My Heart Is In The Home

It was when Alex heard the sound of something dropping to the floor at the base of the stairs that he knew Jack meant he needed time. It was when he heard the light thud that he jumped from the couch and walked over to the doorway, seeing Jack slip his arms into his jacket. He could feel the tears forming and shakes his head when Jack looks at him. He tries to say to talk, tell Jack ‘please’ but somewhere between standing from the chair and standing in the doorway, his voice has disappeared. Jacks bits his lip and walks over to Alex wrapping his arms around the elder’s neck, pulling him close as Alex wraps his arms around Jack’s waist.

“I don’t want to lose you.” Alex sniffs, arms tightening their hold on Jack.

“You aren’t going to, Lex. I just… I need some space. I promise I’ll be back.” Jack assures him, pulling back with a sad smile.

“We-we’ll be okay, won’t we?” Alex asks, a desperate tone to his voice.

It’s silent for a few moments as the two men look at each other before Jack takes a deep breath and nods.

“We’ll be okay.” With that, Jack places a hand on Alex’s cheek, thumb stroking gently across the skin before pressing their lips together gently. “I’ll be back soon.”

*

Ten o’clock the next evening sees Alex spread out on the couch in his living room, the only source of light coming from the low glow of candles placed around the room. He hears the lock to the front door click and just for a moment, he thinks it’s Jack, his Jack, coming home to him. That is until he hears the soft call of his name coming from the hallway, snapping him back to reality.

“In here, Zee.” Is his reply as he moves into a sitting position, pulling the sleeves to his, well Jack’s hoodie down over his hands.

“How are you doing?” Zack asks as he sits down in the space next to Alex, the older boy curling into his side almost instantly.

“I miss him.” He whispers, fingers griping tightly into Zack’s t-shirt. It’s horrible for Zack to see Alex like this. They’ve been friends since high school and it never gets easier seeing his best friend this upset.

“I know you do. But.. You’ve just go to give him some space. It can’t be easy for him, Lex.”
“It isn’t easy for me either, you know.” Alex’s voice breaks as he speaks and he tries his hardest to stop himself from crying, but only a few seconds later, the first tear rolls down his cheek and he quickly wipes it away.

“I’m having a baby and the one person I need more than anything right now isn’t here because he’s scared. Scared of the responsibilities we’re going to have in a few months. He-he’s just left me, left us.”

“He said he was coming back though, remember? He promised you. He wouldn’t leave you or the baby. Jack’s not like that and you know he isn’t.” Zack tells him, his hand rubbing lightly at Alex’s waist.

It’s quiet for a while before Alex nods and tilts his head up to look at his friend. “C-can you stay for a while? I don’t want to be on my own right now.”

Zack rolls his eyes playfully, a small smile on his lips as his hold on Alex tightens slightly. “Like you need to ask.”

*

“This is going to be a little cold,” the nurse, Lucy, smiles as she pops the cap to the jelly like substance, squeezing a small amount onto Alex’s stomach. He takes a deep breath when the cool gel hits his stomach, laughing slightly as he says something about it being cold.

She rolls the probe over Alex’s lower stomach as she looks at the small screen just to the left of the bed Alex is laying on. It takes a few moments but then Alex sees her smiling and she turns the monitor to the side allowing Alex to see as she points to a small shape on the screen, telling him “that’s your baby.”

“Wow,” Alex breathes, not really sure what to make of the whole situation. “It’s tiny.”

Lucy sends Alex a smile, telling him that the size of the baby is good for 12 weeks and that everything looks okay. She makes a few notes on Alex’s chart before handing him 2 photos of the scan image.

“Will it just be you again on your next appointment?” She asks, standing as Alex walks towards the door.

“N-no. My boyfriend should be here next time.” Should being the word that Alex hopes will change.

“Oh, good. You’ll be able to see a lot of changes.” She smiles opening the door for Alex.

“Thank you,” he says, walking down the hallway, one hand on his stomach, the other holding the scan picture in front of him.

As soon as Alex returned home from his appointment, he gave one of the photos to Zack telling him to give it to Jack. He shows him where the baby is, making Zack promise to actually show Jack rather than just leaving him to guess. He received a text from Jack a few hours later. It was just a simple ‘thanks for the picture :) x’ but it made Alex’s heart flutter slightly. It was the first bit of contact that he had had with Jack since he left, but it still gave him a small bit of home that he’d be home soon.

*

It was three days later when Alex woke up that everything changed. He opened his eyes to see Jack lying next to him, a smile forming when he saw Alex looking back at him.

“What are you doing here?” Alex yawned, stretching his body as much as he could whilst in the position he was in.

“I promised you that I’d be back.”

“B-but why now?”

“When Zack came over to give me the picture, he didn’t just drop it off and leave. We spoke
for a little while. He told me that if you meant anything to me, I wouldn’t just leave you to deal with this on your own. You mean the world to me Alex and I’m so sorry that I left you.”

“I-it’s okay. You’re home now.” Alex tells him, frowning when Jack shakes his head.

“It’s not okay, Lex. The way I reacted was stupid. I don’t know why that even happened…” Jack trailed off, pulling the covers away from Alex, smiling when he whined as the cold air hit him.

“What are you doing Jay?” Jack ignored Alex’s question, shuffling down the bed so he could lift Alex’s shirt up his body slightly. He brought his hand out, swallowing as he rested it gently on Alex’s stomach.

“Hello baby, it’s your daddy. I’m sorry I’ve been a bit of an idiot the past few weeks, that’s not gonna happen again. I want you to know that I’m going to be here forever from now on, okay?” Alex reached out to trace his fingers along Jack’s cheek, the younger turning to place a kiss in his palm. “Just the three of us, always.”

And yeah, Alex knew that from that moment that everything would be oaky. He had Jack and a baby on the way and that was all that mattered.