Sweet Illusions

A few days later, she finally escaped the overbearing clutches of her mother and returned to the hospital and limped up the hallway seeing another medical resident who was cute in a Seth Rogan kind of way and she overheard him speaking, “She has a fever, so we’re going to watch that overnight. Also, we’re treating her with a course of antibiotics and steroids, just to be safe. Hey Elliot! You just got discharged and now you’re back? Most people try to steer-clear of hospitals,” He joked as other doctors walked away.

“Gotta be there for the bestie! I brought her a hot chocolate with extra marshmallows, is that okay?” Elliot asked holding up the travel mug in her right hand.

“Yeah, as long as it’s not a virus cocktail, she’ll be fine. Excuse me,” He smiled as his pager went off and he continued down the hall. Elliot smiled and made her way to Madison’s room and knocked on the door, but didn’t wait long enough for anyone to respond she just entered the room.

“Hey there stranger!” Madison smiled, “Would that happen to be a double chocolate-y hot chocolate with marshmallows? Oh my God, that is why you are my best friend!” She smiled as she did a small dance within the confines of her hospital bed. Her hands extending for the hot pink travel mug.

“Meh, that makes sense,” Elliot shrugged handing her the mug with the coveted liquid. “Screw all these years of friendship, next time I’ll just buy a hot chocolate and save myself some time.”

“Yeah, yeah, well come take a nap with me, which is all I fucking do by the way! Nap and hang out with the nurses. Right Rose?” Madison smiled looking at the twenty-something nurse with a shy smile checking Madison’s vitals. “Hollah!” She waved her hands as Rose did the same.

“So how’s being engaged? Still gooey and romantic? Probs better than my shit storm of a love life,” Elliot sighed, placing her hand on her cheek and resting it on the chair.

“It’s good! I love this ring! It’s like he knew I’d love it and he knows me so well and I love him-” Madison started to rant with a haze of love taking over her.

“Can you hold on for a second?” Elliot smiled and after Madison nodded curiously, Elliot pretended to pass out with obnoxious snoring. All Madison could do was let out a giant laugh and smack Elliot.

“God, I forgot what a giant bitch you are! Did you call him?” Madison changed her tone from joking to a stern and maternal tone. She sipped cooly from the mug and gave Elliot an expecting look. For some reason, Elliot checked insecurely if they were alone before resting her head on the side of the bed, pouting her lips.

“No,” she stated gruffly, “and fuck it all because he hasn’t called me either. I just need a nap thinking about it. I mean I don’t even know what I would say if he did call, you know? It’s so fucking complicated and wah, wah, wah my life. How are you feeling?” Elliot rushed through and changed the subject as quickly as possible.

“Hmm, well I feel fine. Tired. Hey, you know I love you right?” Madison smiled sleepily as her eyes started to flutter. Elliot began to yawn as well as the afternoon sun came through the windows in a yellowish-orange hue that seemed to make the whole world seem sleepy.

“Mhmm, I love you too,” Elliot smiled, finally succumbing to the lazy afternoon atmosphere and letting her brain finally stop. A couple hours later she awoke to the sound of two boys conversing. She could barely make out what they were saying until she finally recognized the voices as Kennedy and John. Her heart began to speed up and now she was in the awkward position of if she should make it know she’s awake or not.

“I don’t know if I should even both with her anymore. I mean there’s plenty of other fish in the sea who don’t lie or manipulate people,” John sighed, Elliot felt a flash of anger in his hypocrisy. She had to shut her eyes harder to keep herself from jumping to her own defense. Plus, spying was so much more informative.

“Yes, there are. But all those other fish, aren’t her,” Kennedy explained. “If you don’t love her, the by all means you don’t need this stress! But, if you do, then you cannot let this take you down. This started out as something bad, but look what it turned into. I know for a fact, there wasn’t a second you weren’t at least subconsciously happy when she was around. Shit happens, you know?”

“Oh my God, there’s sick people sleeping here! Shut your goddamn mouths!” Madison scolded with her eyes still closed, but loudly. Elliot sighed loudly and picked up her head to give her a ‘what the hell are you doing?!’ look. Madison’s eyes shifted with a juvenile smile on her lips and she stretched. “Let’s face it, you two love each other, you’re both terrible people and you deserve each other,” Madison snapped, grabbing her soothing eye mask and slipping it over her eyes.

“Wow, okay. That’s why you should never wake up Madison before she gets all her beauty sleep,” Elliot spoke with her eyebrows furrowed and staring at the petite blonde girl who looked so peaceful now that she was out. Kennedy ushered everyone to the cafeteria, but as soon as the three were out of her room they began to crack up.

“Good luck dealing with that for the rest of your life,” John smirked with his hands deep inside his pockets. Elliot was laughing so hard she could agree verbally, but nodded her head dramatically. Kennedy chuckled, before his eyes grew wide with that possibility.

“John, I’m sorry… for everything. You didn’t deserve what I did to you and I do love you, which is probably why I feel so terrible,” Elliot stopped in the middle of the hallway and blurted out, not looking John in the eye till the end of her confession. She stared awkwardly at him, biting her lip hoping he wasn’t going to make her look like a total idiot in front of Kennedy. She was even swaying from nervousness, her pale peach dress mirroring her movements.

“I, uh, I’m sorry too. I was acting like a total ass when you first met me and I pretty much didn’t deserve a legitimate chance. I guess I hoped that you had seen through that asshole exterior and that’s why you liked me, but I don’t know. I thought I guess it was just that you didn’t even like me at all…” John explained, seeming just as awkward as Elliot had been.

“Well, when I started the whole thing I didn’t, I wanted to teach you a lesson, but I mean. Now… I love you and everything you are. God, this is so fucking stupid. I feel like a douche saying all this- talking about feelings,” Elliot exhaled before she even realized what she was saying.

“Oh, thank goodness,” John sighed with relief, with a smile crawling on his face. He wrapped his arms around her tightly and leaned down to whisper in her ear, “me too.” Somehow, that seemed to be the most romantic thing he had said to her. Two words: me too.

Elliot wasn’t sure how long they stood there in each others’ arms, but soon she felt the stares of onlookers burning into her back and she cleared her throat and both John and her let go of each other and stood up straight. She looked John in the eyes and hope swelling within her, “Do you maybe want to get back together…?” Elliot asked shyly.

“Uh, well I just think that… maybe we should just wait for a while. Just start over… I don’t think I can just pick up everything, where we left it off…” John muttered, avoiding eye contact. Elliot felt a great disappointment wash over her, but instead she faked a smile and nodded in agreement. Kennedy came over and Elliot was grateful she wouldn’t have to think about how to respond.

“So I talked to Dr. Davis and apparently so far so good, Maddie isn’t rejecting Elle’s marrow and her white blood cells are up, too. Still a long way to go, but I’ll take good news over the bad,” Kennedy explained trying to balance three cups of coffee in his hands making a triangle with them.

He passed out the coffees amongst them and Elliot smiled, hoping Madison was going to be okay again. That at least everything could go back the same way they were with her best friend. She scratched the styrofoam cup nervously and looked down.

“Have you ever had a feeling in your gut that was stronger than any information anyone could ever tell you? I have one of those feelings about Madison beating this thing,” Elliot told both boys with a shy smile on her face. Maybe because it was both a hope and a deep feeling that she believed more than anything. And no one wants those feelings to be mocked. Elliot finally looked up and saw the two boys standing next to her with hopeful smiles on her face, but Elliot still stared up, hoping she was right. More than she had wished for anything in her life.

The three grew quiet. With the final realization of how much was on the line. Madison Harlow was so deeply embedded into their lives that life without her seemed unfathomable. Elliot bit her lip as the boys began talking, that was the same way she felt about John. She blushed to herself at the realization, but that she knew it.