Set Fire to Rain

I could hear the arguing voices before I even turned around the corner. Snape and Draco were arguing quietly in the hall way but I could hear them clear as day. They were talking about the task and Draco was insisting that he needed no help. I turned around the corner, faintly rolling my shoulder. I knew that it was burning, where my scar was but I didn’t think much of it. There were greater tasks at hand.
“Would you both quiet down?” I demanded, not caring that Snape was very much my elder. “I could hear you from around the corridor. And you-“ I said pointing my finger at Draco. “- what were you thinking? Lurking in the hall when there is a Christmas party going on? Didn’t you think that Filch would be lurking about for drunk teenagers?”
Draco glared. “I have a task to complete, Potter-“
“Oh are we enemies now?” I asked, voice rising immediately. “Because the last time I checked, you only used the name ‘Potter’ when you’re disgusted with Harry, isn’t that right?”
Snape opened his mouth to scold me but Draco interrupted him. “Why don’t you go run along with your brother now, Reagan. He is your new best friend. What do you care about my task or yours? Or the mark on your arm for all that matter.”
I took a sharp breath. His words stung. “Sure,” I said, voice cracking. “Lie to yourself Draco, pretend you’re the only one who cares, act like this isn’t hard for me too, because you’re the only one who has a task and you’re the only one allowed to feel the weight of the world crashing down on you. You want to do it alone? Fine, do it alone. I won’t disturb you anymore.”
“Reagan I-“
I ignored the rest of his sentence, turning on my heel and hurrying down the hallway, head low. I was breathing rapidly, and my hands were shaking wildly. I could feel the burning in my body, I could feel my heart pounding and my vision began to blur. The darkness inside me was roaring like a wild beast, clawing at the small, dim light inside of me to get out.
A million thoughts began running through my head all at once. My rage towards Draco kept growing the father down the hallway I ran. How could he possibly think that I wasn’t suffering from the pressure, or that I wasn’t dedicated to what I had to do? He had no idea what was on the line for me, he had no clue what burdens were on my shoulders.
I was going to kill because of him. I was giving up everything I had ever known for us. In two weeks time, I was required to come up with something to kill Draco’s mother. I was supposed to end the life of a precious woman, someone who took care of me, someone who believed that I was worth loving. I had to find a way out of it. I was slow dancing in a burning room, and it seemed that I was dancing alone.
Somehow, I expected that becoming close with my brother would save me, and save Narcissa. Walking down the hallway, with my life spiraling out of control, hinted that maybe I was past saving. Draco didn’t know why I had accepted Harry, didn’t know what was ripping at me inside. I had to chose between the life of someone I saw as my mother and the boy I loved. Either way, I lost both of them.
I replayed the scene of Draco yelling at me, the scene of Hermione telling me she would always save Harry, the night that Bane had tried to become something beyond his understanding, and the nights that I would suffer seizures under the rage of Voldemort. Nothing was simple anymore. maybe nothing was ever really simple… just before I had ignored it all and accepted the cruelty of life. This was why most death eaters were alone- because having ties with someone meant their life.
I hated Voldemort. I wanted to kill him myself, I wanted to wash away the filth. He was poison and I wanted so desperately to find a way out. But there was no light at the end of this tunnel it seemed, and I was running out of time. Draco had been no help in that department. He was at a loss as well struggling between trying to find a way to save his mother, but I knew what was keeping him back. He would sacrifice his mother and even himself to save me.
I don’t know how long I walked, but it seemed like hours before I finally drew away from my thunderstorm of thoughts and noticed I had walked outside of the castle. The grass was wet on my bare feet, my heels dangling by the tips of my fingers. The bottom of my dress was frayed and my hair was clinging to my forehead. I stared listlessly into the darkness of the forbidden forest
The air outside was freezing, and goose bumps ran up my arms. I looked around, and saw that it was far to late for anyone to be walking about the grounds. But I got the feeling that I wasn’t alone, I slipped my leg out of the slit of the dress where I wore a thigh sheath for my wand, pulling it out slowly. The hairs on the back of my neck began to stand on end and everything got extremely quite.
And suddenly I was falling. A word was never spoken, and I never saw what happened. But I felt black wash over me, and I felt the use of magic wrap me into a world of blackness.