Gerard Way Is My Dad?

"Let's be realistic, Helena. You don't hate her." Gerard said, touching my arm a little.

Stop! I thought.

"Yeah, I do, dad. She tried to block me from knowing who you are. Shouldn't I have a right to know who my father is? That's all I wanted for the last 15 years. Then, I had to find out for myself or...actually have my father walk up to me. It isn't fair. You aren't a bad person or anything. So, I don't see why she didn't want me to know you." I bit my lip, hoping he wasn't going to confess some huge secret about his past life or whatever. Well, I knew that Gerard Way didn't have a perfectly clean record or anything but, still, he isn't bad.

"Look, I see why she wanted to protect you from...me, I guess. Don't hate her for that."

"What did you do to her that's so bad, then? What made her hate you so much?" I said, and Mikey wrapped his arm around me. Right now, Mikey was my best friend.My only friend, too.

“I don’t want to tell you right now, Helena. You are too young to know.” Now that was shit. Real shit.

“Too young? What the fuck do you mean, too young?” I rolled my eyes and Mikey held me tighter. I laid my head on his chest, gently.

“I just wasn’t a good person, then. Okay? You don’t need to know.”

“Gerard, if I’m 15 and your 30 then you were my age when you got my mom pregnant. So, I am not too young to know if you did it when you were my age!” He had this clueless look on his face for a second and then nodded.

“Don’t call me Gerard. I’m your dad. And, you still have no business knowing. Helena, I will tell you when you are older. You will just have to wait.”

“Tell me!” I shouted a little. Gerard shook his head, no. Mikey sighed.

“No, Helena!”

“Look, don’t you want me to learn from your mistakes? Instead of becoming a teenage mother or something.” I rolled my eyes at him a bit.

“Okay, if you want to know that bad then I will freaking tell you. All right, when your mom was pregnant with you I made her do drugs. Okay? I’m a horrible person. I know.”

I didn’t know what to say. I could have been born with a birth defect or not even lived because of this man who calmed to be my ‘father’. It suddenly made me crave to die, if that makes sense.

“W-What?” I said, quietly. Mikey looked over at Gerard. Gerard got up and left, sniffing. I heard his door close and Frank walked out.

“What’s going on, now?” He asked, sitting next to me.

I was still in shock. Wouldn’t you be? Has your dad ever almost killed you before you were even alive?

“Helena, don’t cry. He loves you now. He didn’t know back then. It’s okay.” Mikey whispered in my ear. I didn’t even know I was crying.

“What’s going on?” Frank asked again, looking at Mikey.

“Nothing.” Mikey said.

“Something is or Helena wouldn’t be crying.” Frank began to look at me, concerned.

“Frank, just don’t ask, please.” Mikey said.

“Well…okay. Do you need a hug, Helena?” He asked. Before I could nod, he hugged me anyway. I couldn’t help but hug back and cry on him a little.

“Mikey, Frank, can you go away for a minute? I need to talk to my…daughter.” Gerard said, walking out. I bit my lip and continued to cry a bit. They started to walk away and Gerard sat back down next to me. I realized that without Mikey, I was scared to death. I was cold, shaking, and crying harder.

“Helena, I’m sorry. I was totally irresponsible. Honestly, I still am. Your mother has a right to hate me…and…well, you do too. I’m sorry. I was just so addicted. I couldn’t stop. Then, your mom asked me to stop so I forced them upon her to make her shut up.” I noticed that he had been crying too. I really had no idea what to say.

“If I knew you were going to be as beautiful and amazing as you are now, then I would have never done it. When you are a 15 year old, male, drug addict then your kids don’t really matter. It’s just the drugs. They take over your mind. You really don’t need to ever try them.”

But, I already have, dad. I can’t take it back now.

“I a-already have” I whispered and Gerard looked at me, funny.

“D-Drugs? You?” He said in a hushed tone. I nodded.

“Why?”

“The p-pain. I w-wanted my life o-over.” I whispered. I had never shared this with anyone but Brik, who took me to the hospital that one-day. But, my dad seemed like he would understand.

“S-Suicide?” Gerard muttered and I nodded again.

“H-Helena…no...That’s horrible. Does your mom know?”

“No.”

“Suicide is serious, Helena.”

“I k-know.” I said, quietly. I started to cry more, remembering the past. He held onto me, tight.

“When?”

“L-Last year.”

“Well, never again. Don’t do it ever again. Let’s talk about this a different time though. I have a concert in an hour and I have to get ready. Okay, baby?” I nodded and he kissed the top of my head before leaving the room.

Frank walked out and he looked at me. He was obviously ready for the show already.

“What’s going on?” He whispered.

“Frank, I don’t know if I should tell you or whatever. It’s really serious.” I said, very quietly. Frank slipped his body, close to mine, on the couch.

“It’s okay, Helena. I’ll probably understand.” I had to tell someone else. I just needed to spill my feelings to someone else, so I nodded and started to tell.

“Gerard, my dad, see, when my mom was pregnant with me…he forced to her use to drug, Frank. It could of killed me. And…he just told me…and then I spilled about my attempted suicide. Brik broke up with me and…everything isn’t really turning out well. I need a friend.” Frank’s small smile turned into a huge frown, quick.

“R-Really? Helena, I’m sorry. Gerard loves you now, though. He would never hurt you on purpose. About the whole suicide thing…I don’t know what to say. That’s…deep. We can chat about it, if you like. I’ll be your friend. Brik was your boyfriend, right?” I nodded.

“Well, you don’t need to worry about him. Everything will work out, once and for all. We all love you here. Don’t worry. Let your dad’s mistakes teach you, okay? Just tell me everything. I’m here for you. I don’t even care if I miss the show tonight. We are going to talk and end up having a good time.” He smiled again. I hugged him again. Frank was really sweet. I didn’t really think he would be like this when I first saw him in real life. Ya know? Now, he was going to be my friend.

“My whole life, I always wanted to know who my dad was. It was my dream, well other than being in a famous band. Everyone always thought I was weird because on parent’s day, my mom would only come. They would ask me where my dad was and I would just shrug, because I didn’t know. My mother wouldn’t let me ask questions about him or anything. A few years ago I started to listen to My Chem and stuff. My mom was always a little iffy whenever I talked about y’all, especially Gerard. I’ve heard her talk to her friends about my dad. She would be constantly putting him down and talking about how horrible he is. I told my mom that if she didn’t give me any information about my dad then I would kill myself. So, that’s exactly what I did. She wouldn’t. So, I attempted suicide. But, Brik found me unconscious on the floor. He took me to the hospital, saved my life, and then paid all the bills and everything. He understood that I didn’t want my mom to know and why, so he didn’t tell her. I try not to talk about it or anything.” I continued on with my story until, Bob walked out.

“Frank we have to go!”

“I’m not going.”

“Why? We need you.”

I don’t know how, but I ended up on the stage that night. I’m serious. I knew all the songs and everything and Frank just was like, “Helena, you do it.” So, I did.

The only thing was, Gerard didn’t know until he saw me on stage, playing for Frank.

“The next song is…” Gerard said, in between songs, then saw me, “HELENA!” he shouted and the crowd grew wild. Actually, the next song was going to be I Never Told You What I do For A Living. But, thank God my name is Helena. If my name was Lauren or something he would of yelled “LAUREN!” and of course, there was no MCR song called Lauren.

I smiled at my dad a little and he mouthed, “Where’s Frank?” I nodded my head towards behind the stage. He was standing there, watching me the whole time.

We had to play Helena and I sang along to it as I played. When it was over, Gerard looked over at me and then back at the crowd.

“Okay, some of you may be wondering where Frank is, right?” We heard various answers, very loud, yelled at us.

“Well, in his place tonight, is someone very special to me. Very very special really. Her name is Helena and…” He paused because everyone started to scream “HELENA!??!” and other varieties of my name.

“She’s my daughter.”

That caused an even bigger stir. People began to boo. Some didn’t believe him and I bit my lip.

“Helena, come here.” So, I walked over next to him and he kissed my cheek.

“Wedding Helena Cash everyone!” Gerard wrapped his arms around me and I smiled.

Well, this is going to go down in history.

I heard someone scream, “WHY ISN’T HER LAST NAME WAY THEN?”

How are you gonna explain that nicely, dad? There’s no possible way. Haha. Way. Wow.

“Introducing Wedding Helena Cash – Way, then!” Gerard said smiling at me.

“Oh fuck that whole Cash shit. I’m just Helena Way now!” I said into the mic. I was feeling awkwardly hyper and outgoing that moment. He looked at me, accusingly

“Helena Way, it is. Now, let’s get on with some music.”

And I finished the concert. Did I mention it was [I televised? No? Well, that was because I didn’t know until my mom called after.