I Brought You Bullets, You Brought Me Love

As we left school, Frank and E’ma were still talking about their awesome body art and piercings. They seemed pretty amused, if I shall say. I was looking over at my brother, who was blushing at something Alicia said; I smiled towards him, although he couldn’t see me. Then, I remembered what I thought when me and Mikey first met Alicia; I had thought I would never find someone who would love me or care for me. Oh, how wrong I was!
I looked at my boyfriend, who was randomly laughing at something my best friend had said, and I smiled; his giggles were like tiny bells ringing harmoniously to an unheard beat that rang inside my chest. I heard his soft voice go with the sweet breeze that passed through us, lifting my hair and wrapping it around my milk-toned face; yes, I’m that pale, if you’re asking. His voice was like silk going through my ears, caressing my insides as it passed and melting me; unconsciously, I leaned a bit closer to him, making him look at me. When he saw me staring sweetly, his lips parted even more and he smiled widely at me; I smiled back, and then looked at where we were heading: the mall. Of course Ray and Bob would take us to the mall!
Ray and Bob were more flamboyant than what met the eye; for example, they loved shopping. If they got inside the tiniest of the stores, they could be there for hours! And now imagine them in big stores, in a big mall; it’s to go crazy for, trust me.
We got inside the mall, Ray and Bob instantly running to a clothes shop, and I shook my head and rolled my eyes, only then noticing Frank had stopped me and was standing in front of me, claiming my attention.
- Yeah, sugar? – I asked, finally giving him the attention he so wanted.
- I was just asking why you didn’t have any tattoos; you seem a fan of art, and, well, I figured you’d like some body art as well… - he told me, smiling sweetly; I, on the other hand, made a grimace.
- Needles – I said simply, softly shaking at the mere mention of those life stealing objects.
- What about’em? – He asked, really confused; oh, yeah, I forgot to mention before I was deadly afraid of those shinny and sharp objects.
- I can’t stand needles; I have phobia of them – I replied, as he went back to my side and we started walking again.
- Oh… - he said, an understanding feeling crossing his beautiful features; then, of course, E’ma had to embarrass me.
- You should’ve seen him, when we were younger! Once, in a class, we were recoiling blood, and he fucking screamed worst than a girl! – She said; Frank started laughing softly and I used my free hand to hide my face.
-E’ma! Why do you always embarrass me? – I asked, sighing deeply, in a playful tone, although I was asking the most legit question ever; she always embarrassed me, there was no way she wouldn’t do it.
- Oh, I remember one time he screamed like that, in the doctor; it was fucking funny! – Mikey helped her, making everyone else laugh a little at me.
- Oh, for God’s sake! Is it ‘embarrass Gerard’ day? – I asked, my face filled with a crimson color, my embarrassment showing off to everyone.
- Hum, yeah, apparently – Ray replied, making everyone laugh; I rolled my eyes and let out a simple sigh.
- Oh, come on! – I said softly, and then felt an arm wrap around my waist; I looked over and it was Frank, who was snuggling to my sides and smiling sweetly at me.
I surrounded his shoulders with my arm and kissed his forehead, thanking God for the amazing boyfriend Frank had turned to be; well, we were only dating for one day, but he sure as hell was a sweetheart, since we had started.
- Guys! We gotta go to that store, please! – Ray pleaded with his voice girlish and whining as he pulled Bob into a ‘Hot Topic’, all of us dragged behind those two shopaholics.
- As if we had any other choice – Alicia whispered, lightening the mood a little bit more and making everyone laugh a little bit.
We got inside the store, and it wasn’t all that bad, after all; me and Frankie got each other a black The Misfits’ tee-shirt [different, if you’re wondering] and we ended up having a good time, talking and just randomly visiting every store that Ray and Bob got us into; we forgot about school, so we skipped the whole day, without even caring.

After leaving the mall, Ray took us all into his place, and, since it was a Friday, we all called our parents, and ended up staying in Ray’s place. When there, he took us all to his attic so we could just chill out, watch some movies and simply hang around each others. We soon started playing ‘Truth Or Dare’, everyone starting to choose ‘Dare’ instead of ‘Truth’.

- So, Gee, it’s your turn! – Mikey said to me, a smile plastered on his face. – Truth or Dare, bro?

- You should know by now, Mikey; dare, all the way – I smirked at him, who laughed for, like, one second, and then got quiet, thinking of something; when he got the idea on what I should do, his whole face lit up, and his eyes had a mysterious shine on them.

- Gee, oh, Gee… I dare you to go on the top of the roof and call everyone, saying you’ll kill yourself – he said, smiling; I thought the idea quite stupid, but I still had to do it.

I showed him a grimace, softly kissing Frank’s forehead, and then leaving through the window, grabbing onto the roof for dear life, so I wouldn’t fall; when I was already there, I turned to the side of the street, watching the guys panting down there, looking at me expectantly.

- Is this what you always want me for? – I screamed, looking pissed and hurt; when I wanted to, I could put up some act! – But does anyone notice? DOES ANYONE CARE? – I screamed even louder, as some people started to amount around Ray’s house; I took an hesitant step forward, leaning closer to the edge of the roof, scaring not only the people that had gathered there, but also my friends. – If this is my fate, then let it be! – I screamed again, bringing my other foot towards the edge; there was one little thing that went wrong, though.

It had started raining; the drops falling from the sky like little salty tears fell from a child’s face when their candy got stolen or fell to the ground; it was like the sky was begging me to stop, even before my foot had touched the wet roof. It was, though, the clouds’ tears that made it happen; if the roof was dry, I wouldn’t have fallen.

I heard gasps and screams as I slipped and fell onto the concrete in front of Ray’s house; I had fallen on my back, and I couldn’t move. I was pretty sure I had broken something, even if it was only my ribs.

The rain was still falling, and soon I heard thunders; everything was black to me, though. I couldn’t see a thing.

I could hear people asking if I was okay, my brother calling an ambulance and sobbing, Frank crying while lying on my chest; oh, my Frankie. I never meant to make you cry. I didn’t want to fall. No, please, stop crying. It was not intentional; I just wanted them to be scared. I never meant this to happen. I wish I could say ‘I love you’ one last time, to you. But it’s getting harder to hear you, baby! Don’t go just yet; I have so much left to tell you! I wanna wrap my arms around your tiny beautiful body and tell you I’m okay; I’m still here. I wanna give you a big kiss, and make you forget about my fall. I knew now what the clouds were telling me with their cries; “don’t do it, don’t do it, don’t do it!”. I had done it, though; and look where it got me.

“GEE! Are you listening to m-me? You ca-an’t lea-ave me, Gee!”

Yes, Mikey, I hear you; no, I won’t leave you. I promised you I wouldn’t; damn! I promised myself I wouldn’t leave you until you were fucking married. After all you’ve gone through, I just can’t let go of you, baby brother; I know you’re hurting, but I’m still here, I’m okay. I promise. It doesn’t even hurt anymore!

I started to hear an ambulance in the far distance; it would be such a good start for a song. Yes, that’s what I’m gonna do, if I ever wake up again. I’ll write my wishes, my pain, my rises and falls; and I’ll sing them for the world. They will hear my voice, and they will know my secrets. I will not give up, and I will survive; I will exist.

“Why, Gee? Why?”

Oh, Frankie, not again. It wasn’t on purpose! I love you too much to leave you, you should know that. I would never do that to you, baby! I love you, I love you, I love you…

“I… I love you” I said, finally able to let that tiny simple, yet so meaningful, sentence slip through my numb lips; it was both for Frank and my brother. “Never forget that.”

And, with that, I went off.

Was I gonna wake up?