Introvert's Mind

Dakotah was a reckless driver. She was going 120 on a small street, the windows were down and the music was turned up high. Thomas suddenly erupted in laughter once more and Dakotah glanced at him with an amused look. This was the best feeling in the world, he felt so free, like there was nothing binding him to his normal, boring life. He was a whole other person at the moment and he absolutely adored it.

“This is way better than the party!” he yelled over the music and the wind and although he couldn't hear it he knew by the way Dakotah’s body shook that she was laughing.

"I got to agree with you on that one, Tommy-boy." she replied, her hair a whirlwind of blonde around her head. Both of them were laughing freely, for absolutely no good reason and it just felt good. It felt good to actually laugh, without faking it and without feeling like he was being judged. Thomas felt free, like he didn't have a care in the world. It was the first time in years that he had felt like this, and it was the most wonderful feeling in the world. The boy wasn't sure if it was because of the drug he had inhaled or if it was because he was taking a drive with Dakotah Samuels, but either way he wanted this moment to last forever. These were the type of stories that he wanted to tell his children later in life.

"Where are we going?" Thomas finally asked, after they had been driving for what felt like hours. To be honest, he was just a bit out of it and he wasn't exactly sure where they were anymore. The names of the streets and the multiple stoplights blurred into a big mess and when he tried to concentrate on either of them it gave him a headache so at the end he just gave up.

"You'll see, we're almost there. I'm sure you'll like it." the young woman replied, a smirk on her red lips before she started singing along to a rock song once more.

It didn't take long after that to reach the place Dakotah was talking about and when she parked Thomas looked out curiously. He was coming down from his high and felt a lot more normal, although there was still a feeling of weightlessness in his mind. When he saw where they were, a small frown crawled upon his face but it was mostly because he didn't quite understand. They were at an abandoned building. It was five floors high and Thomas was almost certain that it used to be some sort of apartment building.

"What are we doing here, Dakotah?" he asked, and he instantly loved the feeling of her name rolling from his tongue. It just came so easily and flowed so well, although he didn't use her name quite that often. It just felt right, and he liked that.

"You'll see. Just trust me, OK?" she replied, suddenly looking at him intently and their eyes met, her warm chocolate brown eyes boring into his, who were only a boring shade of blue. He didn't answer her; he knew he didn't have to. She only gave him a sly grin, breaking the moment before hastily grabbing his hand and pulling him towards the building.

Thomas, unlike every other teenager, hated things that scared him. He didn't enjoy watching horror movies, nor getting scared by little kid who thought it was funny to jump out of bushes for fun. With this in mind, he certainly did not like to go in abandoned buildings at night, even though Dakotah's warm hand in his certainly made it worthwhile. The girl seemed to be at ease though, since she immediately went to the side of the building where they went through a window that was already open. The inside really wasn't any better than the outside, in fact, it was probably worst. The place was dirty, as was expected, and it was just plain creepy. There were still pieces of furniture, like a few paintings on the wall and some small coffee tables. It must have been a sort of lobby, Thomas thought. And of course, at that moment he started thinking about every horror movie he had watched, most of them that Luke had forced him to watch.

Thankfully, though, they didn't stay there for long before Dakotah started leading up flights of stairs. Thomas couldn't help but notice that these didn't look stable, at all, and that they could most likely give away at any moment but he still followed. They didn't talk while they made their way up the flights of stairs that seemed to never end, there didn't seem to have a need for words to be spoken at that moment.

Finally, they arrived at the top floor. Thomas tried not to look around, tried not to think of whatever murder could have occurred in one of these rooms, or the ever so scary image of a little children just peaking around a door. He mentally reminded himself never to watch another horror movie for the rest of his life. Dakotah had removed her hand from his and was jiggling a door at the end of the hallway, muttering under her breath words that he could not catch. He noticed that she was wearing skinny jeans with a pair of army boots and a small t-shirt that went a bit above her stomach. He instantly felt guilty for staring at her when she turned around, a wide grin on her face and the door behind her open.

"Come on, this is what we came here for." she simply said before quickly turning around and climbing the other flight of stairs that was behind the mysterious door. Thomas, his eyebrows creased together slightly, followed her quickly, not at all interested in staying in the hallway alone and quite curious about where these stairs would lead. Once he got to the top, there was another door and when he pushed it open a gush of cool air hit him like a wall.

Outside. It felt like such a relief at that moment. They were on the roof of the building and it was a wonderful view of the city below them. Thomas couldn't see much apart from the lights, the millions of tiny lights that demonstrated that millions of individuals were living there. The teenager had always had a hard time wrapping in mind around this, the fact that so many people all had their own lives, their own problems, their own joys. It was such a big thing to wrap your mind around and Thomas always found himself thinking about this too deeply. His therapist wouldn't like this fact.

Dakotah was sitting at the edge of the roof, her legs hanging off of the building. She looked so peaceful and serene; it was very different from the loud, reckless girl he knew her as. Thomas wondered how many people she had let glimpse this side of her and he instantly felt like he was invading something personal.

"Well, are you going to come and sit?" Dakotah suddenly asked, turning her head so she was looking at him. As if on command, his body moved and sat beside her. He regretted that he hadn't brought a sweater, that t-shirt couldn't be very warm. He knew that if he had more courage, he would've placed his arm around her shoulders, but he did not have those guts. "So, you still haven't answered my question."

It took Thomas a few moments to remember what in the world Dakotah was talking about, but then he remembered and he let a small sigh escape his lips. He was going to open up to this girl, he knew it was more of a fact than a question; she just had something about her that made you want to spill all of your secrets. The boy was just afraid, the only person who he talked about this sort of stuff to was his therapist and even at that, he was paid to listen to Thomas whine and bitch. He was just afraid but he knew it was no use.

"Why I'm always so quiet? Well, have you ever noticed that no one really listens? They just nod their head at whatever you say, offer a few words and then move on because they want to talk. They don't really give a damn what you have to say, they just want to be heard. It's so rare to find someone that actually listens, that isn't just waiting for their turn to speak. I just don't really see the point in talking, when no one listens."

Thomas was almost shocked after he finished talking. Even Luke had never heard about this, they didn't talk about their inner thoughts a lot. He couldn't believe he had just dumped his thoughts on Dakotah, of all people. At that moment, he didn't think of how beautiful the city was, or how cold it was outside. The only thing he was thinking about was how he had let Dakotah Samuels see a glimpse of his mind and now he wasn't sure what she was going to do.

She didn't say much, though. Her gaze was once again fixed on the city below them, as if she could see through it, like she could see something that was invisible to Thomas's eyes. He stared at her now, at her porcelain face, her lips, her eyes, her everything. She was beautiful, no, she was more than that, but he could not explain it.

"Everyone is so damn fake." she finally spit out, almost making the boy jump. "They won't really speak their mind, they won't really wear what they'd like, and they won't be friends with people they really like. Everyone is tied down to this damn idea of what society is supposed to be like that most of us don't even have originality anymore. It's like we're all a bunch of robots, just following the flow and not raising a finger, not even when something seems wrong. It's all just so fake. And if you talk about this to anyone, they think you're psychotic. I'm so sick of it. Of all of this." she didn't even seem to realize that Thomas was still there, she seemed to be almost hypnotized and Thomas found that he agreed with every word she said. Whenever he said stuff like this to Luke, the latter would give him a type of look that suggested Thomas was completely crazy. When he talked about it to his therapist, he only tried to say that this was not true and start talking with words too complicated to even try to understand.

But Dakotah seemed to be on the same page that he was, and that was maybe the most wonderful realization he had ever had. He had just thought she was like all of the others, just going through life not really questioning anything, and not that there was anything really wrong with that, but he absolutely adored that Dakotah was different from all of them.

"Yeah, you're right, we live in a world of fakes. But, you got to remember one thing, we're fakes too." Thomas simply replied, a small smirk tugging at his lips while he wondered where this sudden courage came from.

Dakotah turned towards him, a small smile on her lips. She didn't reply, but once again she didn't need to speak, they understood each other. With those words, the two of them sat there and stared at the city, both just happy that they had found someone that understood.