What Could and Never Will Be

“Advance potions, advance charms, advance herbology, and advance transfigurations all in one day. I’m going to go crazy!” “Anyone who has to say advance that many times is crazy” Celine laughed buttering her toast. “That’s what you get for wanting to be a healer and becoming a secrete genius” “I’ve always known want I wanted to do and I worked hard for it. I just want to help people” Celine gave me that all knowing look.

Most people who say they want to be a healer they want to work at St. Margos or in a school as a nurse. Some even want to do freelance, helping the people that can’t afford to get help. I would love to do any of those things, but I know that’s not going to happen. Even know I say that’s what I’m going to do Celine and my family are the only people that really know who I’m going to be helping. The death eaters. That is why Celine gives me that look every time the subject of me becoming a healer pops up in conversation. She thinks that I’m lying to myself. But I always look on the bright side. There people to, and there still our family. No matter what way you look at it.

I looked over at Draco to see him staring off into space. I took his class times table that was sitting next to him. “We have potions together today and we’ll have defense against the dark arts together” I set my hand on his shoulder. He looked at me. I was a bit worried about him. School has just started and Draco seemed so distant. “That’s nice. Maybe you can help me with my potions” “Yeah I can do that” he gave me a weak smile and went back to his breakfast.

I walked into the common room to see Celine but not the boys. “Where are the boys?” “I’m not quite sure” and she went back to doing her homework. I took a seat next to her and pulled out my potion book “Have you noticed how strange Draco’s been acting?” Celine asked “I guess I haven’t really looked much into it” “It’s incredibly strange” “Yeah but think about the family he comes from” “True”

Celine and I sat in the commons doing our homework and doing our typical girl talk. Till the boys walked in. “Oh hey babe” Levi leant over and gave Celine a sweat kiss on the cheek. I watched Draco walk into the boy’s dormitory. “So you girls ready” “For what” we said in unison “Dinner?” he looked at us as if we were crazy. “It’s already dinner” I started putting my books away “Wow time flies” Celine started to do the same. We got up and started to leave. “Shouldn’t we wait for Draco?” “Naw he’s not coming he said he had a lot of homework to get a head start on” that does not sound like him. Celine gave me that ‘I told you so’ look.

I guess Draco really has been acting strange lately. Now that I think of it last night adds to it. I overlooked the fact that he never did tell me what he was doing out so late. At the time I thought he was just being Draco. Out late, spacing out, not going to dinner, he was oddly quite during potions class even with Harry Potter in it, I haven’t seen or heard him ridicule the first years, and Levi told Celine and I that Draco quit quidditch. Besides the fact that all this has happened in less than forty-eight hours he hasn’t said much to Levi about anything and he hasn’t said a word about it to me.

Ever since fourth year Draco and I have grown very close as friends. All four of us have really. It was during a death eater meeting that was being held at my house when I found him sitting alone in one of the guest rooms. He was the only kid that was brought to the meeting. Well besides me because I live there. Besides the few encounters that normally lead to a few choose words, we haven’t really ever actually had a real conversation.

“May I ask what you’re doing in here?” “I could ask you the same thing?” “This is my house” “Then why are you in the guest room?” I walked over to the closet, which is where I was heading in the first place, and opened it. It was full of my school stuff. Old books, new books, robes, dress robes even my trunk. It was full of the stuff I didn’t need in my room. “Oh” “Yeah, now you?” “What?” “What are you doing in here?” I sat in the middle of the bed as he was in the chair next to the window “I came to clear my mind” it was the most honest thing I have ever heard him say. “It gets pretty overwhelming” he gave me a questioning look “What does?” “Having parents like ours” he nodded his head in agreement.

My view on Draco changed that night. That was the night our friendship started and since then it has only grown. That night no one took jabs at each other, we just sat peacefully having a civil conversation. Any relationship with Draco is an unconventional relationship, if you’re not one of his goons that is. I don’t think anyone, myself including, thought that Draco could ever have actual friends.