Love , It's Just For Fun

“What’s up?” I asked trying to look solemn, but that was easy given-away as just before I said that I took an unconvincing gulp.

‘We need to talk’ some of the most hated words in the memoirs of Violetta Elizabeth
Stephenson. Right above the names of hearts I’ve broken and also the ones that broke mine. I started to think about what John could possibly want to talk about.

I narrowed it down to the fact a day into our relationship I kinda pashed Kenny
Not intentionally!..it just kinda happened.

“Walk with me Vee” was all he said.
He took my hand and we walked in silence. I had no idea where and what direction we were walking in – all I do know is that my guilty conscience was taking over me.

~~

John

I decided to pick Vee up from school instead of her having to suffer with Garrett and his un-holy whining about Katie. That and well I needed to tell her about Kennedy.

It’s gonna be hard going on tour with the person you love along with someone else who’s in like of the one you love.

I tried to stall for a while as I gathered up the nerve to tell her why I was here.

Violetta Stephenson is not stupid. I had a feeling she would pick up on a legit reason for me to be here, but not quickly.

“Vee we need to talk” I told her trying not to give it away so easily.

Her facial expression changed from that ‘happy to see you’ to ‘dear god what happened’

All I could think about at this moment in time was whether or not this was the right time to tell her about Kennedy having feelings for her.

But if I didn’t tell her now, I’d have trouble looking at the two of them on the same tour bus for a few months let me tell you that.

“What’s up?” she asked giving me that innocently-concerned look. It was partly adorable; but I wasn’t gonna tell her that.

I couldn’t think well at that moment.

And it couldn’t have been at a better time right?

So I could think up something to tell her that actually made a bit of sense, I went with the easiest option for me to go with at that time.

“Walk with me Vee”

I didn’t even know where we were walking to ; to begin with. All I knew is that this was kinda just a diversion.

I could see she was panicking in the end.

But I didn't understand why at first; then she told me something that made my heart feel like it shattered into tiny little pieces.

“Before we go any further..I-I need to tell you something”
I had to stop her from going any further.
I just couldn’t let her.

~~

“Before we go any further..I-I need to tell you something” I said.

I couldn’t possibly be in this situation where I didn’t tell John about what happened between me and Kenny. I..I just couldn’t.

“Alright..” he said as we finally stopped walking.

“But first..” John interrupted just as he sat down on a bit of concrete that sat right behind the ASU sign that was located at the front of campus.

I had no idea we walked that far.

He signalled me to come and join him, me being me I decided to. Mainly because well, it’s a common courtesy..right?

“But first..I really have to tell you this”

So much for me speaking.

He looked at me plainly when he said that. I didn’t exactly know how I should’ve looked. Should I have looked woeful ? upset ? content?

“I have no idea in hell how I’m gonna tell you this though Vee, let’s be honest here.”
I could feel that this was a breakup .. I could just feel.

“Let me start you off John..I think I’ve kinda been in this situation more than you have” I chuckled nervously.

He looked at me oddly for a few seconds , but he played along.

“Okay let’s pretend I’m you for a second alright?”

I then took a dramatic deep-breath earning John’s signature chuckle.

“Vee, I’m sorry but things just aren’t working out..I hope we can still be friends”

“Bravo!..those drama lessons really payed out” he clapped.

“But that’s not what this is about”

“It’s not?”

“No..well really it’s how you take this more than anything”

“John please just get to the point I’m not getting any younger”

“Well neither am I girl who’s two years younger than me” he yelled, causing the few people who were still on campus to stop and stare.

There was a hint of tension-filled silence.

“Kennedy..Kennedy has feelings for you Vee” he said cautiously and silently.
He then looked me straight in the eye. I couldn’t help but tell him that I knew – to spare future outbreaks.

“I-I-I know..”

“You know? But how?”

“John..just before Kenny and Gabi broke up yet again.” I took a little pause for solemnity.

“..before Kenny and Gabi broke up, remember when I went to Tessa’s ?”

All John did was nod, mainly because well y’know he was hearing my end of the story.

“It kinda..came out there.”

“What..what do you mean..how?”

“It kinda spilled when Gabi & I had a bit of an outburst”

He nervously laughed at it and I just gave him a little grimacing look.

“What?!” I jokingly punched him in the arm saying so.

“You two never liked each other huh?

“Was it that obvious?”

“Uhh yeah kinda” he smiled.

“Now that that’s out in the open...What did you want to tell me Vee?”

The only thing I could think about was how calm he was acting. Key word – acting. Could this all have been just a decoy from what he really feels about me already knowing of Kenny’s feelings towards me.

“Nothing..it’s nothing babe”

I tried to look as innocent as I possibly could without giving too much away.

“Well it must’ve been important enough for you to bring it up” he told me as I moved my head so that it was leaning on his shoulder. Just as I did so, I felt his arm wrap around me
He gently rubbed my shoulder and started to whisper before I could speak a word.

“But I’m sure you’ll tell me when you’re ready” he said; most likely giving me a guilt-trip.
He said something that would’ve taken a lot of guts to say in the beginning and I..I chickened out.

Giving him a plain look I took in a deep sigh.

“Y’know, it was kinda hot when you called me babe,”

“Compliment or..”

“What else would it be?”

“John I swear you’re such a hopeful romantic” I laughed lightly.

“Funny you never thought of it as a compliment when we weren’t dating”

“That’s because we weren’t dating genius”

“Touché”

I felt that these words, all that was said tonight was all forced. I can’t explain how or why – it just came instantly apparent to me. We continued to stay on campus for a while; that while meaning up until we get the frantic call to pick up food on our way back home.

“We don’t have to go and get those idiots food..” John detested proving that he didn’t exactly want to leave his position on the ground.

“Mhmm.. “

“C’mon Vee..those baby’s are old enough to get their own food” he then whined.

“That’s true..but I think it’s best we go anyway”

“Vee you’re such a k.j”

“And that’s why you love me now c’mon”

**

“We come baring pizza and alchahol” John yelled as we walked through the front door of the apartment.

“About fucking time” Garrett pried as he opened of the boxes out of John’s hands and took a slice.

“Where’s Katie?” I asked moving off into the hallway so I could get to my bedroom and out of these clothes that reeked of sweat mixed with car air-freshener. Not exactly a good mix – aloe deodorant , sweat and vanilla musk all in one.

“Bedroom” Garrett answered with a mouthful of food and not looking all the more concerned over the whereabouts of his girlfriend.

“Katie ?” I knocked on the pine door.

There was no answer – only light sobbing.

I took that as an objective to go inside, well considering it was already unlocked to begin with.

“Katie what’s wrong?” I said sitting myself down on her bed to comfort her.

“Nothing..nothing’s wrong”

“Katelynn”

“Violetta..”

At that second she pulled out her phone and started typing away on this note option that came with the device.

‘Katie, it’s Evan..I know, I know , it’s been ages since we last spoke. And yet again, I fucked up with the time difference between here and the US. But that’s not what this is about, it’s dad. I know that we aren’t exactly on any terms with him..but he’s in hospital; I won’t go into further detail over the phone. All I’ll say is that his state is pretty critical. I’ll tell you more when you get here'

“Gare and I .. we went out for a while, y’know when you were still at school,” she whispered unintentionally. “Evan got the timing bad and well..here we are now”

“Evan..as in older brother Evan ? Wild child Evan?”

Katie nodded as she got one of the pillows surrounding her and rested her elbows on it and folding her arms.

“So this is how he found out about England?,”

“Pretty much..,”

“And the thing is..I kinda didn’t know the reason of me being needed in England up until hearing that message. My older fucking brother decides only to call now and give me the reason..” she tried to speak calmly but ended up breaking down.

“My daddy’s in hospital”

“There there, everything will be okay,” I said taking her under my arm’s protection, keeping one of the youngest and most fragile soul’s at ease.

“That’s easy for you to say..”

It’s true, this was easier said than done.

“So what happened with you and Garrett?”

“..it’s been a while since I kinda spoke to Evan, a little bit of a problem with voice recognition and the fact I kept something this big away from him”

“And in term’s I’ll understand?”

“Break..Vee, we’re on a break”

“What do you mean by break..exactly?”

I suddenly felt my brain deteriorate by the second. It’s like my brain wasn’t exactly functioning as well as it could’ve been. All these questions that came out, even a 5 year old would’ve understood hands-down. But I guess we all have our off-days.

If I thought mine was bad enough with that whole ordeal with John; there’s Katie & Garrett’s relationship on the brink, Katie’s dad being in hospital & the fact there was no trust given

“Look, a relationship’s just not what the two of us need at this moment in time..”

“I should’ve seen this coming, you two are just too loved up”

“Plus I think it’ll be easier to explain to whoever I have left in my family than explaining why I have a tattoo in a visible place”

“I guess so..hey I’ll be back alright?” I said before I left Katie alone in her room.

I decided that I’d slap some sense into Garrett, but by the time I got to the kitchen, seems like John already was.

“Dude, that is a fucked up reason to leave her hanging”

“What was I supposed to do? I can’t undo what I’ve done”

“Fuck man, her own father is in hospital and so fucking what a guy called for Katie – it was her brother for fuck’s sake”

“But she could’ve told me she never got along with her dad”

I honestly never seen this side of either of them before. I didn’t interrupt – I didn’t want to get even more involved than I already was.

“How does that have anything to do with this?...”

“Of all time’s Garrett – you choose when she’s at her worst. Like you said to James, grow some balls”

“I can’t take back what I've fucking done”

“Dammit Nickelsen you’re worst than a girl on her pms”

“How the hell do you even know what a pms is John?”

I couldn’t help but grimace when I heard that.

“I’ve known Vee and Katie for a fucking long time.. I kinda know what it is”

“News flash, so have I”

“Yeah well unlike some people, I actually talked to her when I met her..a little more than did in the beginning..yep, I still remember that”

I couldn’t take it anymore. As much as I felt Garrett deserved what was coming towards him, at the same time I felt for him as well.

“John that’s enough” I finally stepped in. “It’s not worth it” I whispered to him.

I could hear John heavily breathe, not in a panting kind of way; but in a ‘God he will pay’ kind of way.

We slowly diverted our attention to the clock, it read 11:21pm in analogue and because the room had a sudden silence , you could hear it ticking.

“Look, it’s kinda getting late” John said giving no one any eye contact. “I’m gonna get a cab home.. I’ll see you soon” he said and walked out the door, grabbing his things and a slice of pizza.

I felt helpless. I couldn’t feel any type of emotion. Solemnity.

Walking towards the door to shut it firmly, in the corner of my eye I see Garrett laying on the couch with his two hands covering his face in shame.

As I slowly walked to my room, he moved his hands and we made the shortest amount of eye contact.

Eye contact and a face that yelled what have I done ?

Somehow..I have a feeling this isn't gonna end well.