Let the Flames Begin

“Robbie, wake up,” I whispered, nudging her in the shoulder. She grumbled before turning over, her back to me. “C’mon, Robbie,” I said, irritation seeping through my voice. “I’m awake, I’m awake...” she grumbled, tiredly pushing the sleeping bag off of her body. I briefly thought about what it would be like to raise a teenage daughter on your own. I was certainly getting a taste for it myself. And it was extremely frustrating at times. I was much too young for Robbie to be my own child, and she felt more like a sister, anyway.

“Let’s go,” I said now, tugging on her arm. She crawled out of the makeshift shelter and straightened up to stand beside me, fixing up her hair. It was tangled and all out of place, sticking up at weird angles. “Let me fix that,” I said, pulling a brush out of my bag and pulling it slowly and gently through her auburn hair. Even though I'd never admit it, I enjoyed ‘mothering’ her. It made me feel like maybe my life had some sort of significance. Maybe someone would actually miss me if I disappeared.

I pulled her hair gently into a high ponytail with an elastic and she turned to look at me. “Thanks,” she said with a small smile. She’d always been really shy and timid. “I don’t really wanna sing today,” Robbie admitted as we made our way out of the park and onto the street. “Why not?” I asked her, hiking my backpack further up my shoulder.

“There’s so many people around the mall on a Saturday morning,” Robbie said, looking down at her worn shoes. I stopped and placed my hand on her shoulder, willing her to look at me. She glanced up at me with her big green eyes and I instantly saw the fear on her face. “That’s the reason why we’re busking today,” I told her. “More people, more money.”

“Why can’t you just sing?” Robbie whined, looking up at me again. I sighed and started walking again, Robbie trailing behind me. “Because I’m not any good at it, and besides you - ”

I was cut off half-way through my sentence when I was suddenly knocked to the ground. Well that was a surprise. Usually, I was the one knocking people flat on the street. I picked up my things and stood back up again, expecting whoever had knocked me down to have already disappeared, just like I always did.

But when I pushed my hair out of my eyes, I was surprised to see Taylor York standing before me, hands stuffed in his jeans pockets nervously, an apologetic look on his face. As I stared at him, I watched in amusement as he tried to place me. Finally, recognition washed over his face and he opened his mouth to speak.

“Ryder, right?”

“At your service,” I said sarcastically, bowing extravagantly. What the fuck was I doing? Embarrassing myself, as usual. God, I was such an idiot. Taylor chuckled slightly before looking over at Robbie, who was staring at him, mouth agape, eyes wide. “Hi there,” Taylor said awkwardly, giving her a small wave. Robbie blushed before waving back at him. “Hey,” she said. I could tell she was trying to contain her excitement and remain casual (if only for my sake) but she was practically jumping up and down on the spot.

“I’m Taylor,” he said, holding out his hand to Robbie. She hesitantly shook it and giggled. “I’m Robbie,” she replied in her sweet, sing-sing voice. Taylor looked at Robbie and then back at me, obviously trying to make the connection between us. Were we related? I could tell by the look on his face that he was trying to calculate just how young I would have been when I’d given birth if Robbie was my daughter. I had to bite down on my bottom lip to stop myself from laughing out loud.

“Robbie is my little sister,” I explained. “Oh,” Taylor replied, nodding slightly. “I was hoping I’d run into you, Ryder…have I caught you at a bad time?”

“No!” Robbie squealed instantly. I rolled my eyes and shoved her slightly in the shoulder. She smiled widely and waggled her eyebrows suggestively at me, looking between Taylor and myself. “Could I buy you a cup of coffee?” Taylor suggested. I swear I heard Robbie squeal. I stopped myself from rolling my eyes again, not wanting Taylor to think that the gesture was directed at him.

“Uh, I had plans with Robbie today…” I trailed off. Taylor’s face fell. “No, you don’t!” Robbie interrupted, diffusing any awkwardness that had shown signs of appearing. I gave her a warning look. We needed to busk for money to survive. Saturday was our best day, the only day we made a decent amount. Robbie was in serious need of a new jacket. “Robbie,” I told her now. “Where are you gonna go?”

“Oh, don’t worry about me!” she said casually. “I’ll just check out the mall or something.”

“Are you sure?” I asked her, raising my eyebrows. “Yes, completely! I’ll be fine, Ryder.”

“Meet me back at the house, then,” I told her, giving her a knowing look. She knew I meant the makeshift shelter in the park. “Yes, mum,” she said sarcastically, rolling her eyes. I laughed and messed up her hair. “Take care of yourself, squirt.” Robbie laughed and hugged me around the waist before running off. “She’s cute,” Taylor commented once she’d left. “Yeah,” I said, a slow smile spreading across my face. “She’s all I’ve got.”

“It’s sweet, the way you are with her,” he said as we started to walk towards a coffee shop a few blocks over. “Uh, thanks,” I replied, not really knowing how to reply to something like that. When we reached the coffee shop, Taylor and I took our seats at a table outside. I set my guitar case down on the ground beside me, close to my side, as Taylor placed our orders. I’d told him I wasn’t really into coffee, and he’d told me he’d change my mind.

The drink that was served to me in a large ceramic cup was some caramel blend thing and it tasted good. It sounded stupid to say it, even to myself, but I felt like a real freaking grown-up. I also felt like a bit of a princess. Sitting in a coffee shop, drinking out of a ridiculously large ceramic cup. The whole thing seemed so extravagant to me, but for Taylor, it was probably one of the most casual things in the world.

“I thought you said you lived alone,” Taylor said after a moment, breaking the comfortable silence. I almost choked on my drink. That had come out of nowhere. Oh, right. The interview. Robbie.

“I guess I forgot to mention Robbie,” I said with a shrug.

“How old is she?” Taylor asked me.

“Sixteen,” I replied, taking another sip of my delicious, yet completely ridiculous drink.

“That might be a problem…” Taylor trailed off.

“Why?” I asked him, completely confused.

“Because, you know, you can’t just leave a minor back here on her own while you’re away for months on end…”

“Excuse me?”

“Oh yeah, you’re in the band. Did I not say?” Taylor said casually, like it was completely normal.

This time, I did choke on my drink.

I coughed and sputtered and pretty much made an absolute idiot of myself (nothing new) and Taylor started freaking the fuck out which just made things worse. He didn’t know what to do. He was yelling out for a waiter (because, you know, they’re likely to know first aid…) and his face was all twisted in worry. I kept trying to gesture for a glass of water or something but he didn’t understand and just kept yelling. Finally, a person from the next table over thrusted a bottle of water into my hands and I gulped it down quickly. The relief was instant. I immediately turned to thank them profusely.

Taylor stared at me. “Are you okay?” He said after a moment. “Peachy,” I said sarcastically. Taylor let out a shaky laugh and I laughed along with him. “This is a joke, right?” I said after a moment.

“What? Why would I joke about something like this?” Taylor said, sounding almost hurt.

“C’mon…you’ve obviously made a mistake…I’m not a professional guitar player, I don’t even read music. I don’t know the first thing about being in a band and I just don’t think I can do it and what if - ”

“Ryder,” Taylor cut me off. He placed his hand over mine on top of the table. “We chose you for a reason. You’re the best and you’re right for this band. We believe in you. I believe in you.”

I didn’t know what to say. I almost fucking cried for goodness sake! No one had ever cared for me before, let alone believed I could do anything.

“Well, then,” I said. “What now?”

“You sign a shitload of papers,” Taylor replied. I couldn’t help it. I laughed. Taylor York cursing just seemed like one of he funniest things in the world to me. “What?” Taylor asked with a half smile, raising an eyebrow as I continued to laugh. I managed to stop myself from laughing, but couldn’t wipe the smile off my face.

“You have a great laugh,” Taylor said.

“Thanks,” I said, feeling the blush work its way across my features.

“Let’s go,” he said, standing up and leaving a few notes on the table. Shit, I didn’t make that much in a whole week. I stared at the money for maybe a little too long before picking up my guitar case and following after Taylor.

“You always carry your guitar around with you?” he asked me.

“Yeah,” I replied. “I guess I do.”

If I’d been waiting around for a miracle to save Robbie and myself, this was it. And I was going to take it. I’d be stupid not to.