Balls of Steel

Her name was Michelle and she was my best friend. Through thick and thin I promised I'd be there for her, but that fell through when we went to the year twelve blow-off-steam party after exams.

After a long week of exams that seemed to determine our future but was really a bunch of shit the school put us through, we headed together to what felt like the party of the year.

In a sense, it was. Everyone - at least, every year twelve that we both knew - was there. The druggies were smoking in the front with no shame, joined by the head (female) bitch and her followers. The A-Grade football squad were joined by the hot female geeks, having an impromptu water fight as they ran up and down the street.

The cheerleaders and the outcasts split up and spoke together in small groups, passing a bottle of iced beer and pure vodka between them.

On every other day if you'd told me that the cheerleaders and the outcasts were sitting together, I would have laughed in your face. As it appeared, when us seniors only had less than a month between us we were going to take advantage of that opportunity and spend the rest of the time we had, together. It felt good to know that despite the labels, at the end of the day we, as seniors would stick together.

Of course that would change as soon as we got to college, but I never said we were perfect.

And then there was me and Michelle, two best friends who could take on the world.

We strolled into the kitchen and picked up two bottles of beer, heading into the living room where a group of both guys and girls were playing Spin the Bottle. Yep, our way of blowing off steam was controlled through the power of hormones.

Michelle beckoned me to play, and after a minute or two of thought I joined the game.

I distantly knew some of the people we were playing with: Mick, from Algebra - we had swapped answers during tests on several occasions, Tony - Michelle hooked up with him in junior high, Angela - my ex. next door neighbour, Naomi - I saved her ass when she got busted with weed at school (telling the teacher that another teacher was growing it. It wasn't true, but he was a perv so it worked out for the both of us. Plus, no one complained that he was fired), and five others or so.

After taking a swig of beer, the bottle was spun and Michelle and Mick were picked. Michelle and Mick stood up and headed upstairs - Michelle winked at me and I smiled in return - go get some, girl!

We waited before we continued playing for Michelle and Mick to come back, and it was quicker than we expected. Michelle practically ran down the stairs without taking a backwards glance at me. I frowned - what was wrong?

I felt my phone vibrate, and I picked it up and read the text from Michelle:
Going 2 get a tan if u care.

As rude as it seemed, I rolled my eyes and slid my phone back into my pocket. Every time we went to a party this was what happened: Michelle would hook up - or try to - she'd get rejected, and she'd blow up on me - claiming that I didn't care about her or whatnot. I cared about her so much, she was my best friend, why wouldn't I? But Michelle didn't seem to think that was a good answer, so she'd ignore me for the rest of the night.

The first three times that this occurred I comforted her, told her she was too good for those guys and they're missing out on something amazing - but she glared at me and told me to fuck off.

The next day she made me apologise for being a lousy friend and we were inseparable again.

"I'll send you my love on a wire, lift you up every time everyone pulls away from you"

After a solid half an hour of playing Spin the Bottle, I left the group to it and went outside in search of Michelle.

She was sitting alone, basking in the last sun rays that were about to go down at sunset. Her dress was off and she sat on the grass in her bikini, while some footballers checked her out appreciatively. I flipped them the finger and sat down next to Michelle.

Before I had a chance to comfort her - once again - she spoke.

"As soon as we got upstairs, Mick was coming on to me and I was thinking, no way. He's such a scumball; you never mentioned that to me."

I raised an eyebrow. "That's because he's not a scumball. Mick's in my math class, remember? Super genius, tells me I have a 'hot' personality and that we're going to get married one day? He may be an oddball, but not a scumball."

I knew Michelle was lying, that she in fact had come on to him - too strongly, I assumed (Michelle tended to do that) - and Mick pushed her away. I wasn't sure why he played in the first place if he knew he was going to get some but I pushed that meaningless thought aside.

At parties, she did this too - come on to guys who quickly rejected her, then played off the situation as though it was the other way around. Clearly, Michelle had a problem with her pride but I wasn't going to say anything about it - if she wanted to twist words around, that was her problem, not mine.

"Now that the truth is just a rule that you can bend, you crack the whip, shape-shift and trick, the past again"

Michelle sighed and continued to rant about Mick, but I tuned her out as I thought about our friendship. School was coming to an end and I didn't want any fights that would continue into our 'college' life. Michelle in one word was complicated, and I wasn't sure whether I wanted that kind of drama in my life.

She had pride problems, self-esteem issues and all around needed to work on her friendship issues. They may seem like little things to anyone else but I was sick of her constant negativity and quite simply, wanted to get away.

I tuned back in to the one-sided conversation, she was now on about her ego and how she wasn't going to be bruised. She must have admitted to her fail of a hook up with Mick. Inwardly I rolled my eyes; she always changed her story to appeal to me. It pissed me off. Sick and tired of her constant mood changes and overall bullshit, I silently walked away from her.

"got balls of steel, got an automobile...”