The Only Hope for Me Is You

Frank was going down on my pretty hard but we were still fully clothed; I promised myself not to go too fast like before. Just then, we heard two knocks on the door, and Frank thrusted one more time, then groaned.

"Again?"

"Frank, babe, it's okay.

"But--"

"COME IN!" I yelled, and Frank rolled off of me, and picked up the guitar really fast and sitting down like he hadn't just been all over me, and starting playing a few chords. The door opened, and Gerard walked in, and saw that Frank was playing Pansy.

"Aw, dude! I haven't seen her in a really long time!" he said, and Frank looked up, picked up Pansy and turned her sideways, then back down.

"I was bored, so I thought I'd bring her out again," he said.

"He played me a song!" I added, and Frank nodded.

"Ha...awesome..." Gerard said, his smile fading. "Anyways, I just made dinner. Come join us." He faked a smile, then left the door open, and walked down the hall to knock on his brother's door.

"Whew," I said, holding his hand. "That was close..." he laughed.

"Let's go get food. I'm starving!" he said, and he picked me up off the bed and set me on my feet, and we walked into the living room and sat at the kitchen table.

"So what's for dinner?" I asked Ray, who was reading a newspaper. I looked at the headline, which read:

"FABULOUS KILLJOYS INFILTRATE BL/IND ONCE AGAIN"

I smirked, reading that, thinking that they're never going to catch us. Ray put the paper down, and shook his head.

"Gerard said it was a surprise." I narrowed my eyes, trying to think of what it was. Then it hit me.

"No, he should't have..." I said, smiling. He remembered what I had told him what my favorite food was, and I realized he was trying to win me over again.

"He really is sweet..." I said to myself, and saw that Lauren and Mikey had entered the room. She waved at us.

“Hey guys…” she said quietly. I smiled at her, and got up and gave her a bear hug.

“So glad you’re better now.” I said, smiling, and she nodded.

“Me too.” she said. "Me too..." I smiled again, and patted her on the back before sitting down and snuggling into Frank's arms, resting my head on his shoulder. Ray scooted over for Mikey and Lauren to sit down, and they sat in the same exact position that me and Frank were in. Gerard came walking into the room, having taken his jacket off, and walked over to the stove.

"You guys ready for this shit?" He asked, eyes wide with excitement. I already knew what he was going to produce from the oven, but I didn't want to spoil it for the others.

"Do it!" I yelled, and he nodded, bent down, and took out a tray from the oven, and I saw that I was right.

"HOLY SHIT!?" Frank yelled, grinning. "Tell me that is NOT a triple cheese pizza." Gerard laughed.

"Oh, it is buddy," He said, putting the dish in front of us. I could immediately smell the cheesy goodness resonating from the pizza, and I looked around the table. Lauren and Mikey had huge grins on their face, and Ray was smiling as well. Frank looked like a fucking six year old, his mouth open in surprise, his eyebrows raised in happiness.

"OH MY GOD!" he cried.

"Frank, you are a child!" I said, squeezing his hand.

"It's fucking pizza!" he said, reaching over and grabbing a slice.

"Really, bro, where the hell did you find this?" Mikey asked, grabbing a slice for Lauren and handing it to her before grabbing his own. "This is insane!"

"When I was refueling the car earlier, I saw it in the gas station and HAD to get it," he said, winking at me. Shit. I was confused all over again. Damn it, Gerard, why did you have to be so fucking sweet? I grabbed a slice and stuffed my face with it, savoring the cheesy taste in my mouth, not remembering in the slightest the last time I had a fucking slice of pizza.

"Oh my god," Frank said, moaning. "This is a fucking orgasm in my mouth, I swear..." I choked on the pizza in my mouth after he said this, and started coughing. Frank was just about to slap my back, but Gerard got to me first, and I coughed up a huge ball of cheese, and it flew out of my mouth and bounced onto the floor.

"Aw, grody!" Ray yells, and we all laugh. I keep coughing, and Gerard pats my shoulder.

"You need something to drink?" He asks and I nod, still coughing. Seconds later, he puts a huge glass of water in front of me and I chug it down, trying to get that tickle out of my throat. I drain the glass, and cough one last time.

"Thanks, Gerard, " I said, putting the glass back down and reach for another slice, but it's all gone. I look at Frank, who had pizza falling out of him mouth. He grinned nervously and I shook my head.

"Jesus Frank..." I say. "Did Gerard even get any?" He shrugged.

"Idunt kno" he muffled, pizza still in his mouth. "I jusf lik piftsa..." He swallowed, and grinned at everyone.

"I swear you are like six years old, Frank." I said, shaking my head, and looking across the table at Lauren, who was laughing her ass off. Mikey had a tiny hint of a smile on the corner of his mouth, and Ray was gone, his hand over his mouth, laughing. I look to my right at Gerard, who was still standing next to the table. He was laughing as well, but I could see it in his eyes that he was in pain still. I decided I had to talk to him, right here. I nudged Frank.

"Hmm?"

"I have to, uh, use the bathroom...: I said, and he nodded, letting me up. I motioned with my eyes to Gerard, telling him to follow me outside a few minutes later. He nodded slightly, and I walked into the bathroom for safety measures, waited a minute or two, and flushed the toilet, then climbed out the window to meet with Gerard outside. I heard him say to the others

"I'm gonna go for a smoke," and then I heard the front door open and close, and I saw him walk around the corner, and walked up to me.

"What?" he asked, and I stared at the ground, moving a rock around with my foot.

"You remembered..." I said slowly, looking up and squinting from the sunlight in my eyes. He nodded, smiling slightly.

"I remembered what you said you liked..." He said, licking his lips. "Look, Cy, I know it may have come across like I was trying to win you back..."

"Well, yeah,"

"But I didn't mean it that way. You deserve him. Really, you do. And I want to help to make you as happy as you can."

"Gee..."

"No, Cy, I mean it..." he said, putting his hand on my shoulder. "I know I can't do anything to change your mind, but just know...I still love you, like I did yesterday." he smiled, and I knew what he was referencing right away.

"Gee...that was lame." I said, chucking, and he smiled.

"Naw, I know," he said. "Got you smiling though, didn't I?" I nodded.

"But Gerard...the thing is..." I said, and he leaned forward, hanging onto every word. "I'm not completely over you either." He stood back, looking shocked.

"What, really?" I nodded.

"What you did today made me realize...you are so sweet, and caring, and so just plain awesome, that I don't know..." I looked into his eyes.

"What I did to you was fucking cruel. I was a bitch. I shouldn't have just shrugged you off like that..." He wrapped his arms around me, putting his chin on top of my head.

"Cy, I understand what you mean," he said, and I felt his chin moving as he spoke. "You did beat the shit out of me emotionally, but I understand what you're saying." He pushed me away, and put his hands on my shoulders and looked into my eyes.

"We can fix this." He said, smiling warmly. I looked away.

"But Frank--"

"I'll talk to him, okay?" he said.

"You'd really do that?"

"For you, my dear, of course." Gerard said, and brought me back in for another hug. I hugged back this time, and the fire returned once again.

"I find it hard to stay, with the words you say, Gerard..."

"Baby let me in, PLEASE, Cy." he said, pushing me away again. "You can cry all you want to, I don't care..." He grabbed my hand.

"We WILL make this work." he said. "Promise."