What If I Can't Forget You?

“Alex, I can’t do this anymore. Me crying every time you get drunk, you not understanding or remembering what you even did. I just can’t deal, I think it’d be better for the both of us, especially my physical health. And yours, you can try and work out your alcoholism problems. Maybe go to rehab, I don’t know. But I just want you to know you’ll always be my best friend and I’ll always love you no matter what.” Cam’s voice cracks at the end, but before Alex could respond, or even blink, she ran into Jack’s bunk. To only be greeted by no Jack, so she just laid in his bunk and cried.

“Cam…babe are you okay?!” the older boy’s whisper interrupted her crying, and she looked up at him with tear filled eyes. His heart is breaking into about a million pieces, it hurts to see the girl he loves the most cry.

“No.” is all she says before burying her head into Jack’s shoulder, crying even harder. Preventing his eyes from tearing up, he squeezes his big brown eyes shut and rests his head on her shoulder. “It’ll be okay Cam, I’m here for you, I’ll always be here for you in case you need me.

“Thank you. Thank you for everything Jack. Being my best friend, being there through all my anxiety attacks when the voices talk to me, being my shoulder to cry on, for just being there. I’m starting to really love you. Yeah, I know that’s really soon, but I’d love to be your girlfriend. If you wanted me to.” Cam blushes through her tears, her face turning a light crimson. Jack’s eyes bug out of his head and stares at Cam, but with a wide grin on his face.

“Of course! You do not know how long I’ve waited for this, really. I even loved you before Abby, before everything. Since high school, believe it or not. And I’ve always wanted to do this.” Jack tilts Cam’s chin up slightly so his lips meet hers in a gentle kiss, but turning passionate slowly. His thumbs wipe at her gray tinted tears, making her face porcelain once again.

He could feel her tongue licking at his lips, like giving his bottom lip a massage. Gladly, he gave her entrance to roam his mouth. Spearmint gum would always be in his mouth, so that’s exactly what he tasted like. Cam’s warm tongue now massaging his own felt warm and just all around nice, causing him to make a guttural moan. They stopped kissing for a minute, with Cam’s widespread grin on the black haired boy’s lips.

It soon turned into something more, and yeah, they went all the way on the first night of being together. But I actually meant something. Both willingly did it, and she wasn’t just some casual fuck. Nor would she ever be, because she’s Jack’s girlfriend. But they have yet to tell the rest of the gang. Surely, Abby and Alex wouldn’t be happy about it. Maybe they already knew, Jack can get pretty loud. That’s besides the point though. All that matters is that they love each other, and they clearly do.

The rest of the people would probably think that it was a little to early in their relationship to be saying I love you, but think about it. Jack had loved Cam since high school, even throughout his and Abby’s relationship. In the final days of Alex and Cam’s relationship her bond with Jack had become considerably closer, and not just a brother sister way, more than that.

But a few days later, Cam got sick one morning. Hyperventilating and crying, on the verge of an anxiety attack, and yelled Jack’s name from the bathroom floor.

“I’m scared Jack. I can’t throw up. I want to die please kill me please. Why do I have to have this. I’m terrified.” she’s just a jumbled mess of words, her phobia taking over. Whenever she had anxiety attacks, the voices seem to be present. ‘You’re gonna die Camille. Die. You’re pregnant. Jack will leave you for Abby.”

“GO AWAY!” Cam screams, her eyes clasped shut. Jack knew by now she was shouting at the voices, not him. “Make the voices go away Jack, please. /Please./” she begs, more tears streaming down her face. The bus was probably all awake by now. When they broke the news of their new relationship, Alex stormed off of the bus in a huff.

“Babe I wish I could, but you know I can’t. You’ll have to try, please? For me? Ignore them, they mean nothing, they’re trying to ruin your life. Don’t let the voices win.” she nods whilst taking a big gulp, but he can tell she’s about to throw up once more. Jack quickly grabs her black hair into a pony-tail, taking the hair-tie that was around his wrist and made a bun. Yeah, now he carries around girl stuff on his person. No big deal, but it was for Cam.

More heaving could be heard before he heard before she actually threw up. It may have freaked Jack out bad too, but he just pretended like he was laying in bed with her, watching some movie. Cam was crying harder than she had been before, which was making it even worse. “I have a headache, and I’m seeing stars. Help me up.” she holds her hand out for Jack to take, and pulls the lightweight girl to her feet. As soon as she stands up, the dizziness takes over and she falls into the small counter, hitting her hipbone along the way. Making her pain and crying worse.

“Jack…you used a condom right?” thinking back to that night a few days ago, she honestly could remember him using one…

“OF COURSE I WOULD! I don’t need a child…it’d be nice but not at this age.” after all Jack is only 22 and Cam is only 20! They definitely do not need a child at that age.

“Wait can you even tell if you’re pregnant if it’s only been a few days or…? I’m not really educated in the amount of days you can tell…yeah you know what I mean.” Cam says, looking up at Jack with a quizzical face.

“I have no clue. But I do know that Matt keeps a stash of pregnancy tests in here, so ’scuse me while I look for one.” from Cam’s view she sees his lanky legs bend down to the cabinet to find one. She seriously hoped she wasn’t pregnant.
After a few minutes of rummaging through the cluttered medicine cabinet, he found like 10. “Well I think you should take 3. Just to be positive. Okay? I’ll leave if you want me to, if you want to do this alone.” Jack stands back up and hands the tests over to her, which she takes with a weak smile.

“You don’t have to leave but you can if you want.” but, Jack would rather not see someone pee on a stick so he just tells her that she deserves the privacy of peeing on a stick alone, and then leaves the room.

Once he gets out of the bathroom, Rian is currently the only one sitting out in the lounge. Drinking some home brewed coffee and lighting a vanilla cupcake candle. “Dude you’re so obsessed with candles. But I’m seriously fucked.” Jack sighs and sits down next to Rian, and asks him why he’s ‘seriously’ fucked.

“Well. Cam might be pregnant, because of me. And yeah that’s pretty much it. I don’t need a kid at this age, Rian. If she is I’m definitely not making her get an abortion or give the baby up for adoption. But do you think I could handle it?” disbelief is present in his voice, and he’s starting to get a headache from all the worrying. Before Rian could reply Cam makes her way out of the bathroom without the pregnancy tests.

“It says we have to wait ten minutes. So, I guess we can all wait together. Oh hey Rian!” she probably figured that Rian already knew since Jack was talking to him about it, so they all sit down in a row on the couch, watching some food channel. Which was making her very hungry too, but that really wasn’t the point.

Jack crooks his neck down so his mouth is close to her ear so he can whisper something into it. Cam can feel his hot breath on her ear and it was starting to reall tickle. “Whatever happens today, I’ll never leave you. We’ll do it together. Child or no child. And if we do have a kid we’ll be the best damn parents ever. Plus, since we’re both extremely sexy, it’ll be the sexiest baby in the world.” for the last part he backs away, because Rian was probably too absorbed in seeing Rachel Ray cooking something in under 30 minutes. Cam giggles slightly at what Jack says, but nods.

“You’re right, we can do this no matter what.” she says with a smile and puts her head on Jack’s shoulder.