A Whole Lot of Jackass

September 2003

Three weeks after that night I was rushing around the bedroom shoving mare crap into my bag as Colin sat peacefully down stairs watching TV and having a beer. It must be nice having to problems and being able to have a drink at 11 in the morning. I pulled on any clothes that were lying around and left the room mith my bag on my shoulder.
"Colin I'm going out to meet Lauren for lunch Okay!" I shouted, running sown the stairs as fast as I could.
"When now?" I heard Colin shout back, slightly confused.
"Yeah is that alright?" I kept my voice raised as I yanked some shoes on to my feet.
"Sure." He frowned. "Is everything okay though, you seem scattered?" I jerked my head up to look at him while trying the laced of my converse.
"Me? Yeah I'm fine. Just late-I mean for lunch." I puffed, standing up.
"Okay." He sighed, still unsure but I plastered a smile on my face to reasure him. "Be careful." He said and kissed my goodbye.
"I will, bye." I rushed, pecking him on the lips again.
"Bye." I slammed the door after hearing his reply and litrally ran towards my car, chucking my bag in the backseat and then jumping in the drivers seat, starting up the engine as fast as possible. I reversed out of the gates, letting them shut after me, and then sped towards the city.

"Okay I'm here! What's up?" Lauren asked, walking quite quickly into the small restaurant and sitting sown in the seat opposite me.
"I need to talk to you." I said, more deery than normal. I noticed Lauren looking at me weird as she shrugged the jacket off her shoulders.
"Wow, it must be serious." She giggled slightly.
"It's not funny Lauren, this is actually something out of my hands." I felt my breathing speed up as my chest got tighter.
"Oh honey I was only joking. Really what's up?" I stayed scilent as the thought of speaking made me shiver.
"Lowri what's wrong? Is it Colin? What did he do? I swear to God if it's anything like that scum bag ChadI'll-"
"No! No! It's nothing like that with Colin." I objected, finding my voice. "It's..." I trailed of, feeling the tightness again.
"Low come on you can tell me." She whispered as my body began to shake with sobs. "Lowri please you're scaring me! What's wrong?" Her voice raising with the panic I was causing her.
"I'm Late." I said through chairs causing Lauren to become confused once again.
"Late? Late for what?"
"I...I think I'm pregnant." I stuttered, under my breath. I saw her mouth 'oh' and lean back in her chair, scilent.
"Is it Colin's?" She asked after a few minutes.
"Of coarse it Colin's! What's that suppose to mean?" I shouted, slightly offended.
"Nothing? I was just trying to work out why your so upset...it seems like a positive thing."
"Positive? Lauren I might have a living thing inside of me, who's father has only been dating me for 18 months." I cried harder.
"Exactly. It's not as if you had a one night fucking stand! It's with a guy you love and he love's you back." She shouted. "And all this 'might', you don't even knw for sure yet?" Lauren squeaked.
"No. That's why I called you. I wanted you to be there when I took the test. I don't feel like worrying Colin because he's really busy at the moment...he doesn't need me messing that up. So would you?" I asked, smiling at her a little.
"I would love to Low." She grinned and stood up straight away.
"Where you going?" I asked, cheering up and laughing a little.
"To the store. I can't wait around when there's peeing to be done!" She yelled and pulled me up from my seat, taking my bag in her own hand and running out the door. I laughed louder now ran to catch up to her.

*Lauren's Apartment*

"Jesus! How long does it take for one women to pee?" Lauren joked outside the door. Since getting the test and arriving at Lauren's, she had managed to cheer me up loads but there was still that grey cloud hanging over me that suggested Colin wouldn't want the kid, if there was one, and would leave. The thought mixed with the anticipation was making me want to puke my guts up.
"Will you shut up I'm trying to concentrate!" I shouted through the bathroom wall.
"Well if you're not done in the next minute I'm coming in there and doing it for you!" Finally I was done and I put the lid on the test and threw it in the sink before standing up and pulling up my pants.
"Okay, I'm done."
"Ooh what is it? What is it? Am I an Antie?" Lauren squealed, bouncing though the bathroom door.
"It doesn't say yet, you have to give it two minutes." I mummbled. Lauren's hand went over my shoulder and rubbed my back softly.
"Don't worry about it everything will be fine, baby or no baby." She smiled and pulled me out of the bathroom, after all, a watched pot never boils.

Two minutes later I walked into the bathroom and closed my eyes while tilting my head towards the sink. After a few seconds of building up the courage, I opened my eyes and stared at the blue dot on the test. Tears erupted in my eyes but I couldn't tell whether it was from joy or disappointment.
"So...What is it?" Lauren whispered from her bedroom. I turned towards her before muttered the two little words.
"It's positive." My hands came up and covered my mouth as me eyes stayed staring at the test which left me with a baby in my tummy.
"And now to tell Colin." Lauren said, coming to my side and giving me a reasuring hug.

I stayed at Lauren's a little longer, just thinking, I had went over my situation one hundred times and finally came to the conclusion that is wasn't all that bad. As Lauren said, It isn't as if the kids from a one night stand. I love Colin and if he truly loved me back he would stick by my side and we could even carry on with the wedding, he would see it as a gift like I had come to see it. I picked up my keys and headed home so I could announce the news, but that little rain cloud was still looming.

*At Home*

"Hey Baby, I was beginning to get worried. Did you have a nice time?" Colin smiled as he met me in the kitchen, a ciggarette in one hand and a beer in the other.
"Erm yeah..." I smiled fakly and set my bag down. "Listen, I need to talk to you. Why don't we sit down?" I said, the smile dropping. Colin nodded, unsure, and put his ciggarette out in the ash tray after gesturing towards the living room. I went ahead and heard him follow me in before taking the seat beside me on the couch.
"What is it gorgeous?" I frowned and put my head down, all the while trying to think of the best way to tell him.
"I'm pregnant." I said loud enough for him to hear. I lifted my eyes to his face to see a wide eyed, stunned expesion. Whether that was good or not I didn't know.
"Pregnant? As in a baby?" He asked.
"No as in a puppy. Of coarse as in a baby!" I joked, trying to lighten the situation.
"Oh my God." He whispered, looking at the walls instead of me. "Are you sure?" Colin asked and I nodded in reply. "How long have you known?"
"Just a couple of hours...I went to Lauren's to take the test." I admitted.
"Why didn't you take it here?"
"I was scared you'd freak out." I said, cowering slightly.
"Oh baby I wouldn't ever, it's...the best news." He said, smiling finally.
"Really?" I asked, all my nerves melting away suddenly.
"Yeah. Aww baby..." I grinned as he lent closer to me and kissed me pationatly, pulling me on top of him.
"We're going to have a baby." I grinned, over the moon, as I rested my forhead against Colin's.
"Yeah we are." I ran my hand through his short brown hair before placing my lips back on to his roughly, pushing him back on to the couch.