August Is Over

“Mom?”
“Yeah, Lexi?” I asked with a soft sigh. I was doing her hair in a fish tale braid while we watched Hannah Montana. It was her favorite show ever, and I didn’t exactly hate it.
“I wanna act,”
I stopped and looked at her.
“Do you really, Lexi?”
My little brown haired girl turned and looked at me.
“Yeah,” She nodded. “I wanna be like Miley. I wanna act on Disney,”
I laughed.
“You can do whatever you want to do, Alexandra,” I stated, using her real name so that she would know that I was serious.
“What did you want to do when you were my age?” She asked, scooting in my lap. I smiled at her and wrapped my arms around her.
“I wanted to grow up and go to college. I wanted to eventually be a professional photographer for super models,”
Lexi stared at me.
“Why didn’t you?”
I hesitated. How do you exactly tell your child that you didn’t plan on having her so young? How do you tell your child that you couldn’t exactly go to college because you couldn’t afford it because of the high price of having a kid? I can’t tell Lexi that. That answer was pretty obvious, but what would I tell her until she’s ready to hear it?
“God had other plans for me, baby girl,” I smiled and cupped her chin in my hand. “I love you, and I never want you to give up your dreams, you hear me? Work hard, and you will get what you want in life. I may not be a photographer for super models, but I do love my job. I get to spend more time with you and your dad, and I get to do what I love. In the end, I love what I do more than I would if it actually turned out the other way,”
“You’re a good mom,” She laughed and hugged my neck tightly.
“You’re way too smart for your own good, Lexi-bear.” I shook my head. “I love you, little girl. Remember that forever, okay?”
“I know that you will, mommy. I’ll love you for forever too,” Lexi giggled. “Will you fix your hair like mine?”
I nodded and kissed her forehead.
“Yeah, I will,” I agreed.
“Will you teach me how to do it, momma?”
“I will. I know how fast you pick up on things,” I rolled my eyes.
“Okay,” She giggled.
I separated my hair to the side and I started to fish tale it, with Lexi watching patiently.
“Are you getting this?”
“Can I finish it?” She asked me hopefully.
“Yeah, but don’t let it unravel,” I teased playfully. I could always fix it if she did. She’s just six, but she would understand.
“I won’ttttt,”
I giggled and she finished the braid. I pulled my long, black hair over my shoulder to look at it. I was half shocked to see that it looked really good, and half of me expected it to look that good. As weird as it sounds, I did expected it.
“It looks good, baby girl,” I smiled widely at her.
Lexi jumped up quickly and wrapped her arms around my neck.
“Thank you for teaching me,”
“Next thing you know, you’ll be picking up a camera or guitar,” I joked with a wink.
“I wanna learn those too!” She stated, smiling widely. “I’m big enough, I swear! I got my first big kid tooth too,”
I shook my head at her, enjoying this moment.
“I know you do, silly,” I giggled. “As soon as you’re old enough to hold the camera properly, I’ll teach you how to use one,”
“Okay!” She laughed, her eyes lighting up.
Moments like this are the best in the world. Lexi and I are unbelievably close. She’s my precious little girl. I didn’t think that I could love a human being more than I love Alex, but it’s so true. She’s my little angel. Alexandra is the best thing that had honestly ever happened to me. She taught me how to grow up. I never want her to feel how I felt growing up with my snobby parents. Nanny after nanny, and eventually being kicked out for not listening to their rules, ended up being hell. I will never treat Lexi like that. If she came to me at 15, and told me that she was pregnant, I would hold her and promise her that everything would be alright. I can’t, no-I won’t turn on my own flesh and blood like my parents did.
“I love you, Lexi,” I stated, looking into her innocent eyes. “You will always come first, okay? Nothing will ever be above you,”
The little girl winkled her nose and nodded.
“I love you too, mommy,” She replied. “Now can we watching Beauty and The Beast?”
“Yeah, I’ll go get it,” I agreed.