well.” I said all to quickly.

“Oh okay, hungry or what do you need?” I just shook my head, not really knowing what I was nodding my head to but I just kept on nodding.

“Alright, lets go.” He started to stick out his hand for me but I kept on walking making it seem like I didn't see it but I knew he knew I didn't want to take his hand.

We walked to his car and got into it, he started it up but didn't drive yet. We just sat there in complete silence.

“Are you okay?” he asked me. I looked over at him and I just nodded my head and smile.

“Yeah I’m sorry, I just I’m not sure really.”

“It's fine, if your not feeling good we can just drive around and find some where to relax.” I gave him a smile and he knew to turn on his car and look for some place to relax. It didn't take long to find a small park with lots of trees with shade. He parked his car closest to the entrance and walked to the park bench.

“Do you know what time it is?” I asked as I squinted up at John, I putting my hand over my forehead so it could block the sun from my eyes.

He brought his hand up and turned his wrist so he could read his watch.

“It's about 2:50. Are you hungry?” Food was the last thing right now, the feeling in my stomach didn't need food.

“No this feels nice.” I said as I leaned back against the bench, closed my eyes and smiled up at the sky. There was a light breeze and the sun was surprisingly not beating down on us. I felt john follow my actions and lean against the bench, he crossed his arms and on ascendent he nudged my arm, he let out a soft sorry. I couldn't stop thinking about my dream and the kiss and how romantic the whole scenario was.

“Whats something you miss?” I heard John say. I looked over at him and thought it was cute that he was the one asking a question.

“Something I miss?” I was re-asked and he nodded his head. “That’s tough, there's a lot of things I miss and wish were still in my life.”

“Well there has to be something that you really miss.”

“Well I guess I miss my childhood, I miss when everything was good and everything wasn't so complicated.”

“I think everyone misses that.”

“Yeah probably but to me that's when everything was good. Before my mom died everything in my life was almost perfect. After she died everything became difficult and just not what I wanted.” I said I looked down not really wanting to look into his eyes.

“How old were you when she died?”

I looked up and saw his sad eyes, this was why I didn't like talking about my moms death. I didn't want to see other peoples sadness, why should they be sad?

“I was only 8.” I let out a long sigh.

“Man that must have been tough. Growing up without your mother. I'm sorry.”

I just nodded my head not really knowing how to respond to that. How do you respond to something like that?

“What do you miss?” I asked trying to change the subject. I knew that confused him, he wanted me to say more but I didn't feel like opening up that much.

“I miss high school. I know that sounds weird but I miss all my friends. Going on tour you lose a lot of your friends and I just miss them I guess.”

“But you still have a lot of friends.”

“Yeah I do but the only time I really see them is at a party and their getting drunk. They don't care that our friendship is gone, they just want to get trashed.” I felt bad for him, and all the other boys, I never really saw that they lost a lot of their relationships, they were all pretty popular boys and when their in town there’s always a party to celebrate the tour, and so many people come out to party with them. But John was right, no one cared that they weren't here they just wanted to get wasted.

“Well obviously those people weren't suppose to be in your life. Everyone that you need, is in your life and that’s all that counts.” He looked down at me with a big smile on his face. He wrapped his left around me and pulled me closer to him.

“Yeah your right.” that's all he said and that;s all he needed to say. We stayed in that position for a pretty long time. Clouds started to roll in and we would point out the ones that looked like shapes. The breeze started to pick up and it was getting cooler.

“Do you want to go?” John asked me.

“Yeah but where will we go?” He looked around trying to think of something.

“I have no clue.” he laughed out. Even though we had no clue where we were going we still went to the car to cover from the soon to be rain storm. We stayed in the car and watched as this storm came in and got everything drenched.

John looked over at me with a huge smile on his face. I tiled my head a little to the side and furrowed my eye brow.

“What?” I started to smile and I knew something was up his sleeve.

“Do you want to go to dance in the rain?” He asked. I started to shake my head from side to side.

“No, I don’t want to get wet.”

“Oh come on, live a little.” he said as he opened his door but before he got out and turned to me.

“I thought I was no fun? I guess the tables have turned.” I gave him a small glare and then smiled and quickly jumped out of my seat into the rain and started to run around and jumping in the puddles. John came out of the car and ran towards me, he raised his arms above his head and jumped around.

I looked up at the sky and smiled and copied Johns actions. I spun around and jumped in the air. These were moments that I felt alive, I felt free from the world. I felt Johns arms around my waist and once I knew it I was being picked up and spun around in the air. I couldn't help but to laugh and scream. He put me down and we both fell to the ground laughing. We laid on the ground as the rain kept falling, I closed my eyes and I felt Johns hand grab a hold of mine. My eyes were closed so rain wouldn't get into them and I just smile.

“I had a dream about you.” I said softly he looked over at me but furrowed his eye brow.

“What did you say?”

“I said y-you uhum were in my uh dream.”

He scoot over to his side so he could look at me better and he just smiled. “Really? What was it about?” I started to think about the kiss and I started to blush and smile. I looked at him and he looked fascinated. He gave me a nod telling me to go on.

I bit my lower lip and finally told him. “Well we um kind of kissed.” I couldn't help but to smile by now.

“Was I a good kisser?” he asked after I was done talking

I shot my eyes over at him and he had a serious smile like he really wanted to know.

“I-I uh I don't know, it w-was a dream.” I stuttered out. It might have been a dream but I remember perfectly that he was a great kisser and deep down inside I wanted to feel his lips on mine.

“Oh right.” he said slowly, nodding his head slowly. The rain was still coming down and there was not one spot on us that was dry. But we stayed on the ground for a little bit longer until we decided it'd be best to get out of the rain and take cover.

“I have a blanket in my car that you can wrap your self in.” John said as we ran to the car, his hand still holding mine. He opened my door and I quickly got in and he shut it, running to the trunk to get the blanket and darted to his seat and trying not to get the blanket to wet.

“Ah thank you.” I said as I felt the warmth of the blanket around my arms.

“Do you want some of the blanket?” I asked as I offered him some of it. He looked at me and started to laugh.

“What?” I asked as I started to laugh for no reason.

“You just look so cute, you have mud all over yourself.” I looked down and noticed all the clumps on myself.

“I wouldn't be talking if I was you.” My eyes trailed over his body noticing he had just as much mud on him as I did. He looked down at himself and started to laugh.

“I guess were getting a motel tonight so we can shower.” He looked over at me and the way he said that made me blush and his eye widened and he started to blush also. “ I didn't mean it like, oh my god.” I started to laugh the way he was freaking out was cute.

“I gotcha.” he nodded and started up his car. We drove around finding a small motel a little bit nice than the one we had before. We got out bags together and got a room. There were two beds this time so John wouldn't have to sleep on a cot. As John was in the shower my phone rang and it was my father, I knew I had to pick up but I really didn't want to.

“He-”
“Where are you?” he cut me off and started to scream. “ I am worried sick... you haven't called or texted and I haven't seen you in a couple days. Where the fuck are you?” his voice started get more and more louder.

“Like you really care. I'm safe. I'm with John, everything is alright. Stop freaking out.”

“Don't talk to me like that. Whose John? Did you kick Kennedy finally to the curb for someone better?”

“Don't every say that. John is just a friend and no I didn't kick Kennedy to the curb and that’s none of your business.” What happened between Kennedy and I was our business not his.

“Then why are you with John? Are you trying to get a new fuck for the night?” he said making me gasp. I hated when my dad became like this. He sounded like he had been drinking and that’s what makes everything worse.

“Shut the fuck up and don't call me. Good bye.” and with that I hung up the phone and looked over to see John standing there.

“Was that Kennedy you were talking to?” he said with worried eyes.

I let out a small laugh “No it was just my dad.” I got up and went to get some clothes from my bag.

“Oh, is everything alright?” he asked.

“In my eyes yes.” I said and went into the bathroom for my shower.

I finished my shower, putting on some yoga pants and a simple shirt. I braided my hair to get it out of my face. When I got out of the bathroom John was putting on his shoes.

“Where are you going?”

“Just put on some shoes and follow me.”