Resistance Is Useless

LANDON

“Thanks, Alex.” I sighed as I leaned into my boyfriend’s side.
His hand weaved in through my hair while he kissed my temple.
“That’s what boyfriend’s are for,”
“I still can’t believe you hit Jack,” I shook my head.
He huffed and said nothing back, part of which I was thankful for. Alex had been hinting at needing to tell me something since the night of the part, three nights ago. I wanted to know what, but I’ve been with Carson ninety-eight percent of the time. Our alone time had dwindled, and we haven’t had any time to even think about talking, let alone actually talk. Alex had been a little un-easy since the fight. He had started to mope around a little bit, and our parents are never fighting anyone. Scratch that, they aren’t even talking to each other. I would bet that Alex feels responsible. No, I would put money on how responsible he feels. He should feel that way though. It’s not his fault our parents are definitely not right for each other.
“I did it for Carson. He deserved it,” He answered for the millionth time.
I snuggled into him.
“I know, but still...”
“Yeah...” He trailed off. It was silent for a few minutes and I let my eyes slip closed. “Landon, can we talk now?”
“Mmhmm...” I nodded in reply.
“You’re going to have to open your eyes and look at me for this one,”
Slowly, my eyes opened, and I saw Alex staring down at me.
“Okay, I’m listening. You have my full attention,”
“Okay,” He nodded. “Well...you don’t really know a lot about me,”
“Yes...”
“So I figured I’d tell you,”
“Okay, go on,” I stated, gripping his hand tightly in mine.
“I had a brother,” He started. “His name was Tom, and he was older than me. I looked up to him. In a sense, he was like my best friend. We were pretty damn close. Anyway, Tom was depressed and I didn’t know. I didn’t understand that he was hurting so bad, and that I could do nothing to stop it,” He stopped, now staring up at the ceiling. I didn’t really like where this was going, but I hugged myself to Alex’s frame tighter than I was before. “When I was younger, Tom killed himself.”
“W-what?” I whispered.
“He took his own life,” He nearly whispered, looking back down at me now. “He left me here all alone. It hurt like hell. Hell, it still hurts that he did that. Not soon after, my parent’s marriage fell apart. They got divorced, and I stayed with my dad. Jack was there for me, obviously, because we were best friends. Then be became so close that I thought we were like brothers until I realized that there was an attraction there. Jack still is like my brother though, no matter what. I still miss Tom. It’s like a piece of me is missing. I can’t really explain it, no matter how hard I try.” He replied.
“I love you,” I whispered, holding him, and I lifted up to kiss his cheek. I moved my head into the crook of his neck, and closed my eyes.
“I love you too,” He whispered back, still moving his fingers through my hair. “I hate that Tom left me. I can’t...I can’t deal with people walking out of my life. Jack knows that. That’s why he hasn’t left yet. I-I can’t have you walk out either, Landon. You’re too important.”
“Alex... I’m not going anywhere,” I replied.
“Thank you,” He replied before he kissed my forehead. “Thank you for listening to me,”
“You’re welcome,”
Some un-spoken bond had joined us even closer than we have been before. Alex didn’t need to tell me about what had happened with him and his brother. He didn’t have to, but he wanted to. That alone made my heart do over-time. I was so in love with this boy that it wasn’t even funny. I don’t know why, but Alex and I just needed each other. He showed me love, and I showed understanding. I have never been in a proper relationship before. This was all new to me. Foreign, and pleasent all at the same time. I didn’t feel ugly around Alex. I didn’t feel like I was being used. I didn’t feel like some trophy. I felt like me. I could actually be myself around him. That was the best feeling ever.
“I’m just glad that I stayed.”
“Hmmm?” I hummed, looking up at him.
“I’m glad that you didn’t run away.”
“What makes you think that I would possibly do that?”
“Well, you are Landon. You are pretty unpredictable,”
I laughed and pressed a chaste kiss to his jaw.
“And you’re Alex, the hot tempered, some-what cocky, lead singer.” I replied. “Doesn’t mean that I’m going anywhere because you told me about your brother,”
“It’s not just about my brother, Butterfly. It’s everything in general. You’ve really surprised me over the past few months. You didn’t run when I told you that I wanted you and only you. You were the first to admit that you loved me, which I never saw coming. You didn’t run away when I went off for tour and couldn’t call you back. You’re...not what I expected. I can’t express how glad I am that you proved me wrong.”
I snuggled in tighter to his side until I heard breaking come from downstairs. Alex and I both bolted straight up. I looked at him concerned for a minute before we were scurrying off of the bed, and out of his room. I followed Alex closely down the stairs until we reached the living room just in time to see my mom fuming and Peter looking almost as mad. Then there was the broken picture frame from their wedding.
“What the hell?” I nearly yelled. “Mom, why are you throwing things?!”
“Because Peter pissed me off.” She spat.
Alex shook his head.
“Why are you two still fighting?” He asked them.
“I told her simply that I went to visit your mother this morning...”
“Dad!”
“Peter!”
Alex and I yelled at him at the same time.
“What?! It was just a chat about things,” He shrugged it off.
“Sure! I bet it was,” My mom scoffed.
“Good, Lord. If you two were so un-happy, then why don’t you just get a fucking divorce?” I yelled. “I don’t like you two together anyway. We all knew that this wasn’t going to work from the start anyway...”
“That’s uh...” Alex trailed off. “Probably not the best way to say that,”
“Shut it, Alex,” I snapped. “They clearly aren’t that happy anymore. Maybe they should just call it quits.”
“Days before my birthday?” He asked, looking completely sad. “Come on, Butterfly. In what world is that fair?”
“In what world is it fair that we have to hide?” I questioned right back. Alex shut his mouth and nodded.
“I’ll think about the divorce,” Peter stated.
“I agree with Landon,” My mom replied.
“Okay. I’ll get the papers and we’ll wait until after Alexander’s birthday.”
“Okay,” My mom nodded before stepping over the broken glass and walking toward the door. She didn’t say anything else after she slammed and I could hear her car backing up and taking off down the street.
“Well...that was odd.” Peter stated. “Alexander, clean up the vase,” He said before walking off.
I turned to Alex and took a deep breath.
“Come here,” He opened his arms, which I easily stepped into. “It’s okay, Landon.”
“You better be right,” I huffed.

♥

“How are you holding together?” Kara asked sweetly at Alex and Rian’s joint birthday party. Both of them had just turned nineteen.
I smiled sadly at the girl with the classic red cup in her hand.
“I could be better. It’s weird without having Carson around,”
“This is your first time without your twin, isn’t it?”
I nodded.
“How could you tell?”
“Well, you two were always together, if not you weren’t that far apart.” The girl reasoned.
“I suppose you’re right,” I replied. “Now if you will excuse me, I have to find one of the birthday boy’s.”
“Okay,” She giggled.
I rounded a corner and easily found Alex chatting among some of his high school friends before I slipped my arms around his waist.
“Happy birthday,” I chirped.
He looked down at me a smile. He kissed the top of my head and wrapped an arm loosely around my shoulders. We’ve been pretty inseparable this entire night. We needed someone to cling to, and since our parents got divorced a little over a week ago, we’re no longer related. It was nice to hold his hand and kiss him in public. Some people still looked at us weirdly, but that’s okay. At least now we don’t have to feel guilty about every time we sneak around. It was good to be out in the open.
“Thank you,” He smirked. “Alex Grieco, Matt Colussy, you already know Flyzik, and Evan Kirkendall. They’re all a part of the All Time Low crew. Guys, this is my girlfriend, Landon,”
I smiled at them.
“Nice to meet you guys.” I stated. They all replied with hello’s and nice greetings. “I’m sorry, but I’m going to have to steal the birthday boy away for a few minutes.”
“Take him!” Even pleaded.
Alex shook his head and flipped him off before he followed me into a quiet hall.
“What did you need me for?” He asked. I didn’t answer, but I pressed my lips to his quickly before pulling away.
“I wanted to give you your present before it gets too much more crowded and I can’t find you...so...happy birthday,” I stated, handing over a small, wrapped, package. Alex beamed at me before he started to open it slowly. Finally, he pulled out the small chain with the guitar pick connected to it. “I-it’s a L...for Landon. I have one with an A on it...” I trailed off, ringing my hands together.
His smiled got even wider before he hugged me tightly to his chest.
“This is the best birthday present ever, Butterfly. Thank you,”
“You’re welcome,” I mumbled into his chest. Alex pulled away and kissed my lips one more time before putting the necklace I gave him on.
The next morning, Alex and I drove around down-town Baltimore. We went into every vintage little shop that we could find, and the cutest diner possible. It was nice to actually walk around the town, with our hands linked tightly together. Just four months ago, I couldn’t see this happening, but here it was. We were acting like a couple, which we really are, and people didn’t care. In fact, no one even noticed when we gave little pecks on the lips. I was nearly one hundred percent worry-free for the first time in a while. Sure, Carson leaving still hurt, but knowing her, she will be back. Carson can’t stay away from my side for long and vice-versa.
“What are you thinking about, Missy?” Alex asked, poking my forehead.
I wrinkled up my nose.
“How much I miss Carson. I was thinking about going to visit her and my dad when you go off on tour,” I said truthfully.
“Didn’t he kick you out?” He chuckled.
I nodded sadly.
“Yeah, and I have a lot of apologizing to do,”
Alex nearly dropped his fork.
“You...apologizing?” He asked, and I nodded my head again. “Since when?”
“Since now....it’s time to turn over a new leaf. He deserves respect, not what I gave him. He’s my dad, and we might not get along all of the time, but I do love and miss him. It’s time I grew up and gotten over myself.”
Alex hummed and leaned over the table to kiss my lips.
“I really love this new attitude.”
“Thanks, I try,” I laughed.
“You will be alright while I’m gone right?”
“Of course I will be,” I agreed. “I just...I’ll miss you,”
“I’ll miss you too. I promise that I’ll call you every day,” He said sadly.
I shook my head, and felt sadness get even stronger.
“Don’t promise me things that you can’t keep, Alex.”
“Okay...how about this...I promise that I will call you whenever possible. We’ll skype whenever I can, and I’ll always text you to remind you how much I love you. How does that promise sound,”
“That sounds amazing,” I smiled.
Somehow, I knew that we were going to be alright.