The Only Hope for Me Is You

I was shaken awake by Gerard, and when my eyes snapped open, I let out a cry of surprise, seeing his face inches from mine, full of worry and concern.

“WAH! What, WHAT?!” I cried, waving my arms in front of my face. “I’m up! I’m up!”

“Jesus Christ, Cy!” Gerard cried. “You weren’t breathing!”

“Fuck me…” I said, sitting up and rubbing the back of my head, almost forgetting where I had fallen asleep last night. I was in Gerard’s room, I remembered that. I looked around, seeing his drawings and stack of comic books on his desk, then finally moved my gaze to Gerard. He was on his knees on the bed, hands on his thighs, leaning forward facing me, his hair unkempt and messy. He had taken his jacket off before going to sleep, his arms strained slightly. His hazel eyes were still wide, staring at me, his lips tucked into his mouth and his eyebrows raised. I squeezed my eyes, adjusting to the sunlight shining into the room, and wiped my hands on my face, and kept them there as I spoke.

“Shit, Gerard...I didn’t mean to scare you like that…” I said, slapping my hands onto my thighs and looking at him again. He blinked.

“Why does that happen?” He asked, and I shrugged.

“Because I’m stressed,” I said, scooting over to lie down next to him, head in his lap. I looked up at him as I spoke, and he looked down at me, petting my hair. “When I’m stressed, Gee, I have nightmares, and usually stop breathing for some reason.” He frowned.

“Cy, is this because of Frank?” He asked, and I nodded. “you have to talk to him about this, okay?”

“Gerard, he’s just going to shrug me off—“

“You won’t know until you try,” He said, smiling down at me. I nodded, then sat myself up, and wrapped my arms around him, my chin on his shoulder.

“Gerard, thank you, really,” I said, staring at the door behind him for some reason. “You’re my best friend, you know that?” I felt him nod, and he put his hand on the back of my head and rubbed it through my hair.

“I know,” he said. “And you’re one of mine.” I leaned back, and we smiled at each other, our hands on each other’s shoulder. “All of us…we’re a family. And whatever happens between us, we always have each other’s backs, right?” I nodded.

“Right.”

“Okay, so let’s go talk to Mr. Grumpy.” He let go of my shoulders, and helped me up off the bed, and he grabbed his jacket from the back of his chair and put it on, zipping it up to his chest.

“You okay?” He asked, and I nodded.

“I am now,” I said, smiling, and together we walked out of his room, down the hall and into the living room, to see Ray, Mikey, and Frank on the couch, Frank’s bad leg up on the coffee table. Revenge was probably still sleeping in Ray’s room, since I didn’t see him out here.

“Hey!” Ray said, smiling. “Look who decided to join us!” Mikey waved, and I waved back, and saw that Frank’s face was sour; he kept his eyes focused on the tv, arms crossed on his chest, pouting. Seeing this, I looked to Gerard, who motioned his head to me, telling me to go sit next to him, and I nodded back.

“I’m going to go get some air…” Gerard said, stretching his arms above his head, and walked out of the shack into the sunlight, his hair blowing from the wind. I watched him leave, and sat myself next to Frank.

“Hey,” I said, slightly on edge. “How’s your foot?”

“Fine,” he said curtly, then took his gaze from the tv to look at me. I saw that his eyes were full of remorse and sorrow, mixed with sadness. I could tell he regretted how he acted last night, and realizing this, I smiled warmly at him, and the corners of his mouth lifted slightly.

“Uh, Mikey?” Ray said, and Mikey lifted his head from his Batman comic, and looked at him.

“Hmm?”

“I forgot…we still have to finish our card game from last night…” Ray said, trying to get him away, so me and Ray could talk in private.

“But I thought we did—“

“Mikey, just—come on,” Ray said, and yanked Mikey up by the arm, and dragged him into the kitchen, with much protest from Mikey.

“But my comic! Batman’s getting his ass kicked and I want to see what happens next—“

“MIKEY!” Ray yelled, and shut him up.

“OKAY!” Mikey yelled back, and I laughed at the two of them going back and forth, then became serious again, looking straight into Frank’s eyes.

“Look, about last night—“I said, but he cut me off by waving his hand in front of my face.

“Cy, no, I was out of line,” he said, shaking his head. “I’m so sorry, I—It’s my foot, you know? It hurts like fuck, especially after how it got fucking stuck in the bed, you know?” I nodded.

“I understand,” I said, and he continued, biting his lower lip.

“I keep blaming myself for putting myself into this position…I’m suck a fucking idiot. I hurt myself every day in the fucking stupidest ways possible—“

“You’re not stupid, babe—“

“And I needed to unleash everything I was feeling, somehow, and you just happened to be the victim…” He blinked, his eyes shining with tears. “I understand if you want to hate my guts…I know I would.” He hung his head, and stared at the floor, waiting for me to respond. I adjusted my position on the couch, putting one leg under the other, and put my hand on his chest. He lifted his hand and grabbed it in his, and squeezed.

“Frank, babe, I’m not mad at you…not in the slightest,” I said, and saw a light spark in his eyes as he brought his gaze back up to me. “I understand where you’re coming from, honey.”

“Ha…yeah, you’re almost as accident-prone as I am,” he said, smiling.

“If not, more,” I responded, and rested my head on his shoulder. He let go of my hand and put his hand on the back of my head, running it through my hair.

“Yeah…we’re that one couple that follows Murphey’s Law,” He said, nuzzling his nose against mine. “Whatever bad can happen, WILL happen.” I giggled, and nuzzled his nose back.

“So we’re still a couple, then?” I asked, and he nodded.

“Were we not?” he replied, and lightly pressed his lips to mine, in a tender, loving way. I smiled as our lips collided, and closed my eyes as we kissed. Everything was back to normal. I made a mental note to thank Gerard again later; after all, he was the one that told me to talk to Frank, and it worked out wonderfully.

“Well, it seems everything’s settled, then?” I heard Gerard’s voice from across the room. I parted from Frank, and smiled at him, seeing him grin back.

“Yep, all thanks to you, Gee,” I said, and winked at him. He chuckled lightly, taking off his jacket and placed it on the hook on the beam, and sat himself next to me and Frank with a loud groan. I smelled his odor, and scrunched my face. He really smelled like shit.

“Man, it’s so fucking HOT out there…” he said, wiping sweat from his brow. “I feel sorry for Pony, going back and forth like this…must be hell…where is he, anyways?” I shrugged, my arms still wrapped around Frank’s neck.

“I don’t know,” I said. “But it’s been a while…I hope he’s okay…”

“You miss me?” I heard from the door, and saw none other than Pony roll through the door, a gigantic box rested between his arm and his hip, his helmet in his other hand. I jumped off of Frank’s lap and ran over to him, ignoring Frank’s grunt of pain from me accidentally kicking his broken foot.

“PONY!” I cried. “So glad to see you again!”

“I was only gone for a few hours…” he said, dropping his helmet as I wrapped my arms around him, feeling the sweat all over his body.

“Still!” I said, and let him go, then pointed at the box. “OH! You found another one,” I added. “Who’s is it?” I took it from him, and turned the box around in my hands, trying to find the logo, and saw the blue smiling star on the side of it.

“RAY! Get over here!” I said, and immediately, Mikey and Ray hurried over to me. I handed the box to Ray.

“Is this mine, or…?” Ray asked, and I nodded.

“Yeah…ask Frank what’s in it,” I said. “From what I’ve seen, it’s a bunch of candid photos, personal records, random papers—“

“And one killer item that will make you feel like shit,” Frank finished for me, still lying on the couch.

“Oh, joy…” Ray said, taking the box. “I say we open all of these at the same time,” he added. “Once we have them all, we’ll go through them in depth, just to see what they have on us.”

“Sounds like a plan, Ray,” I said, patting him on the shoulder. He nodded, and walked down the hall to put the box in the storage room, alone with Frank’s box. Pony reached into his pocket, and took out another folded piece of paper Lauren had sent with him, along with a second piece of paper, which he didn't share with us.

“Mikey, she wrote back,” Pony said, and Mikey nodded, taking the note. "And she drew you something, too, but wouldn't tell me what it was." He handed the other piece of paper to Mikey, who nodded, and jammed it into his pocket, realizing it was between the two of them. Luckily, I got a good glance at it before he slid it into his jacket pocket; Lauren drew a picture of the two of them, holding hands in the desert. It was adorable, I couldn't help but smile at it, even though I barely got to see it. Mikey opened the note, and read it out loud.

“First thing first…BRING FOOD. I swear they are drugging my food. I’m putting what they give me in the air vents, making it look like I’m eating, but I’m really not. I’m so fucking hungry...Also, Mikey, I’m looking forward to this surprise you told me about…if it’s what I think it is, I can not wait to get back to you. xo Lauren.”

He looked up from the note, automatically embarrassed. I turned around, hearing Frank wolf-whistle from the couch, and saw Gerard laugh, falling over Frank, his head in his hands, laughing his extremely unique laugh of his, snorting every once in a while.

“Why did I even read this out loud...” Mikey said, shaking his head, and slapping a hand to his face.

“You gotta be fucking kidding me,” I heard Gerard say. “My own kid brother…sex!” Gerard cried. “What has the world even come to? DEAR GOD IN HEAVEN LET ME DIE!” I tried to not laugh after seeing Mikey’s face in response to Gerard’s comment, but I just couldn’t; my body was still shaking from the laugher I was trying to hold in, and I ended up just letting out a guffaw of laugher that sounded like a mixture of a wailing cat and a moose. Even Pony was laughing, but probably from the inhuman noise that had just escaped from my mouth.

“Cyanide, what the fuck was that?” He said as he laughed. I couldn’t respond, I was laughing so hard; I just shrugged, and shook my head, lifting my arms into the air.

“Fuck if I know!” I cried out finally, and wiped a tear from my eye, and saw Pony nod at me, looking slightly concerned for my well being.

“Oooookay, then, since you guys have CLEARLY lost it, I’m gonna go…see what Dr. D’s up to, check on Lauren again, see if she’s found anything else…” Pony said, and picked up his helmet from the floor and put it on. “but mostly to get away from you psychos…this damn heat makes everyone crazy…” I heard him mumble.

"WAIT!" I said, and ran into the kitchen, took random stuff from the food supply, and put it in an empty box, scribbled a note to Lauren.

"ENJOY THE FEAST! Mikey read the note out loud, so we all know what's going to happen now when you get back. I'm so excited for you! XOXO Cy"

I ran back to Pony, gave him the box of food and put the note inside, and he saluted, leaving the shack again, rolling into the desert, shaking his head. Laughing, I patted Mikey on the shoulder.

“Thanks, Cy,” Mikey said flatly. “To all of you, thanks. Fuckers.” He walked around me, gave the middle finger to his brother and Frank, sticking his tongue out at them as he walked by, and went into his room with the note, taking the drawing out of his pocket as he walked, closing the door behind him. Still laughing, I walked over and sat myself between my two favorite people in the world, and sighed.

“Just imagine, though,” I said slowly. “Mikey and Lauren…”

“Oh fuck, now that image won’t even get out of my head…” Gerard said, and slapped my shoulder. “Damn you, Cy! GAH!” He held his head in his hands and shook it violently. “GET OUT! EW!”

“I just don’t see it in him,” Frank said, chuckling. “He’s just so…INNOCENT, you know?” I nodded, lying down, my head on Frank’s lap and my legs on Gerard’s. I had to admit, this was unbelievably comfortable.

“Definitely,” I said, playing with bee on the “Supa Stinga Demo Lition” logo on the left arm of Frank’s shirt. “He’s so sweet…so innocent…I just can’t even picture it,” I said.

“Well, I can,” Gerard said, slamming his hands onto my legs. “And it won’t fucking leave my head now, no thanks to you, Cy.”

“Aw, you’re just jealous because you have no one to fuck!” Frank joked, sticking his tongue out at him. “You gotta get it up somehow!”

“Shut up, man!” He said, throwing a pillow at Frank, which hit him directly in the face, bounced off, and then hit me in the face.

“HEY! I THOUGHT I WAS SWITZERLAND!” I cried, sitting up, pointing at Gerard, who was so far gone, he was laughing maniacally, snorting as he laughed, tears falling from his eyes.

“TWO FOR ONE!” He managed to cry out, and Frank and I just looked at each other, nodded, and tackled him, pinning him to the couch.

“OH NO!” Double teamed!” Gerard cried, still laughing like a mad man. I was sitting on his stomach while Frank was sitting on the couch behind me, and spit on Gerard’s face, and Gerard’s reaction was priceless. His face turned sour, scrunching up as Frank’s spit landed on his face.

“Ewwwwwwwwwwww………fuck!” He cried. “Truce! Truce! UNCLE! UNCLE!” I laughed, standing up off his lap, and he sat up, wiping the spit off his face, still laughing, his small teeth showing. I looked at Frank, who was smirking at Gerard, a look of satisfaction on his face, slightly nodding.

“Always with the spit, Frank,” Gerard said. “Fuck!”

“Got that image out of your head, though, didn’t it?” Frank replied, patting Gerard on the stomach before standing up, clearly forgetting his foot was broken. Not two seconds away, he tried walking on it.

“Hey, I was wondering—GOD DAMN IT!” He screamed as he put his weight on his broken foot, and fell forward, hitting his head on the coffee table and falling onto the ground.

“Oh my god, Frank!” I cried, crouching down, rolling him onto his back.

“Murphy’s Law, I swear…” He groaned, holding the bleeding cut on his forehead.
“Actually, I call THAT Karma,” Gerard said from the couch. I scoffed, and leaned down on top of Frank, moving his hand from the cut.

“Let me see…aw, babe, you really zonked yourself this time…” I said, kissing his wound, ignoring that bland, salty taste of blood. “You better stay off of it for a while, yeah?”

“I guess…” He said, leaning on his elbows.

“This means no missions or anything til you can walk on it again,” I said, putting my hands on my hips.

“But—but—Cy!”

“No buts!” I said, kissing his forehead again. “My word is final!”

“But, babe…come on…” He said as I helped him on his feet, supporting his weight and walking him into his room. I lied him on the bed, and leaned against his desk, arms crossed over my chest. He turned to look at me, smiling.

“Does this mean no more sex either?” He asked, and I scoffed.

“Maaaaaaaaybe…” I winked.

“Aw, I see what you did there,” he said, and held his arms out. “Come here.” I nodded, tucking in my lower lip into my mouth, and crawled into the bed next to him, and wormed my way into his arms.

“You do know that even though you’re out of commission in the battle field, I am allowed to pull myself out of it as well,” I said.

“Sounds good to me,” he said, kissing the top of my forehead. “I’d like that.”

“Me too,” I said, smiling. “Me too…”