Hear Me Now

Running down the hall, I slipped falling down the stairs to the landing. Raising myself to my knees I looked up at the figuring closing in.

A quiet clicking of her tongue; a dissatisfied sigh her words burning like acid as she slowly stepped down the solid oak stairs. “Oh Jamie, when will you learn? When will you finally start to take after your parents and let’s not pretend, we both know you never will.”

Scrambling towards the rest of the stairs, I made it down two before her bony fingers had hold of my hair. With a firm yank, she had me flush against the wall her free hand on my throat.

“You know I very much enjoy being your enforcer but it is getting rather old, having the same punching bag over and over. Shall I end it this time and simply tell your mother that accidents happen? She would understand after all, you were an accident,” humming, she tightened her fingers releasing my hair to slap away my arm as I tried to fight back. Shaking her head, she laughed as I began to gasp my airways blocked. Kicking out I missed and began to claw at her wrist.
I didn’t want to die. I was tired of my mother punishing me for being myself.

Good grades, good behavior – were those not things that parents wanted from their children.

Apparently not mine; shutting my eyes I tried to relax, to remember the last time I had been able to do wandless magic and then imagined what I wanted to do to Agnetha.

Even as her hands fell away and my lungs expanded with much needed air, I didn’t open my eyes. I found myself growing angrier and angrier and even as Agnetha collapsed fighting me, I kept going. My thoughts much darker, I flicked my hand to the wall eyes flashing open as the thud echoed the empty halls.

I would not die today or any other day, my mother would never again punish me and Agnetha would never leave these halls.

Smirking as her eyes widened in her last moments of panic I laughed as I gave one final squeeze her blood flying in all directions. Dropping my hand, I stared up the stairs before wiping at the bit of tissue and blood on my face. In one motion, I started up Agnetha’s lifeless body already chilling trailing behind me as I headed to the room I knew she would be waiting in – waiting for my apologies.

Stopping outside the door, I took an even breath dropping my hold on the body and sniffed pushing the door open to enter my mother’s study. Shuffling towards her desk in the center of the room, I slouched as she rose.

Tsking she moved slowly around the desk the way she always did; chin high, back straight in a move that made it look like she was floating. “Jamie do you have something to say to me,” never a question, I winched as my mother’s voice darkened at my lack of a response. “Jamie!” trying not to shiver at the ice in her voice, I braced myself as her thin, white hand met my cheek. I could feel the sting as she pulled back. “Agnetha you failed, try again” calling at the door she sat back in her chair, “Agnetha,” impatient and angry, my mother was not used to waiting, not used to being ignored. “Agn –“

“She can’t answer you mother,” straightening, I felt shame as I giggled at her anger. If ever I had made my mother proud, surely this would be that moment. Opening the door, I levitated her enforcer’s body into the room dropping her on the floor in front of the desk. “This is over, Cecilia next time, it will be you” turning as she let out a scream half way between pain and wrath, I shut the door behind me and moved quickly to my room where I collapsed against the door, shudders ripping through my body as the gravity of my actions crashed into me.

I was a monster.

Sitting upright in my bed as the nightmare eased, I stared blankly out the window at the dark, smoldering predawn sky. It had been two years since that night and still every few months whenever my mother was to return from business the memories would resurface. The years of abuse leading up to that night never haunted me; I had made my stand and in truth I was proud of myself for putting an end to it. My only wish was that I had been able to find another way.

Laying back against my green pillows, I shook with the force of my tears and only when I refused to cry more did I push myself up and out of my bed, straightening the sheet and duvet before moving to my bathroom.

I hated making extra work for the two house elves my mother left here with me all year round as she moved city to city, country to country working as she said for a better cause. I wasn’t a fool, I knew my mother and my father although him had no memory of, were Death Eaters. Dark wizards working for Lord Voldemort; I knew that on her trips that was what she was doing – his work.

Running the water I waited for it to warm before stepping into the spray. Knowing both my parents were essentially evil, I wondered how my sister lived with our father. Had she been corrupted or had she like me found a way to survive outside the darkness?

Lather, rinse, repeat my routine never changed not even when I had school. Shower, breakfast and then a few chapters of whatever book I was currently reading or the little bit of mail I got from my owl, Hadrian every morning.

Given how early I was up though, I knew I wouldn’t have any mail and it was much too soon for breakfast but it was never too soon to bake cookies and anyone that disagreed with that fact was either crazy or very much in denial.

Once dressed in sweats, I reached for my dirty habit putting the butt between my lips and lighting the smoke with magic. Although, I knew it was taboo and I shouldn’t be using outside of school I did it anyways. What was the point of magic if you couldn’t use it? Walking down the hallway, I moved into the kitchen. I hadn’t slept on the second floor, let alone climbed those stairs since that night and I didn’t plan on it.

Pulling out everything I needed for chocolate chip cookies, I put the kettle on to boil for a hot cup of tea and started mixing sugar with butter following step for step signing aloud to the song in my head.

“Remember, you never said, this wasn’t what you wanted was it; was it?” shimmying to All We Know by Paramore, I spun on my heel removing the steaming purple kettle pouring the water quickly as I flicked the oven on for the cookies. By the time the first batch was rolled and in the oven my tea was steeped enough for my liking and with one sugar in I dropped onto the window seat and stared at the rising light.

My house was surrounded by trees and I loved the quiet; there was never any need for me to pretend which is what my life was, one great big deception. At this point I didn’t know if I would ever just be able to be me.

“Mistress?” jumping at the sudden intrusion on my thoughts, I looked to the elf before me offering a smile “Your mother is in the sitting room, waiting for you” bowing her head, Delphi backed away a quick glance at my mess giving her an excuse to stay far from the sitting room and my vindictive mother.

Rising, I sighed smile slipping slightly as I carried my cup with me towards the one room I didn’t want to be in at that moment. Pushing the door open with my hip, I called out a greeting to my mother and looked around at her impatient huff.

“The fire Jamie, honestly” crackling with the heat, she looked disapprovingly at my attire as I approached.

“Hello mother, are you upstairs and simply didn’t want to see me in person?” asking out of honest curiosity, I dropped into the armchair placed precisely for situations like this.
Laughing sarcastically, she stopped suddenly and narrowed her gaze. “Hardly, pack your things only the necessary and prepare to move, you will floo at four pm sharp. Don’t be late,”

“Moving -?” stopping short as she vanished, I rolled my eyes. How was I supposed to floo if I didn’t know where I was going! Standing I threw my cup against the wall, watching as it shattered my temper once more having gotten to me. Growling, flicked my wrist repairing the damage before turning on my heel no longer in the mood for cookies.

Slamming my door, I stared at a note on my pillow and moved to grab it. Scoffing at the address on it, I grumbled the paper and set it on fire holding the flame in front of me watching with pleasure as it burned. We would see how well this move went.

1348 Wesley St, Devon, England