I'll Keep You a Daydream Away

Alex’s P.O.V.

As agreed I had to keep up my part of the deal, that’s why I was on my way to Maya’s house. She did seem very surprised when she saw me, but let me in nevertheless.

“So why are you here?” She asked. “To apologize. I’m sorry for snapping at you and throwing you out. You’re still my best friend Maya, I miss you.” Maya smiled a little, trying not to show me. “I don’t know Lex, you were really mean to me….”

I pulled her in a hug, lifting her up. “Please May? Please, forgive me? I miss my best friend!” I said and she laughed. “Alright, alright, I forgive you! Now put me down!” She yelled/laughed. I put her down. “So, what made you decide to come here?” She wondered out loud. “Feline actually.” I said and I saw her stiffen. “She convinced me to stop being so damn stubborn.” I chuckled.

“So the only reason you’re apologizing is because your slut of the week made you do it!” Maya snapped. “What the fuck Maya!” I said. “I thought we were okay. Yeah, Feline made me see how much of an idiot I was and that’s why I came here to make up. If it wasn’t for her we still would be fighting.” I tried to reason with her, but Maya was furious. “If it wasn’t for her we never would have this fight in the first place!” She screamed.

I took a few steps toward her so we were merely inches apart. “Why do you keep on being such a bitch to Feline. She did nothing wrong!” I shouted. “Because I don’t trust the little tramp! That’s why!” She screamed back.

“Don’t call her that! She is one of the sweetest people I know. And I’m in love with her. We’re friends Maya, doesn’t my happiness mean anything to you?”

I could see a few tears escape from her eyes. “Of course it means something to me Alex. I do want you to be happy…. Just not with her! I want to be happy for you, but I can’t.” She sobbed.

“Why Maya? Please explain to me why you can’t be happy for me and Feline?” I asked, my voice a lot softer than before. “Because I’m in love with you!” She cried out, before clamping a hand over her mouth in realization to what she’d just said.

I took a step back. “W-what?” Maya took a step towards me, closing the small distance between us again. “I-I’m in love with you Alex. Ever since high school. I thought it was just a silly crush that would go away, but after all this time I still love you Alex.”

I sat down on the couch and buried my face in my hands. “Why now Maya!” I sighed, sounding exhausted. “Why now? Now that I found someone I actually plan on spending the rest of my life with. If only you’d told me sooner we would….” I abruptly stopped talking, realizing what I was saying. “No, never mind. We can’t.”

“We what Lex?” Maya whispered. “If I’d told you sooner we what?” I slowly looked up at her. “If you’d told me sooner we could have been together.” I said. “Because I was in love with you too back in high school. But those feeling have passed Maya. I love you, I do, but I love Feline more.”

“But you still love me right?” She whispered. I nodded. “A small part of my does still feel that way, but I mostly love you as a friend Maya.” “Can’t we try Alex?” She begged. “Please. I know I can make you love me like that again.” She slowly leaned forward. “Please.” She whispered again, before softly pressing her lips against mine.

The kiss was nice, but there were no fireworks or butterflies like I’d expected. Still, I was finally kissing the girl I’d had a crush on for years back when we were teenagers. And that seemed to be the only thing my mind was registering, because the second our lips touched I gave in. I wrapped my arms around her, pulling her closer, and kissed her back.

The kissed lasted not even a minute before reality slapped me in the face. I let go of Maya and pulled away. “Maya, stop. We can’t. I have Feline. I love her.”

I saw a flash of anger and hurt in her eyes, but she stayed calm. “But you love me too.” She mumbled, sounding like a little kid. I shook my head. “I love Feline more. We’re having a baby Maya, I’m gonna ask her to marry me.” Maya shook her head. “No. NO! You can’t marry her Alex. Please, Alex, don’t marry her.” She begged. “If you ever loved me that please don’t marry her.”

I hugged her close and let her cry. “I did love you Maya. But the was the past. Feline and that baby are my future. I’m so sorry honey.” I slowly let go of her. “I think it better if I go.” She grabbed my shirt. “No, Alex, please don’t leave! I need you. Just tonight, just this once! Please.” She begged.

I shook my head. “Maya I can’t. I could never betray Feline like that.” I said and kissed her forehead. “I have to go Maya. I can’t stay.” I was almost out the door when Maya called me back. “Alex. Can we at least still be friends?” I stopped and turned around. “I don’t know Maya.” I said truthfully. “I want to, but I’m not sure if we can. Just give me some time okay.” And with that I walked away.

The second I opened the door I called out to Feline, who came hurrying out of the kitchen. “Hey Alex, where…” She started, but never got to finish her sentence because I crashed my lips against hers.

She pulled back after a while. “What’s wrong?” She asked. I was a little taken aback by her reaction. I hadn’t realized it was so obvious. I wasn’t sure if I should tell her what happened between Maya and me. Especially since we kissed. I didn’t want to hurt Feline. But for some reason I had a feeling she would understand. So instead of simply waving it off I said….

“She loves me.” Feline nodded. “I know.” My eyes snapped up at hers. “W-what?” Feline smiled a small, sad smile. “Alex it’s so obvious, you can tell just by the way she looks at you.” “Then why didn’t you tell me!” I snapped.

Feline back away a little and I immediately regretted it. “Fay, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to snap at you babe.” Fay nodded stiffly. “That’s fine. Don’t worry about it.” I tried to hug her but she pushed me away. “Feline, sweetie, what….” “Just say it Alex!” She said. “How fast do you want me to leave?” “I-I… WHAT!? What are you talking about?” I was seriously confused.

“Well, she loves you. You love her. I don’t really fit in this picture, do I?” She snapped back. “Feline, I…” I stammered, not sure what to say. “What Alex?” she asked, sounding like she was about to cry. “Don’t leave, I love you.”

Feline sighed. “But you love her too Alex. Don’t even try to deny it.” I shook my head. “I loved her once Fay. Back when we were kids. And yes, maybe a part of me still feels that way, but I love you more.”

Feline smiled a little at me before grabbing her purse and coat. “Where are you going?” I pouted, sounding like a little kid. “I’m gonna stay with Jack for a few days.” “But why?” “Because you have some stuff to sort out. You need to make a decision Alex. I know you love me, but you love her too. Even when you won’t admit it. You need to make a choice Alex and neither I nor Maya can help you with that.”

“Feline I don’t have to make a choice, I already made it.” I said, trying to keep her from leaving. But she shook her head. “No you haven’t. Just, don’t think about hurting me or Maya or about the baby. You need to choose what you want Alex, because you want it, not because it’s what you think is best for everyone else.”

She was almost out the door when I called her back. “Feline, please, don’t leave.” I got down on one knee in front of her. “Marry me?” She pulled me up to my feet and kissed my cheek. “I’d love to Alex, but I can’t say yes right now. I’ll be back in a few days, if you still want to marry me then I’ll say yes, I promise.” She gave me another kiss and walked out the door.

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It’s been only an hour since Feline left and I was already losing my mind. I couldn’t stop thinking about her and I was starting to really miss her.

But I also couldn’t stop thinking about that kiss I ‘d shared with Maya. Maybe Feline was right, maybe I did still love Maya like I had in high school.

Before I’d learned about Feline and our baby I’d often wondered what life would have been like if I’d told Maya how I felt back then. I used to be have a vague idea what it would be like before I met Feline, but now when I tried to picture myself with Maya I came up blank.

When I thought about Feline, I knew she was the one I wanted to grow old with. But was she right and was it only because of the baby? Or was it really because of her?

I rolled over and buried my head in a pillow. Why was this so difficult. Too tired to think about it any further I tried to get some sleep, but my mind kept wandering back at that kiss with Maya.

Slowly I started to fall asleep, trapped in the memory of that one kiss.
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The next morning when I woke up I’d make my decision. I knew who I was going to choose.