Once Again

“Jimmy, you knew this day was coming,” Brian sighed as he sat in the conference room.

“I know, doesn’t mean I still don’t like it.” Jimmy muttered, sitting back in his chair, looking around at his best friend.

“Have you guys heard anything yet?” Matt asked from across the table.

“Nope, she goes in for a test tomorrow morning, but we won’t find out the results for about a week. We’ll be on the road by then so I’ll have to be told over the fucking phone.”

“How’s Raven holding up?”

“Barely,” Jimmy whispered, his head falling backward on the chair. The rest took that as a sign that he didn’t really want to talk about it, so they decided to end the meeting to go spend time with family before the tour started in four days.

“See you later man,” Brian said to Jimmy, who just waved his hand, not attempting to move at all. Brian looked up at Matt, who was watching from the door way with a slight frown on his face.

“Jimmy, what’s up?” Matt asked, shutting the door and turning back around. “Is there something else going on with Raven?” Before Jimmy could reply, his phone started ringing.

“Jimmy, you have to come quickly,” Cameron said, her voice making it obvious she was fighting back panic.

“What happened?” Jimmy asked, sitting up automatically.

“Raven collapsed again, in the middle of the store. It’s not like last time either, she’s weaker.”

“Fuck, I’m on my way,” Jimmy muttered, snapping his phone shut and standing up.

“We heard, but you’re not leaving here until you settle the fuck down,” Matt said, standing in front of the door.

“I have to go get my daughter.” Jimmy growled.

“Not until you calm down bro,” Brian agreed with Matt, moving to stand in front of the door as well. “Cameron is freaking out now, if you’re freaking out, then she’ll freak even more.”

“If you need to let things out before you go over there, fucking do it.” Matt said, stepping up to his best friend. “Dude, trust me and Brian on this. You two have been friends since we were fucking twelve years old. We all pretty much grew up together. We’ve seen you through the hardest times of your life. We know you’re holding back to appear strong. We know you’re fucking strong, but you can only hold back for so long.”

“You want me to let it out, fine. It might not be that shocking to you, but I’m scared as fuck right now! I don’t want to go on this tour because I don’t want to get a phone call saying that my daughter died on me while I was away!” Jimmy snapped. “I want my daughter healthy, but we don’t even know if this plan is going to work. If it doesn’t, then I have no idea what else to do. I’ll be fucking lost if I lose my little girl. Can either of you fucking help me when my own flesh and blood is being put six feet under the fucking ground?”

“You might not believe this, but I fucking would,” Brian snapped back. “I know there’s a slight difference, but I’ve grown to care for McKenna probably a hell of a lot more than a brother would care for a sister. Almost like a niece or daughter of my own. Zack! Look at fucking Zack! His sister had Gavin and is having another one. He cares for his nephew like the boy is his own son! How do you think he would feel if something happened to little man? Probably the same way you’ll feel if Raven doesn’t make it. The same way I would feel if something happened to Kenna.”

Jimmy listened closely to what Brian had told him, and realized he was right.

“She’s a fighter Jimmy, just like Cameron, just like you.” Matt spoke up. “If you lose her, you’ll get over it in time. Maybe not fully, but you’ll still get over it enough to continue living. Same with Cameron. She’ll be fine after time goes by. I’m hoping like hell you don’t have to go through it. That none of us have to go through it, but if it happens, then it happens.”

“You guys are right, as usual.” he finally sighed. “I really need to go now you guys. I have to go get Raven.”

“Go,” Matt said, moving aside to let Jimmy through. They watched him run down the hallway and disappear in the elevator.

“This is getting old,” Brian muttered. “Something has got to give for them.”

“I know,” Matt agreed, but he knew that only time would reveal everything. Time to tell if all that Cameron and Jimmy had gone through worked out, and time to see if Raven can survive until it happens.

/

“It worked Jimmy,” Cameron stated over the phone about a month later. “I’m pregnant.” Jimmy didn’t really know what to say, so he just gasped and laughed. “We’re closer,” Cameron stated.

“We already agreed, if you do end up pregnant again and nothing helps Raven, it doesn’t matter. We’ll love the baby just as much as we have loved Raven.”

“I know,” Cameron said, smiling slightly as she watched her daughter in the bed. After the last time she collapsed, Raven was put on bed rest and was only allow to get up use the bathroom and take a bath.

“Look Mommy!” Raven exclaimed, holding up the picture she just colored.

“What is that?” Cameron asked, placing her phone between her shoulder and her hear so she could hold the picture to see it better.

“That’s you, and Daddy, and me, and my baby brother.”

“You told her already?” Jimmy asked, though he wasn’t too shocked.

“Had to didn’t I?” Cameron replied with a slight laugh. “Baby, it’s too soon to tell if the baby is a boy or girl.”

“I want a baby brother.” Raven said.

“I’m shocked, most girls say they want a baby sister.” Jimmy muttered. Zack, who was sitting across from him on the bus, snorted a laugh.

“Gavin wanted a brother, he was really disappointed when Zina told him the baby’s going to be a girl.” he stated.

“Thank you Zacky,” Jimmy said, winking at his friend. Zack just shrugged and went back to what he was doing on the laptop.

“Well, I better get off here. I still have to call the OB/GYN,” Cameron sighed.

“Get on that baby,” Jimmy agreed. He hesitated a minute before throwing out a quick “I love you.”

“I love you too,” Cameron smiled, shocking Jimmy completely. “Be safe, see you when you get home.”

“You’ll be getting ready to have that baby by that time,” Jimmy growled. “But you too, take care of yourself and our monkeys.”

“I will.” Cameron said before hanging up the phone. Jimmy snapped his own phone shut before letting his head fall backward on the couch. He picked his phone back up and dialed his parents number.

“Hi honey, how’s the tour going?” Barbra asked when she picked up the phone.

“As well as can be expected,” Jimmy replied as the bus ran over a pot hole, sending him and Zack forward in their seats. “I just wanted to let you know I got a call from Cameron. She found out it worked. She’s now pregnant.”

“That’s really good to hear, but Jimmy, just be sure you don’t neglect the child if something happens to Raven.”

“I’m not going to Mom. This is my chance to make up for not being there for Raven.”

“You can’t do that with a new baby James,” Barbra sighed. “The new baby isn’t going to be like Raven. He or she will need the same things Raven needed, but their personalities are going to be completely different.”

“I just feel so bad for not being there.” He sighed, covering his eyes with his hands.

“It wasn’t entirely your fault Jimmy.” Barbra pointed out.

“I know, and in all honesty, I understand why Cameron never told me she was pregnant in the first place. I would have gotten myself attached to the baby, plus I was still pissed off because of everything that happened.”

“It’s all in the past. Now all you can do is just look forward to the future with your kids and your girlfriend.”

“Thanks Mom,” Jimmy smiled. They talked for a few more minutes before Jimmy hung up his phone. The bus stopped suddenly, so Zack, who was beside the window, turned around to see what was going on.

“Gas station,” he muttered.

“We’re picking someone up while we’re here,” Val muttered, not looking too pleased. She turned to Zack with a glare. “You better be lucky Gena isn’t here anymore.” Val said to him before running off the bus. Jimmy looked at Zack confused as Valary ran back onto the bus, her face in a very twisted scowl as someone walked on behind her. Jimmy shrugged it off, thinking it was one of Gena’s old friends, and stood up, grabbing a bottle of water from the cooler. He took a sip when he heard his name getting shouted, in the last voice he expected.

Choking and sputtering on the water, he turned around and came face to face with the woman who just walked onto the bus.

“Leana?” he asked when he was able to talk again.