Second Chance

Annabelle's POV

I walk mindlessly through the busy streets of New York, not really paying attention to where I'm going, knowing the path like the back of my hand. It's always the same small café.

It's a sunny, very rare day. it's one of those days where you just want to stand outside & soak up the sun. One of those day where you just want to think about everything and nothing at the same time. You just want to live.

But I can't seem to have that day. I can't seem to be so carefree. I'm a 26 year old woman engaged with a man & pregnant with another man's baby. I'm an unfaithful fiance that doesn't deserve the life she has. I don't deserve the blessings I have in my life because of all the sins I've commited.

I don't deserve to have a job I enjoy doing, cuz I had to leave everyone that mattered to me behind, just to achive this tiny goal... family, friends... him.

I don't deserve to have the family & friends that I have. That are so crazy about me. Family & friends that care so much about me that are able to forgive me & accept me, even though I've made more mistakes than rights in this life.

I don't deserve the wonderful fiance that I have. A fiance that would give me the stars & the moon if I asked him for that. A fiance that's so in love with me, that he would give his last breath just so I could keep breathing. A fiance that has been perfect in every single way. A fiance that has been there for me when I had nobody. A fiance I cheated on. A fiance I'm gonna have to look in the eyes for the rest of my life knowing that I lied to him.

I don't deserve to have a man so in love with me that was willing to lose his friends, to throw away his marriage just for me. I don't deserve Brian.

Placing my hand on my belly, I sigh. "& I definitely don't deserve you" I softly say. I sure as hell don't deserve the blessing of becoming a mother. Of bringing a life to this fucked up world. MY fucked up world. But I can't do anything to change that now.

There's nothing I can do about it now. I made a HUGE mistake by getting together with Brian, AGAIN, but what's done it's done. I can't change the past. All I can do is move foward & have a great future with John. He deserves it more than I do. He deserves to be happy, with or without me.

The first thing I need to do when I get to my office is make an appointment with the doctor, so I can be completely sure that I'm pregnant. I know I am, but I want to be 110% sure. It would put down to rest all the anxiety that has rub on me from John.

Oh... John.

I sigh.

"ANNA" Pauline yells/screech once she sees me, making me realize that I automatically arrived to my destination. Huh... I guess I was in a deeper thought than what it seems.

I smile. I have missed her. I notice a quiet Shannon sitting there with her, her gaze down. & suddenly I feel the guilt hit me. I was such a bitch with her yesterday.

"Hey, Line" I say, hugging her, since she has me embraced in a tight hug. That's just the way she greets everyone. She lets go of me & eyes me quickly & her smile slowly disappears.Oh my God... she knows.

Her eyes travel to my womb, which is flat as it can be since I can tell I'm not uber advanced in the pregnancy. At least I don't think I am. See... this is why I need this appointment.

I look straight at her when her gaze meets mine, questioning me. Sure, by my look, she knows the answer to her unspoken question.

"Does he know?" She silently asks me. The thing is... I don't know to which he she's referring to.

See... Pauline & I have grown so close to each other over the years that it's almost ridiculous how we can tell what's wrong by just looking at each other. & she has such a radar to spot a pregnant woman or a gay guy. She claims she developed it when she was pregnant the first time.

Another perk of our friendship is that I can talk to her about everything. She knows everything that happened between me & Brian. I think I owed her an explanation once I arrived here with no husband & no kid. & right now... I really need someone to talk to. So I really look foward to our talk, cuz right now she´s the only one I can talk about this. She has no hidden agenda & doesn't take sides since she isn't close to either Brian or John. & I know she won't judge me. She's not like that.

"Can we talk about this later?" I ask her & she nods.

I walk beside her & take my sit next to Shannon. She gives me a barely there smile when she dares to acknowledge me. I grab her & hug her while a whisper a small apology for only her to hear.

When we part, she has a big grin in her face. I turn to look at Pauline & she doesn't seem curious to know what the hell was that about & I'm glad she doesn't. I just wanna have a nice brunch with my girlfriends & forget about everything else. At least for a couple of hours. I really think I deserve that.

Zacky's POV

"So, he just quit?" Gena says, while we lay on bed watching TV since I have nothing to do & I coax her into taking the day off se we can spend it together.

I'm cuddle up on her, my head on her chest, arms wrapped around her, while she delicately runs her fingers through my hair in a soothing way.

"Yeah. I mean, it was just a spur of the moment type of thing, you know. He was pissed & things escalated quick, but he'll come around" I say, rubbing her side gently, closing my eyes for a second.

"You think?" She asks, apprehension in her voice. I look up to see her face & see it's full with worry.

About what? I'm not sure. If it's about Brian, I don't think she should be worried. I'm not worried. & I assure her just that.

"Don't worry, baby, it's Brian we're talking about here. He's gonna hold this grudge for a couple of days & then things will be ok again. Happens all the time" I say, shrugging off her worries.

"I wouldn't be so sure about it" She says, catching my attention. Now I'm beginning to worry. "We're not talking about a missing guitar or a ruined fedora here, Zack. We're talking about Brian & Matt getting into a fist fight. Yes, what Brian & Annabelle did was a shitty move, going behind Michelle's back like that, but they love each other. & just because Jimmy stuck his nose where he shouldn't, Brian ended up in a miserable marriage with a woman he doesn't love. & now she's pregnant. It's like he's gonna be stuck being miserable for the rest of his life" Gena says. "How would you feel if the guys turned & fucked your life like that? Isn't it supposed to be that your friends always have you back, no matter what?" She asks me, & I notice something different in her voice but I don't know what it is. It sounds like... anger? Indignation? "What would you do if you were Brian? How would you feel?"

"Sweetie, it's gonna be fine" I try to reassure her but something in her just snaps.

"No, Zack. It's not gonna be fine" The calmness in her voice scares me. It's low & menacing. She is seriously pissed. "Nothing is gonna be fine. Brian just quit the band, don't you get that? He left you guys because you're all shitty friends that didn't supported him when he needed it the most. You guys practically ruined his life. Don't you see? You didn't just lost your lead guitarist, you lost one of your best friends"

I stare up at her, blinking slowly, realizing that she's right. In some way, we all fucked Brian's life. His entire life. We weren't there for him. We NEVER were there for him. If we were, then we would've noticed something, but we didn't. We left him alone.

"But, what were we supposed to do? I mean, we tried to get them together, but Michelle drops that bomb on us" I say, remembering plotting with Johnny in New York about getting them together. & the plan seemed to be working, until Michelle ungracefully told us she was pregant. "I don't know what else to do. Tell me..." I look at her pleading. "Please, tell me what to do"

"It's not in our hands, Zack. it's Brian's decision" She says a lot calmer now. "I'm sorry for my outburst. It's just... it pissed & scared me at the same time when Val told me that she knew. & that Matt told her. I mean, how could he do that to Brian?" She says, closing her eyes, almost as if she was in pain.

"But she's his wife" I try to stick up for my other friend.

"I know. But... she's Michelle's sister, Zack. You know as well as I do that it's just a matter of time before she tells her everything & then all hell will break loose. You know it, Zacky" She says & that seems to click everything for me.

No matter what promise Val made to Matt, she was gonna tell. She may not be a snitch, but she was gonna spill it out to Michelle sooner or later. It was like a time bomb... we just had to wait for it to explode.

I just nod, settling my head back on her chest, no longer watching the TV. NOW I'm worried. What if we lost Brian forever? Like forever-forever. I can't let that happen. I have to do something... but what?!?!? What can I do to get Brian back?

& all of a sudden, it's like my little light bulb suddenly blinds me from my brilliant idea. I know exactly what I have to do.

"You're still Annabelle's maid of honor, right?"

Brian's POV

"Hey, Dad" I greet my Dad, walking into his house.

I had to escape from the madhouse that I call home. I was tired of Michelle yelling at me about what the fuck I was talking about & slamming doors. Not my scenario & not exactly what I need right now.

"Hey, son. What's up?" He asks from where he's strumming his guitar on the couch. "You look like hell. Troubles with the wife?" He asks absentmindly, not once loosing his rhythm.

"More than you know" I mutter, making sure he doesn't hear me. I sit next to him & throw my head back, closing my eyes just to forget everything. I just want to forget.

Forget the betrayal.

Forget my fucked up life.

Forget Michelle.

Forget Annabelle.

Just... forget.

"Are you ok?" My dad asks me, & the concern in his voice it's like it triggers something inside of me, & I just snap.

"No, I'm not ok. I haven't been ok for nearly 3 year now, ok? I am a miserable man that hates his life" I nearly shout at him, but I'm in a roll so I don't stop to consider that this is my Dad I'm talking to. "I'm married to a woman I don't even care for, who's expecting my baby to top it all off, a baby I'm not fucking sure I'm ready for. The woman I love is thousands of miles aways, doing God knows what & getting married to a guy that could never love her the way I love her, making her happy, while I'm stuck living a life I loathe" I say, feeling angry tears on my eyes. "I have the shittiest friends in the whole world & I can't bare to look at them in the eyes right now, so that leaves me unemployed cuz I'm not returning to that fucking band ever. So No, I'm not okay" I say, trying to catch my breath, my chest rising rapidly.

Wow... it felt good to let it all out. To just let it out!

I turn to see my father with an impassive look.

"So..." He starts. "You finally realized that you love Annabelle" He says. I gasp at him. What does he mean, finally? As he can read my mind, he continues. "Oh, come on, Syn. You can't fool me. I knew you loved her. I don't know how you didn't figured it out sooner" He says, standing to place his guitar on the guitar stand next to the TV set.

I can't believe I didn't notice it sooner either & I kicked my ass mentally every day for not noticing it sooner. I mean, I always knew I felt something strong for her. Something that I had mistakenly taken for brother love. But in the end, it was just love. & it took me to almost lose her for me to finally notice that I couldn't live without her. Yet, when I have her, I keep losing her. What the fuck is wrong with me?!?

"Brian, you aren't happy. I can see that" My dad's voice snaps me out of my trance. "& it hurts me to see you so unhappy with the way your life is right now, son. I don't like to see you sad or frustrated cuz that's just not you" He syas, patting my back. "This is no life, son"

"I don't know what to do, dad. I just... I feel so lost" I say, swallowing back tears that are threating to spill.

"I can't tell you what to do, Brian. I wish I could, but you're a grown man. You have to make you're own decisions. I just want you to be happy" He says, & i swallow.

"I need her. She's my happiness. She's everything to me. I feel like I can't breathe without her. I can't do anything knowing she's not mine... knowing she's with someone else" I say, plopping back down on his couch & resting my head on my hands. "But I can't just walk away. I'm going to be a father. I may not love Michelle, but I can't just walk away from her like that"

"I know it's tough, Brian, but I think that at some point in life, you gotta be selfish. Do you really want to raise a baby in an environment where there's no love between the parents? How do you think that child will turn out? How do you think that child is gonna feel?"

Somehow, I can see where my Dad is coming from. But I just can't. I can't walk away from that baby. I don't want it to grow in 2 homes, like I did. Yes, I love Suzy, but what kid doesn't want the perfect family? What kid doesn't want both of their parents together? I know I wanted that. That's why I can't be selfish. Not right now.

"I made my bed, dad. Now I have to lay on it. I had a million & 1 chances to have Belle & I didn't seize the opportunity. I didn't do it. So now I have to deal with the consecuences" I say, standing up & getting ready to leave.

"I just hope that by you doing this, doesn't make you resent that baby, Brian" He says & I walk away.

I hope so too.