Gerard Way Is My Dad?

"C'mon Mikey, you have to have a secret of some kind!" I told Mikey who was standing motionless. His face was blotchy and damp, like he was sweating. I raised my eyebrows. He shook his head. "Yeah huh."

"I'll...tell you...later." Mikey muttered, raspy.

"So, you do have a secret!" I exclaimed, jumping up and down. "Tell us now!" Mikey shook his head.

"I..I wanna talk to Gerard first." Mikey squeaked and Gerard nodded. I watched them leave and shut the door. I rushed to the door on my tiptoes, leaving everyone behind. I only heard one word before freaking out 'pregnant'.

Who did Mikey get pregnant?

Then, I heard them fiddle with the doorknob so I had to run back to the living room. Helena looked at me as if I was crazy. I was only being nosy. I leaned up against the counter, waiting for them to come back. Gerard came out first, his face red like he was holding in laughter but was also concerned. Mikey looked like he was going to cry.

"Um...Mikey has some news." Gerard introduced. "Um...Mikey is..gonna..be a...dad..but..there's a catch."

"Oh..Congratulations, Mikey." We all said, exchanging glances.

"See the thing is...Mikey..isn't gonna really be the dad."

What the fuck?

"He's gonna be the..uh..mom...kinda." I almost dropped to the floor.

MIKEY'S GONNA BE A MOM!?!?! what the hell?

"See, Mikey has a...womb." I heard people trying to hold in laughter behind me. "And..when we were all drunk..he got fucked by some guy..so..he's..pregnant."

"...Whoa." Ray said, from the back. Mikey was a deep, deep red and I saw hot tears forming in his eyes. Gerard loose ones from his cheeks.

"Don't cry, Mikey." Gerard whispered to him.

"It's not fair. I don't want to be a mom!" Mikey cried out, letting the tears fall. I heard unidentifiable sounds of laughter from Ray, Bob, and Helena. "It's not funny!!!"

"Sorry," Helena said, sheepishly.

"I'm getting an abortion!"