Wake Me From the Dead

It was not even mid afternoon and yet the sky had dimmed into a murky grey, and filtering through the dense air were the sounds of mortar fire and gun shots. They were too far away to be of any immediate danger, as the two were presently walking away from the deadly resonance but instinctively Hatter pulled her closer, letting her scent wash over him in a rose tainted wave. And he was almost glad that she had lied to him about how far it still was to her home, because he didn’t want this moment to end just yet. They were out of reach of the killing, the pain that everyone else felt and Hatter could not help but wonder what he would do after this moment had passed. He would inevitably have to go back to his shop, where orders would be waiting for him to fill; orders that boys were sneaking around into the swells of death and destruction to stop. But where would Hatter be if he couldn’t lay in the arms of danger one more night, playing both sides against each other and benefiting from whoever was strongest at any given moment. It was not a guarantee that he would ever return to find Alice, in fact that was the lesser bet since the fighting had gotten increasingly worse these past few months. He almost regretted this pounding that his heart was feeling, that had nothing to do with its need to pump blood to the rest of his body. The girl didn’t need this now - a boy throwing himself at her when there was a good possibility she could lose him in an instant.

Their world was a dismal one, not one of those idealistically beautiful places that children read about in their fairy tales. They could not just fall in love at first sight and expect to be happy because there were too many forces pulling them in different directions; her parents, the resistance for him, and yet Hatter looked at the sky for a moment and felt like something was changing there. There was the electric buzzing of their bodies touching, mingled with the fear for their own lives, being where they were. Maybe they were the real casualties of rebellion - young lovers who never got a chance to know each other’s names because their lives and their worlds were so fleeting. There was nothing that Hatter could say to the girl that could make her understand the gravity of their situation, although they both knew they felt something in this instant that they shouldn’t. How could two people find each other among this rubble and expect to be given a chance to make things work? Their lives were not fair, this world was not fair and these two children had been forced to grow up too quickly.

They had not been given a chance to live out any kinds of dreams before their worlds had been shattered and thrown together in the shambles of broken buildings and busted glass. But this adventure might teach them both something they never thought they would learn and Hatter was glad for her company and the warmth her small body provided him. But then he forced her into this teary mess, because he stupidly asked why she had been out by herself in this treacherous town that had once been her safe haven. He watched her carefully, listening to the breaking in her tiny voice, and pulling her closer into his musky embrace, against the hard sinewy muscles of his torso he hugged her like they had been lovers once. He would break her heart, or she would break his by crying like this where there was every reason in the world for her to. And Hatter wanted to comfort her and tell her that everything was going to be okay, but he couldn’t, because even in his world things were not safe, were not fine. Nothing was certain in this lie ridden era they resided in; they had learned the lessons of adults, but they were still children and could not be expected to act as though they were not every moment of their new lives.

There was a desperate quality to Hatter’s voice, a begging that had to make Alice realize he was just as scared and weak as she was, but he had to hide it because he was a man and society told him it was necessary. Stopping their forward motion, although not at all to embarrass the girl, Hatter bit his lower lip slightly and used his thumb to wipe away a stray tear. ”Please don’t cry.” He didn’t know how to make her feel better, couldn’t kiss those quickly swelling eye lids because they had known each other mere minutes. But he wanted to, had the overwhelming urge to do something, anything to make her feel better. So he straightened again and wrapped her in his embrace so that she could be protected from the onlookers that did not exist, as they pushed forward, ever closer, towards her house.

”My name is David Hatter, but most people just call me Hatter. I guess I should ask you what yours is.” There was an almost mocking in his voice, although he did not intend to make fun. It just seemed an entirely strange situation for them to be in. He wanted to know her, he just didn’t want to get so close that he would miss her when she was gone.