You Lost Me, You Left Me

It had been about a month since I had returned to Tempe and I was almost over mine and Nathan’s break-up. I realized that I was only dating him to try and fill the emptiness in my heart. The only person that could fill that though was John.

I was at the locally owned clothing store I worked when my phone rang. It was dead in the store so I went ahead and answered it.

“Hey, Nick.”

“How’d you know it was me?” The voice from the other side said and I could just picture the ginger boy pouting.

“There’s this crazy new invention called caller id.” I said and I heard Halvo’s cackle in the background. “Hey, am I on speaker, Nick?”

“Yeah. I said I was going to call you and the rest of the guys wanted to talk to you so I just put my phone on speaker. Say hi to Parks everyone.” Nick said and I heard the chorus of “hey” from Andrew, Justin, and Halvo.

“Hey guys.” I said while rolling my eyes.

“We have a surprise for you Miss America.” Eric said.

“I’m technically not Miss America anymore, Halvo. My reign is over.”

“You’ll always be Miss America in our hearts, Parker-Blaine.” I heard Justin yell from somewhere in the background.

“Aww you guys are so cheesy. So what’s the surprise?” I asked.

“Well your favorite band is coming to Arizona and we got you backstage passes.” Nick said.

“N’SYNC is on a reunion tour and they’re coming to Arizona?! And you got me backstage passes?! You guys are the best!” I jokingly yelled into the phone.

“Hey! Not funny Parks!” Andrew, Justin, and Halvo yelled.

“I was talking about us. Rocket is coming to Arizona. I was going to give you backstage passes so you could hang out with us afterwards but I’m not sure I will after the N’SYNC comment.” Nick said.

“I was just joking Nicholas. Anyway you can’t say no to my pretty face.” I smirked even though he couldn’t see it.

Nick sighed and said, “You’re right, I can’t. Damn you and your good looks Parker-Blaine. Hey the guys are going to go get food so they want to say bye.”

“Bye Parks. Love you!” The other three members of A Rocket To The Moon yelled into the phone.

“Bye guys! Love you too. See you guys soon!” I said back.

“Hey Halvo I’m going to stay and talk to Parks. Get me a sandwich and bring it back for me.” I heard Nick say from the other end of the phone.

“Why do I have to?” Eric complained.

“Because you’re my bitch.” Nick said and I immediately started laughing.

I heard Eric mumble something inappropriate under his breath but agree to get Nick a sandwich.

“Ok, I’m back and you’re not on speaker anymore.” Nick’s voice said.

“Ok. So when are guys going to be in Arizona?” I questioned.

“Next Tuesday. We perform at 6:30 so we’ll basically get to hang out with you guys all night.”

“Great… wait, you guys? You’re inviting The Maine aren’t you? Which means John will be there.” I said as a sick feeling instantly came to my stomach.

Nick sighed and said, “I can’t just not invite them, Parks. They’re some of our best friends.”

“I know. I just… I try to avoid John as much as possible.”

“He’s been real messed up this past year and a half. You know that, right? It nearly killed him when you left without saying goodbye. Then he hated it when he had to sit in the audience watching you being crowned Miss America but knowing he couldn’t go backstage to congratulate you afterwards like the rest of us did. Ever since you got back to town everything’s just worse. It’s one thing for you to be in New York and not talking to him, but for you to be in the same town and still not talking to him is even worse.”

“It’s so hard Nick.” I said as tears threatened to spill from my eyes. It amazed me that John still had this effect on me after a year and a half.

“He loves you Parker-Blaine. I know he was a huge dick but we all make mistakes. He’ll never be able to make this right if you don’t let him.”

“Stop trying to play matchmaker because I never asked you to.” I snapped and then instantly regretted it. “I’m sorry Nick. I shouldn’t have snapped at you. I’ve just been an emotional basket case since moving back.”

“I understand. I just really wish you would give John another chance. Neither one of you guys will be happy until you do.” Nick said.

“I have to go now because customers just walked in. Bye, see you next Tuesday.” I said while trying to avoid Nick's words.

Nick just sighed because he knew I was avoiding what he said but he didn’t push the issue as he just said, “Ok, bye Parks.”

With that I hung up the phone and went to help the customers. Nick had achieved his goal though because his words stayed in my head all day.