A Whole Lot of Jackass

"Remind me again why I'm doing this." I said, staring throught the mesh fence at the aligator on the other side.
"Cause your the fastest one if it comes after you." I groaned and walked over to the rest of the guys who were waiting for me to start.
"You ready?" Jeff asked.
"I guess so." I put my foot into Johnny's hand and he gave me a boost over the fence where our new animal expert Manny Puig stood waiting for me. "So what do I do if it comes for me, like qiuck?"
"Don't make any sudden movements towards it or any loud noises." I nodded and took the information in.
"Right no jumping or screaming, got it." I walked over towards the beast that stood staring at me.
"Okay, so it's just, 'Hi I'm Johnny Knoxville and welcome to Jackass'." Jeff said from his place behind the fence.
"Hang on, why am I saying his name?" I frowned.
"It adds effect." Was the answer I got so, wanting to get this over with, I glanced over at Kosicks with the camera and started the intro.
"Hi I'm Johnny Knoxville and welcome to Jackass!" As I finished the aligator snapped and came towards me, so I took no chances and bolted towards the fence pulling myself up and letting Knoxville catch me on the other side.
"Ahhh, was my little Foxxy scared?" I put on a brave face and slapped the back of his head as he held me still.
"Never, I just wanted to keep my legs that's all!" He giggled and set me down on the floor as we set off to film Pontius's bit with the Corcodile's. Excellent.
"Got yourself an admirerer have you?" For a second I thought it was Stephanie coming to bother me again, but then Lauren showed her face and stood beside me.
"Not you as well! Why is everyone saying that?" I heard her giggle and saw her cross her arm from the corner of my eye.
"Oh come on the way Johnny looks at you is in pure admiration, and Steve-O just fancies the pants off you."
"Shut up, Johnny's married and Steve-O's a friend. How many time am I going to have to say that?" I said trying to get the message through before she pushed it to far. We had just become good friends and I didn't want to ruin that.
"Like that's ever stopped you before!" My mouth dropped in shock and my head swung to meet hers.
"I'm sorry, what?" I shouted, making her jump. "Who you been talking to?"
"What? No one! I said 'That's never stopped anyone before', you know what men are like." I calmed down thinking I must have heard wrong, but I still needed a little time by myself.
"Yeah unfortuatly I do." With that I left her stood there staring at me walking away.

"Hey, you okay?" I looked up from the concrete ground I had been staring at and focused my teary eyes on a rough outline of a person. "Oh Low?" It wasn't until the person said that, that I relised it was Jeff. He walked over and sat himself down next to me, putting his arm around my shoulder and letting me cry on his shoulder. "It's okay."
After about 5 minutes of my crying and Jeff's crap jokes I finally lifted my head off his shirt and whiped the smudged make up from under my eyes.
"So what's up?" He asked looking, trying to make eye contact with me.
"Nothing, it's just, been a long few months." I lied, all I wanted to do was forget what happened and move on.
"I know it's nothing Low, Lauren's worried about you. She said you freaked out and ran off at something she said, she wants to say sorry." I looked at him for the first time.
"She shouldn't be sorry, it was me over reacting at something she didn't even say." Jeff looked at me as to carry one. "She said 'what stops a married person going after someone, and I thought she'd heard and was implying..." Jeff started to nod his head before whispering.
"Derek...You need to get over him Low, he's keeping you from doing so much." Jeff said, this was once a regular conversation but they faided out as the months went by.
"But I can't get over what he did, he trailed me along for 5 years, I was waiting for him to propose and then to find out he's married! I could barely stand to look at myself for weeks."
"But it wasn't your fault Low, hell, if the guy what was good for him he would have married you in a second." Smilling, I turned to Jeff and gave him a hug, he was always the one to cheer me up.
"You coming out, Dimitry wants to know where his camera girl is."
"Sure, has chris done his bit yet?" I said as Jeff got up, then grabbed my hand to help me up.
"Yeah, he's bummed you missed it, he nearly got his dick bitten off so it was exciting times." I giggled and let Jeff lead the way back to the guys.
"Hey babe, what's got you down?" I heard one of them asked as their hands went around me and laid my head on their shoulder.
"Nothing Steve-O, I'm fine." He pulled his head back and pulled an 'are you sure' face. "I'm fine, trust me!" I laughed at his hesitation but none the less he rubbed the top of my head and gave me a kiss on the cheek before letting me go and casualy standing beside me.
"Hey you missed my bit!" I laughed and looked at Chris who was coming over to us.
"I know, sorry."
"Oh it's alright, I guess I can forgive you." He gave me a hug as well and then pulled me over to where all the guys were stood, as well as Stephanie and Lauren.
"Hey, I'm sorry if something I said upset you I really am." I laughed at how nervous she was.
"It's fine it wasn't anything you said it was me just thinking...stuff." Shaking my head, I looked up at her smiling .
"Cool, well I hope your okay. I'll see you tomorrow yeah?" She smiled.
"Yeah." We hugged each other and then she started to walk away before I shouted of her. "Wait, are you not coming the next bit?" She turned walking backwards slowly.
"What is it?"
"Spermathon." Oh God I'm going to have to sit through that! I thought to myself.
"Erm...no thanks," She giggled, "but I think Stephanie is going!"
"Alright bye!"
"Bye." I shouted and turned around to find the rest of the guys heading towards the vans. "Thanks for telling me!" I ran to catch up as we headed to the Sperm Hospital thing.

"Here we have our beautiful nurse Stephanie Hodge, she's going to be helping us out today." Johnny introduced as the rest of us got out the van. I watched her as she giggle and acted all giddy to all the guys that talked to her. The 'competitors' for the Spermathon were: Knoxville, Dimitry, Kosicks, Wee Man, Preston and Chris. All the rest of the cast and some of the crew had went back to the hotel.
"And our second beautiful nurse, Lowri Foxx." He said as I passed him with a little nurse cap on.
"If you think I'm touching your Sperm, you got another thing coming!" Johnny laughed and started to walking into the hospital beside me, leaving a semi-angry Stephanie stood in the car park.
"Okay! Up first is Kosicks." Stephanie shouted while we all sat in the waiting room, she held a clip board in her left had and a small plastic beaker in the other. Kosicks slowly got up and followed Stephanie to a small room around the corner. I sat on a chair between Knoxville and Dimitry, feeling very uncomfortable about what exactly was going on.
"I can't believe you guys are actually doing this." I said with a disgusted face.
"What? It's not like you havn't done it!" Pontius shouted from the seat across from me.
"I don't think were in the right position to be talking about my sex life. Thank you!"
"Oh but a plane full of people is fine!"
"Shut up Johnny! Go fuck yourself." I burst out laughing at my own joke, that nobody else got, I slowly calmed down and pouted.
"Oh not the pout!" Johnny shouted looking away as I moved closer to him, trying to intimidate him. I didn't work though as he grabbed my hips and got me on the floor, starting to wrestle with me.
"Ow my ribs, I can't breathe, too heavy!" He whispered as I fell on top of him.
"Are you saying I'm fat!"
"Well not exactly, but you are a little on the porky side." My mouth fell open and I started to hit him. He covered his face with his hands to protect him before I was pulled off him by Preston.
"Knoxville your up." He continued to laugh as he messed up my hair and ran round the corner before I could go after him.
The rest of the day comtinued like this, and in the end it was Rick who won with the biggest Sperm count. It was funny, as the guys who had kids had the lowest count. And after it was all over we headed back to the hotel for a 'relaxing night in'.