Don't Fall Apart On Me Tonight

Dear Cresh,

So, how are the withdrawals? I wish I could be there to help you through them. Know ing that you're in pain- not only emotional, but physical, too- and I can't be there to help you stresses me out like you don't even know.

Well, I guess you do know. You know exactly how much I worry, even if they drugs and alcohol sometimes make you forget. You know that calling me to come and get you is as much for my sake as it is yours. If you didn't call, I'd be even more worried.

You know all this already though.

That's what makes you amazing #3: you know me better than I know myself.

I seriously can't remember a time when you weren't my best friend. You've always been there for me and I can't thank you enough. And after all that time, you've come to know me so well. You can walk into a room, take one look at me and know that I'm upset. And most of the time, you know why I'm upset, too.

I don't know if it's because we've spent so much time together or if it's because you're the only person who really gets me, because you are, but you are literally the only person who can read me like a book like you do. To everyone else, I'm hard to read, and I hid me emotions well. But yo you, I"m an open book. You know what's bothering me even when I don't. When something's wrong and I'm being all angsty and I don't' know why I'm being so emotional (it's not PMS, even if you say it is), you can tell what's bothering me and make it better.

Remember when we were 10 and we were both learning to ride a bike? You've always been more athletic than I was, so it wasn't a huge surprise when you got to take the training wheels off before me. But for some reason, it really bothered me. It was like you were leaving me behind, growing up without me. And it turned me into a little moody bitch.

Yeah, I'll admit it now. I was being moody and annoying and I'm sorry.

Back then, though, I wouldn't admit it. I wouldn't even tell you why I was so upset. But I didn't need to.

Somehow, you just knew.

It's like you've got this one-way best friend telepathy.

You spent all day, every day, that whole summer helping me get good enough at biking that I could take of the training wheels, too.

When I fell, I remember you wouldn't let anyone help, not even our moms. You'd be the one to get out the Transformers bandaids and spray my cut with antiseptic, hugging me when I teared up from the singing got something in my eye.

I loved everything about that summer. Except the fact that it ended.

You taking care of me and making sure I was happy like you did just showed me, once again, that you are an amazing, sweet, caring person who is the best best friend I could ever ask for.

I'll see you in 4 days.

Il be here waiting to see you.

-Killian