Those Nights

I stood at my locker, five minutes earlier I opened it to get a textbook, and just ended up staring at the inside of it. I had a sinking feeling in my stomach and I realized that my life seriously had no meaning, and it wasn't a suicidal thing either, I just truly felt that me being here in high school as a grade 12 student among 1000 other students, was having a midlife crisis. Seventeen years old and I felt like nothing in my mere short life has made sense, especially when there's every reason I should. I live in California, I have happily married parents, an annoying little sister and a family dog. I have a good life compared to a lot of other peoples. Yet here I am; looking like a retard staring into an open locker, trying to understand the hardest question I've ever been asked: "what am I gonna do with my life?" For seventeen years I never thought once about it.
While most guys my age are only concerned about who's gonna end up being their infamous 'one night stand' of the weekend, I'm trying to figure out what I want out of life and what I'm living for...or what I'm supposed to live for...

Suddenly my locker door was slammed shut and against it leaned my perverse friend, Tommy.

"I love this school." He grinned, watching a group of girls walk by.

"Why?" I asked, truly repulsed by the statement.

"Girls in daisy dukes and see-through tank tops, duh!" He chuckled.

"So then you actually mean you love the girls in this school." I smirked.

"Oh yeah." He smiled, closing his eyes, thinking for that moment. I could only guess what he was thinking about, but I avoided the thought.

The first bell of the morning rang.

I cleared my throat. "I gotta get to class Tommy."

"No, c'mon let's go hunting." He gave me his crazy grin. His term 'hunting' meant scoping out the poor vulnerable teenage girls who have yet to realize their overtly physical attractiveness and declare them as his game.

"Tommy c'mon, I don't have time for that." I shrugged my shoulders, about to walk past him.

"What's up with you Wills? I'm trying to get you in with the rest of us guys and you turn down every chance I set up for you. You say you're trying to figure out your life, well maybe this is it." He pushed back my shoulder.

"I highly doubt that Tom, my life isn't about disrespecting a woman and thinking of them as sex objects. I'm still trying to find out what I'm living for and you should too man, it's senior year. In one year our lives begin." I replied.

His attention was taken away in the middle of my statement as he eye'd a California girl strutting by. He patted my shoulder with a smile, "No my friend, my life started now, I'll see ya later." He went chasing after the girl.

I shook my head and laughed to myself, then continued to the first class of the day.

I sat in the back of the room as the teacher told lame jokes and then went on to tell the class about his summer and how he planted his yearly vegetable garden and something about a gnome, I wasn't paying complete attention to his life story since everyone was still recovering from a Summer long hangover. Finally he was finishing up roll call, when the class door was swung open and a girl came stumbling in.

"I don't understand why there's like 50 science rooms in this school." She laughed. I lifted my head and took a better look of her. She had long brown hair and light blue eyes, she didn't look too tall, but she seemed an okay height. She was slim and wore a pair of dark wash jeans and a cardigan with a Nirvana t-shirt underneath.

"Oh you must be the new student, Elizabeth right?" The teacher asked her, looking over his clipboard.

"Yeah." She smiled.

"Oh, well then, class please welcome Elizabeth Bennett." He announced.

"Gee thanks, public humiliation is my favourite." She kidded with him. She actually made him laugh, in all my years at this school, Mr. Carr never laughed...at anyone else's jokes I mean...

"You can take a seat in front of William." He pointed to me. She nodded then cheerfully walked down the aisle of desks and sat down. She turned around and held out her hand to me.

"Hi William, I'm Elizabeth." She grinned.

I smiled and shook her hand. She just smiled and turned back around. I felt a little stupid 'cause I didn't say anything, but she was different. Different than all the other girls I've encountered. Different in her way of dressing, in her personality.

I smiled then looked down at my textbook, following along with Mr. Carr's reading.