Somewhere Only We Know.
i'm getting old and i need something to rely on.
It’s Zack’s eighteenth birthday today. It’s a school day; Wednesday.
His plans would have, ordinarily, been to spend it with his three best friends, Alex, Jack and Rian. It’s the last one he’ll be able to spend with them –they’ll all be at college this time next year.
Except Zack, he’s starting early. He’s going to Penn State for the summer sessions. When school is over, he probably won’t be able to spend much time with the other three boys any more.
Today, however, he has seen Rian and Alex for a grand total of two minutes combined, and they managed to rush out a happy birthday each before they had to rush off to homeroom together –he swears there’s something going on between them, they’re just doing a surprising job of keeping quiet.
He hadn’t seen Jack at all (he hadn’t been in homeroom, which was unusual) for the entire day, up until he sees him outside his locker with Holly during lunch.
“Jack?” He says hesitantly, taking a step towards the taller boy. “Can I talk to you for a second?”
Jack extricates himself from Holly’s grip and turns to the smaller, curly haired blonde boy.
“Yeah?”
“Can we go out tonight? To the usual spot?” Zack asks tentatively.
Jack hesitates, sucks in a breath before nodding.
“Yeah, sure. I’ll meet you there. Seven?”
Zack nods, smiling softly and shyly.
“I’ll bring blankets.”
Zack arrives at ‘the usual spot’ in good spirits. ‘The usual spot’ is, as such, just an open clearing in the middle of a forest, far away enough from all the trees and plants to start a fire without danger, but there’s enough thin grass, bracken and logs on the ground to sit and talk comfortably.
He arrives at six thirty, a half hour before Jack said he’d be here. He has time to lay out the blankets (he snuck in a few beers from his dad’s stock too) and make a small, but warming fire before it turns seven. He settles himself against a log and watches the flames flicker absently.
It reaches seven thirty and Jack still hasn’t arrived. Zack frowns to himself for a minute, before reaching over and cracking open a beer. It’s not like Jack to be late.
It’s eight thirty when Jack remembers that he meant to meet Zack an hour and a half ago. He tugs himself from Holly again (they had been spooning on her bed and watching Disney movies) and fumbles around with his shoes and jacket.
“Jay? What are you doing?”
“I meant to,” He pauses as he stumbles whilst fastening his laces, “meet Zack an hour or so ago. I –fuck- I’m sorry, I can’t leave him again.”
“Again?”
Jack looks at her guiltily for a second before leaning in and pressing a kiss to her forehead, pointedly missing her lips before sighing.
“I’ll explain later.”
It’s almost nine fifteen when Jack finally gets to the clearing. At first glance, he thinks Zack isn’t there. There’s what remains of a fire –ashen wood and charred leaves- a few beer bottles and a blanket, but the older boy is nowhere to be seen.
Jack spots a movement at the edge of the trees then, and he steps gingerly toward it.
“Zack?”
The shape turns then, and it’s Zack, just like Jack had hoped. He didn’t completely screw up.
At least, he didn’t think he had, until he sees Zack’s tears.
“I wanted a minute, Jack,” He says, his voice shaking and nervous, “that was all I needed. One minute.”
Jack feels his eyes start to sting –he hasn’t seen Zack look this vulnerable in years.
“I just –I just wanted us to be like we were, before –before Holly. I’m leaving in a few months, Jack. You’ll never have to see me again.” Zack looks away from the younger boy, his tears overpowering him as he stares at the floor. “I’ll miss you. All three of you. Although, I don’t suppose any of you will miss me.”
Jack reaches out and cautiously grips Zack’s shoulders. The older boy looks up; meets Jack’s eyes for a fraction of a second.
“Look at me.” Jack says sadly, softly. The blonde boy looks at him again.
“I’ll miss you.”
Zack laughs quietly.
“No you won’t. You have Holly.”
He brushes the taller boy’s hands from him and moves away, making towards the path to the edge of the forest.
Jack pauses for a moment, fumbling with his words for a second. He curses himself as Zack looks back at him for a moment and he stays silent.
Zack takes the first step onto the path. Jack licks his lips –nervous habit.
Zack takes another step –he’s nearly out of sight already.
“I don’t want Holly.”
Zack hesitates. Jack swallows nervously and sits on the nearest hollow log.
“I need you.”
Zack turns, stares at Jack for a moment. He wipes his eyes. Jack watches him, pauses for a moment, stands up again.
Zack runs. Lands himself in Jack’s arms, the younger boy holding his hips gently while his own tie around his neck.
Jack smiles, leaning in and pressing a kiss to Zack’s lips. The blonde boy blushes, cheeks tinted soft pink, and buries his face in Jack’s neck.
Jack smiles. His heart swells gently in his chest.
“I missed this.”
He feels Zack smile against his skin.
“Hell, I guess I just missed you.”
His plans would have, ordinarily, been to spend it with his three best friends, Alex, Jack and Rian. It’s the last one he’ll be able to spend with them –they’ll all be at college this time next year.
Except Zack, he’s starting early. He’s going to Penn State for the summer sessions. When school is over, he probably won’t be able to spend much time with the other three boys any more.
Today, however, he has seen Rian and Alex for a grand total of two minutes combined, and they managed to rush out a happy birthday each before they had to rush off to homeroom together –he swears there’s something going on between them, they’re just doing a surprising job of keeping quiet.
He hadn’t seen Jack at all (he hadn’t been in homeroom, which was unusual) for the entire day, up until he sees him outside his locker with Holly during lunch.
“Jack?” He says hesitantly, taking a step towards the taller boy. “Can I talk to you for a second?”
Jack extricates himself from Holly’s grip and turns to the smaller, curly haired blonde boy.
“Yeah?”
“Can we go out tonight? To the usual spot?” Zack asks tentatively.
Jack hesitates, sucks in a breath before nodding.
“Yeah, sure. I’ll meet you there. Seven?”
Zack nods, smiling softly and shyly.
“I’ll bring blankets.”
Zack arrives at ‘the usual spot’ in good spirits. ‘The usual spot’ is, as such, just an open clearing in the middle of a forest, far away enough from all the trees and plants to start a fire without danger, but there’s enough thin grass, bracken and logs on the ground to sit and talk comfortably.
He arrives at six thirty, a half hour before Jack said he’d be here. He has time to lay out the blankets (he snuck in a few beers from his dad’s stock too) and make a small, but warming fire before it turns seven. He settles himself against a log and watches the flames flicker absently.
It reaches seven thirty and Jack still hasn’t arrived. Zack frowns to himself for a minute, before reaching over and cracking open a beer. It’s not like Jack to be late.
It’s eight thirty when Jack remembers that he meant to meet Zack an hour and a half ago. He tugs himself from Holly again (they had been spooning on her bed and watching Disney movies) and fumbles around with his shoes and jacket.
“Jay? What are you doing?”
“I meant to,” He pauses as he stumbles whilst fastening his laces, “meet Zack an hour or so ago. I –fuck- I’m sorry, I can’t leave him again.”
“Again?”
Jack looks at her guiltily for a second before leaning in and pressing a kiss to her forehead, pointedly missing her lips before sighing.
“I’ll explain later.”
It’s almost nine fifteen when Jack finally gets to the clearing. At first glance, he thinks Zack isn’t there. There’s what remains of a fire –ashen wood and charred leaves- a few beer bottles and a blanket, but the older boy is nowhere to be seen.
Jack spots a movement at the edge of the trees then, and he steps gingerly toward it.
“Zack?”
The shape turns then, and it’s Zack, just like Jack had hoped. He didn’t completely screw up.
At least, he didn’t think he had, until he sees Zack’s tears.
“I wanted a minute, Jack,” He says, his voice shaking and nervous, “that was all I needed. One minute.”
Jack feels his eyes start to sting –he hasn’t seen Zack look this vulnerable in years.
“I just –I just wanted us to be like we were, before –before Holly. I’m leaving in a few months, Jack. You’ll never have to see me again.” Zack looks away from the younger boy, his tears overpowering him as he stares at the floor. “I’ll miss you. All three of you. Although, I don’t suppose any of you will miss me.”
Jack reaches out and cautiously grips Zack’s shoulders. The older boy looks up; meets Jack’s eyes for a fraction of a second.
“Look at me.” Jack says sadly, softly. The blonde boy looks at him again.
“I’ll miss you.”
Zack laughs quietly.
“No you won’t. You have Holly.”
He brushes the taller boy’s hands from him and moves away, making towards the path to the edge of the forest.
Jack pauses for a moment, fumbling with his words for a second. He curses himself as Zack looks back at him for a moment and he stays silent.
Zack takes the first step onto the path. Jack licks his lips –nervous habit.
Zack takes another step –he’s nearly out of sight already.
“I don’t want Holly.”
Zack hesitates. Jack swallows nervously and sits on the nearest hollow log.
“I need you.”
Zack turns, stares at Jack for a moment. He wipes his eyes. Jack watches him, pauses for a moment, stands up again.
Zack runs. Lands himself in Jack’s arms, the younger boy holding his hips gently while his own tie around his neck.
Jack smiles, leaning in and pressing a kiss to Zack’s lips. The blonde boy blushes, cheeks tinted soft pink, and buries his face in Jack’s neck.
Jack smiles. His heart swells gently in his chest.
“I missed this.”
He feels Zack smile against his skin.
“Hell, I guess I just missed you.”