Mature

I rolled over in bed and let out an annoyed groan. There was plenty of talking and noises going on within the bus. It slightly felt like they were all right by my bedroom. I took hold of my pillow and pulled it over my head, hoping to block out some of the noise. I peeked through the edge of the pillow at the clock and realized it was almost five o' clock in the morning.

I let my hand slide over to my side, but Devin had already gone. I looked up and let a low groan escape my lips. Where could he have gone at an hour like this? I was confused, but figured it had something to do with the tour. We were stopped, I knew that for certain. I could see lights flashing through the blinds on my windows, but I only shoved my head deeper into my pillow.

The noises continued on and never let me fall back asleep. I was becoming more curious than anything, especially when a gravelly voice started to shoosh everyone. I rolled out of bed and brushed my messy hair from my eyes. I pulled my glasses from my nightstand beside me and pushed them up my nose. As I stood I let a loud yawn escape my lips.

This noise better be worth something if I wasn't allowed to fall back asleep. I made my way to the curtain and lazily pushed it aside. I was surprised to see everyone up and awake. I rubbed my eyes with tired fists and slowly became very uneasy. The band was wide awake, along with Devin and Angela. They all sat huddled by the bathroom, where I found the door ripped open in the opposite direction.

I started to walk forward, but quickly stopped myself when I saw a woman in scrubs. Angela saw me first, which forced Zacky to turn in my direction. He let a small, forced smile to crawl along his lips as he grabbed my forearm lightly. I was begining to panic a little, but I couldn't be sure why. I tried to count heads, but I wasn't thinking straight. Someone was missing from the group. I looked up into Zacky's tired green eyes and asked, "What's going on, Zack?"

I tried to pull my arm from his grip, but he never let go. He stepped in front of me and let his head drop slightly. His hair fell into his eyes in a messy fashion as he took a deep breath. I swallowed hard before asking him again, "Zacky, what is going on?"

"Something happened, Hillari."He frowned.

I tried to pull my arm back away from him, but he refused to let go.

"Zacky, you're hurting me."I whimpered."What happened?"

"It's Jimmy."He sighed.

I let in a gasp as I put together the simple amount of pieces. The lights outside weren't passing street lights. They were the red and blues of important state cars. The bus didn't stop because we made it to the stadium; it stopped because we were at a hospital.

"Zacky,"I breathed.

"But it's okay!"He reassured.

I pushed passed Zacky, but he never released my arm.

"Zacky, let go!"The group turned in our direction as I threw a fist into his chest.

His eyes held a world of hurt as he finally let go of my arm. I turned away from him and pushed my way through the small crowd of people. Brian stepped forward and I accidently walked right into his open arms.

"Brian, let go of me."I whimpered.

"Hillari, go back to bed. This shit is crazy. Johnny got sick and he puked all over the living room. You don't want to see that."He tried to find a humorous laugh, but I knew all too well what was going on.

Brian tried walking me back toward my bedroom, but I angrily placed my hands on his chest and pushed him away. He stumbled slightly, since he didn't expect me to put my hands on him, and frowned.

"Hillari,"He stated it so softly, like he was afraid I was going to break."come on."

"What happened to Jimmy?"I pointed a finger in his direction and even though he tried to force a playful smile, I never fell for it."Brian."

"He's okay, Hillari."Brian gave in.

I walked passed Brian as well and took Devin tightly by the arm. He looked down at me with swollen, red eyes before pulling me into a hug. Devin had been upset. Devin never cries; he was my rock to lean on. If he broke then I would be quick to follow.

"Devin,"I whispered softly.

I could feel my eyes well up in tears at the situation. The nurse to our side continued to speak softly to Angela, who nodded her head and agreed with what she had to say. Being that I was pulled tightly into Devin's chest, his arms wrapped tightly around me, she only sounded muffled and unclear. I looked up into Devin's eyes and asked, "How is he?"

Devin let his head fall before placing a sweet kiss on the top of my head. He placed his chin on my head before stating, "I love you Hillari."

"Matt,"I couldn't bare to call him Shadows now."what happened?"

"He collapsed."His voice was sore and course."Devin found him."

I opened my mouth to speak, but just hearing those words set me into over drive. I felt my knees grow weak and want to buckle, but I stayed strong and standing. I swallowed the hard lump in my throat and could only muster out a quiet whimper of sadness. At that point, Devin had tightened his grip around me and rocked me softly.

I wasn't sure if the rocking was for his comfort or mine, but it didn't help me. I snaked my arms around Devin's waist and finally allowed my tears to fall. They stained his shirt as I looked up at the nurse. She gave me a soft, sorrowful smile before rubbing my arm gently. In a sweet, angelic voice, she said, "Don't worry sweetheart. He's going to be just fine."

I tried to clear my throat to speak, but I was speechless. I wanted to know from start to finish what happened to Jimmy, but no one knew for sure. How long had he been out cold? Did he try and call for help? Did Jimmy try to reach someone when he realized he was stuck? I tried to pull away from Devin, but he only held me tight in his arms.

I looked up at the nurse and asked, "How is he?"

"I'm not sure I should,"It must have been her hesitant answering, because I grew angry fast.

"I said how is he?!"Everyone turned in my direction at my sudden outburst.

With the strength I had left, I pushed away from Devin.

"I don't want hugs."I growled."I don't want kisses. I don't want fucking unwanted attention! I want to know how my fucking father is!"

"M'am, I need you to calm down,"The nurse choked.

"I - I know."I wiped down my face and let out an angry sigh."I'm his daughter. I need to know how he's doing."

"Like I said before, I don't know if I'm able to give out that infor -"She tried again, but it wasn't the answer I needed.

"Am I setting a funeral date or what?!"I rose my hands in anger, but not to strike.

I let out a grunt of pain as Matt tore me away from the nurse. Devin stepped over and apologized for my out bursts. The nurse accepted his apology and quickly went on her way. I looked up at Matt, who's eyes were also red and swollen under the stress and tears. His features quickly grew angry, but it was completely understandable.

I had lashed out at the nurse, who was only trying to help us. Angela pushed through Devin and Johnny before looking down at me. She seemed to be holding herself together, but I think it was for everyone else's sake. Quietly, she said, "You can't get angry because they don't know his status, Hillari. They're doing the best they can."

"I know, Angela."I said softly.

I rubbed my hands against my eyes, trying desperately to rid of my tears.

"I need to know what they're doing to him. I want to know everything that happened. I want to make sure he's okay."I hid my face in my hands when I realized I wasn't going anywhere soon.

"It's okay,"Matt pulled me into a warm hug and rubbed a hand down my back."he'll be okay."

Angela took my hand in hers before saying, "Give it a little bit of time, Hillari. He'll come out better than before."