Early Mourning

I'm surprised Dane actually came.

Two months ago he would have never agreed. Hell two months ago he'd stumble into my work place looking half dead. Though he still looked pretty skinny, he was more healthier. His skin didn't have that natural glow just yet, but there was moments when it was visible, he was getting there. It's weird to see him change before my eyes. Part of me is unsure on whether I like it or not. I mean I'm glad he isn't screwing himself over mentally and physically anymore. But the other part is nervous.

I don't understand completely what's going through his head. Dane doesn't give me feedback if things are changing for the better or if they're worse, there are no signs pointing in either direction.

Judging by the fact that he's going out more, it has to be for the better right?

I like Dane, I accept that. We're friends I suppose, friends who don't need a solid sign that we're more than just acquaintances. I know now that I don't need to have a sit down and ask moment to come to that conclusion. Doing that is not something Dane would do.

Just standing next to me and listening to Enrique and James rant to each other is though. And there's this strong urge inside me to reach out and touch him. I don't ignore it.

My had rest on the small of his back and Dane's face stays in-tune with the couple conversation. I just leave my hand there. He hasn't pushed it away right?

That's a good sign right?

This is is weird for me. I haven't been with some since high school, which feels like ages ago instead of a measly four years. It's so strange. And I don't even think I've ever found out how hold Dane is.

"Dane how old are you?" I wonder out loud and the conversation stops. Both James and Enrique stare at the boy beside me, curious as well. All of us don't miss the fact that he hesitates and seems to ponder the question himself.

"I'm . . . twenty-one?" He asks himself but nods his head in confirmation.

"Oh my god! Arson's no longer the baby!! No wonder you look so cute!" Enrique squeals nearly tearing off Dane's cheek. Dane says something but neither of us can understand him due to the cooing fag.

Dane slaps his hands away and rubs his sore cheeks. "How old are you guys?" He asks.

"Well, Enrique and I are twenty-three, and Larson is twenty-two," James elaborates. I look at Dane nervously but he just nods his head and steps closer to me. I hold my breath, wrapping my arm around his waist and feeling his warm little body begin to thaw mine. Enrique gives me a knowing glance and James sends a wink.

"I think I need a hair cut. . ." Dane whispers and Enrique slams his head onto the counter, startling all of us.

"Oh my god! About time! I was seriously thinking about sneaking to your house and cutting it while you're asleep! I know just the girl too, we can do it Wednesday!" Enrique cheers. I shoot Enrique a panicked looked because he's suppose to be distracting James Wednesday.

Dane just shakes his head, "I'd rather go by myself, that stalking joke has me scared of you."

"Awe, but I really wanted to get my hair re-dyed," James frowns. Enrique's jaw drops to the floor, he puts a hand over his heart and gasps. "But baby I dye your hair!" He whines. James smiles and wraps an arm around him, pulling his boyfriend closer.

"You promised her that she'd be able to dye it one day, and she still hasn't. Besides I need to make sure that you really don't annoy Dane too much," He smiles. Enrique laughs, tan hands cupping Jame's ivory cheeks and pulling him into a kiss.

I know it might sound rude, but I can never get over the contrast of their skin, James is white as hell while Enrique is super tan. But then again, they go great together.

I look away from them, so they could have their own moment. A wave of heat erupts from my side and I look down to see that Dane is standing closer to me. I smile to myself and wrap my arm around him, watching him play with his fingers.

This boy. . . he's so adorable.