Just Come Running

A week passed. A whole week. I only know the number of days that have passed because I counted the amount of different outfits Beth wore. I haven’t left the apartment. I haven’t gone to classes. I haven’t called or texted anyone but Clark. I’ve only eaten when Beth forces me to eat. I’ve…I’ve only been surviving. I took off my ring right after Tyler left me, and put it on a chain around my neck along with his. Even if we’re not together, at least our rings can be.

Even now I’m clutching them in my hand, holding onto the last thing I have to remind me of Tyler.

I just…I feel so empty. Like everything worth anything has been sucked out of my body, leaving behind an empty shell of what I used to be. I know this sounds overdramatic, but I gave everything to Tyler. I truly could see us together forever, and now we’re not, I don’t really know what to do with myself. I really don’t.

“Alright! You’ve had a week to mope, and now we’re taking you out,” Beth announced loudly, bounding into my room.

I looked up from where I was staring out my window, and just stared at her. Uh, what?

“Come again?” I sighed.

“Johnny and I are taking you shopping! We know you loved…um, love Tyler, but the break-up is definite and you need to accept that. So we gave you a week to brood, and now we’re going to cheer you up!” Beth said firmly.

“Johnny hates shopping,” I said monotonally.

“Yeah, I do. But I know it cheers you up,” Johnny shrugged, appearing in my doorway.

I wanted to smile, knowing it meant a lot for him to do something he hated just to make me feel better, but I couldn’t. I’m not at that stage yet.

“I really don’t want to go shopping,” I mumbled, running my hand through my greasy hair.

Wow, this is disgusting. Fuck, I definitely need a shower.

“We’ll give you an hour!” Beth grinned.

*

Here I am, two hours later, with Beth next to me and Johnny on her other side, trailing around the local mall. I’m still not particularly cheerful about being out the apartment, but Beth is and Johnny seems to be too, so I might as well put on an act for them. And at least I’ve showered now. I really was disgusting.

“Can we get something to eat soon? Please?” Johnny whined, tugging at Beth’s arm.

“Yes, child, we can,” Beth snickered, rolling her eyes.

She’s such a mother sometimes. Bless.

“How are you feeling, Drew?” Beth asked, smiling up at me.

I just shrugged. Does she really need to ask that?

“Are we really not making you feel any better?” she pouted.

I don’t want to be rude, but I’ve got to be honest.

“I really don’t think anything could make me feel even a little better right now,” I sighed.

“Oh I think I could,” Beth said enthusiastically.

“Be my guest,” I shrugged.

Beth looked around quickly before smirking. The next thing I knew, Beth had stuck her foot out in front of Johnny, making the short boy trip over and fall straight into the lap of an elderly lady. I froze in shock and Beth burst into laughter as the old woman started squawking and hitting Johnny with her handbag, Johnny stammering and flapping as he tried to get off her. It was only when Johnny managed to stand up and rejoin us that I couldn’t help but let the corner of my mouth curl up into a small smile.

“That’s the Drew we know and love,” Beth giggled, nudging me with her hip.

“You are evil, woman! Pure evil!” Johny cried out, shuddering as he glanced back over his shoulder at the glaring lady.

“No, I’m smart – I’m teaching you a lesson while cheering Drew up. If you looked where you were going, you would’ve seen my foot. But you didn’t, and therefore provided us with entertainment. Suck on that,” Beth retorted, sticking her tongue out.

“I’ve got something better you can suck on,” Johnny said innocently.

Beth rolled her eyes and slapped Johnny around the back of the head, only making me chuckle. Nice, Johnny. Nice.

“Come on, let’s get some food,” I mused.

“Aye aye, skipper,” Johnny saluted, before grabbing Beth’s hand and dragging us towards the food court.

We eventually decided on a good old fashioned diner on the far end of the food court which wasn’t too busy, and sat down in a booth by the window. 10 minutes later, a busty blonde waitress came over.

“What would y’all like to order?” she asked with a toothy smile.

“The deluxe cheeseburger and a diet lemonade,” Beth smiled.

“I’ll have the deluxe cheeseburger too and a mountain dew,” Johnny said.

“Uh, the regular cheeseburger and a water, please,” I said quietly.

“Only a water?” the waitress said, cocking her head to the side.

“Yeah, just a water,” I nodded.

“Alrighty, well, my name’s Bailey-Anne, so call me over if you need anything else. Anything else,” she smiled, winking at me.

Really? Did she really just do that? Beth and Johnny snickered as the girl sauntered away, before bursting into laughter.

“I can’t believe you’re getting hit on even when you look like shit,” Johnny cackled.

“Johnny!” Beth hissed, hitting him in the arm.

“It’s okay, I know I look like shit. Apparently it’s just a natural charm,” I smiled, shrugging.

“Fuck, I have a natural charm, why don’t I get hit on?”

“Because you’re a midget whose natural charm is winking sleazily and not-subtly looking women up and down?” Beth offered.

“Ah fuck off gargantua,” Johnny retorted, sticking his tongue out.

I shook my head in amusement as they bickered back and forth like siblings, gazing out the window at all the people walking by. I wonder what problems they’re going through. Do they have the same troubles as me? Or are their lives perfectly wonderful?

“Shit,” Beth cursed, breaking me out of my thoughts.

“What?” I frowned.

Beth smiled weakly and nodded out the window. I turned to look, only to wish I hadn’t. Why is he here?! Can’t I escape him, just for one day?

“Fuck, Tyler looks worse than you,” Johnny said softly.

For once, Johnny’s being serious. Tyler’s pale skin was almost translucent, the dark purple bags under his eyes only making it worse. The hair that was poking out of his grey beanie looked ragged and unwashed, and there was an agony in his eyes that sent a pain through my chest. He’s suffering just as bad I am, if not worse, he really is. Then Haley and Lee appeared next to him, Haley with a bandage around her neck. Oh, they’re outside a tattoo shop. That doesn’t surprise me. I guess they’re trying to cheer him up too.

“I-I want to talk to him,” I choked, my eyes filling up with tears.

“Drew, you and I both know that’s not a good idea,” Beth said.

“But…”

“Drew, I was there when he came over, I know how he said goodbye, but talking to him while you’re healing is not going to help either of you. Just leave him be,” Beth interrupted, shaking her head.

I didn’t want to admit it, but fuck, she’s right. I-I shouldn’t go and talk to him, despite the voices screaming in my head to do just that. It would hurt too much. And as if he felt that hurt, Tyler snapped his head in my direction, his eyes catching with mine. They look so dark, so bleak, so empty, just like I am. I felt a tear trailing down my cheek, and Tyler’s face contorted at the sight of it, before he looked away and disappeared from my line of sight. I quickly wiped the tear away and turned back to face my friends, both of whom were staring at me sadly.

“I don’t want or need your pity,” I said through gritted teeth.

“We know, Drew. We just want to help,” Johnny said.

I just nodded, plastering a fake smile on my lips as ‘Bailey-Ann the waitress’ came back over with our drinks. I can get through this. I’m strong enough now. But is Tyler?