The Cruel War
You are my way...
The war has begun
And you have to go and fight
It’s a Saturday, in the middle of an eventful 1861. Ella had just woken up and immediately started with her daily activities, lighting the remaining wood in the stove, putting the water to boil and eggs to cook, getting fresh tea in the pot and sighing over a half empty sugar sack.
As the water started to steam up, Ella mixed some flour, eggs and oil, kneading the dough less vigorously than usual. She couldn’t help it. She was sad... or that’s an understatement as she was completely devastated cause he was leaving. Not for work, not for family, but for war.
She fought hard to keep the tears inside, squeezing the dough in her hands and biting her lip, but it was futile, as the fear invaded her blood: Fear for his life, for her life... fear for seeing him walk out the door in two days and never seeing him walk back in. Fear of losing the only thing she had in her life.
Digging her palms in the mix, she glanced over at the blue uniform hanging beside the kitchen’s door. Blue, like the suit he wore at their wedding, but now, clean and ironed, that suit would mark him as a soldier who had to go and fight away from home... away from her.
Ella fought back a sob as she heard the yard door cracking open and she knew Mikey was up, chopping wood in the back, as the unmistakable sound of the axe against the logs sneaked through the window.
She wiped her hands on her apron and got her attention to the eggs and bacon slowly frying on the pan.
Tomorrow is sunday
On monday you must leave...
Placing the food on the table, Ella waited for Mikey to get the logs inside the house and wash himself. She greeted him into the kitchen with a wide smile that barely made up for her teary eyes, and he saw right through her.
“You don’t have to smile if you don’t feel like to.” He said walking close to her and kissing her forehead. She sighed.
“Take a seat, I’ll get your coffee.” Mikey complied and sat down, immediately getting bacon on his plate.
“When are you making pancakes again?” He asked casually, regretting it a second later as he saw her face flinch as she walked with the hot water and poured some in his cup. “I’m sorry...”
“Don’t be.” She said, placing the pot back on the stove. “I’ll try to make some tomorrow.”
Mikey started eating. Ella just stared down to her tea, taking deep breaths and trying to gain the courage to ask.
“Honey, just say it...” Mikey said looking at her sweetly.
“Will you let me come with you?” She blurted out
“No, my dear. No.”
Your country calls for you
But so does my heart...
Both got their attention back to the food on their plates, Mikey eating, Ella just picking on it.
“Honey, I know this is hard, but I can’t let you come with me.”
“Why not?” She said looking at him. “If it’s the only way I can be with you, I’m willing to take the chance.” Mikey dropped the fork on the plate and sighed.
“That’s no place for women.”
“Then I’ll turn into a man! I can get another uniform like yours and...”
“Ella...”
“I can dress like a man! And cut my hair!” She pleaded once more.
“Ella...”
“Please, Mikey. I’ll be just one more of the guys and I’ll go with you everywhere.” She said taking his hands on hers. “Will you let me come with you?”
“No, my dear. No.”
I’ll be just another partner
And I’ll follow you all the way
Ella sat back on the chair biting her lip and looking down as silence fell between them, broken only by the creaking sounds of the remaining wood burning in the stove.
“Don’t go.” She said dryly.
“I have to...”
“No! Your place is with your wife!”
“I have to go and you know it.” He spoke calmly as she stared at him and shook her head.
“I can’t... I can’t watch you go while I stay here, Mikey.” She said trying to maintain a steady voice as the tears fell down her face, making her chin quiver. “I just can’t sit and wait, not even knowing if you’ll be back.”
“But I’ll be back, Ella...”
“You don’t know that!” She raised her voice now, not caring anymore on holding back the sobs and the tears. “If you die... I wanna die with you. And if you leave... I’ll die anyways!” She buried her face on her hands, her shoulders shaking. Mikey dragged his chair to her side and hugged her close. “I can’t take it, Mikey! I love you too much!”
“I love you too.” He said cupping her damp face and kissing her soft and deep. Letting her know how much he loved her. Letting her show him how much she loved him. And he knew she was right. Ella took a deep breath and leaned her forehead against him, staring at him through her tears.
“Will you let me come with you?”
“Yes, my dear. Yes.”
And you have to go and fight
It’s a Saturday, in the middle of an eventful 1861. Ella had just woken up and immediately started with her daily activities, lighting the remaining wood in the stove, putting the water to boil and eggs to cook, getting fresh tea in the pot and sighing over a half empty sugar sack.
As the water started to steam up, Ella mixed some flour, eggs and oil, kneading the dough less vigorously than usual. She couldn’t help it. She was sad... or that’s an understatement as she was completely devastated cause he was leaving. Not for work, not for family, but for war.
She fought hard to keep the tears inside, squeezing the dough in her hands and biting her lip, but it was futile, as the fear invaded her blood: Fear for his life, for her life... fear for seeing him walk out the door in two days and never seeing him walk back in. Fear of losing the only thing she had in her life.
Digging her palms in the mix, she glanced over at the blue uniform hanging beside the kitchen’s door. Blue, like the suit he wore at their wedding, but now, clean and ironed, that suit would mark him as a soldier who had to go and fight away from home... away from her.
Ella fought back a sob as she heard the yard door cracking open and she knew Mikey was up, chopping wood in the back, as the unmistakable sound of the axe against the logs sneaked through the window.
She wiped her hands on her apron and got her attention to the eggs and bacon slowly frying on the pan.
Tomorrow is sunday
On monday you must leave...
Placing the food on the table, Ella waited for Mikey to get the logs inside the house and wash himself. She greeted him into the kitchen with a wide smile that barely made up for her teary eyes, and he saw right through her.
“You don’t have to smile if you don’t feel like to.” He said walking close to her and kissing her forehead. She sighed.
“Take a seat, I’ll get your coffee.” Mikey complied and sat down, immediately getting bacon on his plate.
“When are you making pancakes again?” He asked casually, regretting it a second later as he saw her face flinch as she walked with the hot water and poured some in his cup. “I’m sorry...”
“Don’t be.” She said, placing the pot back on the stove. “I’ll try to make some tomorrow.”
Mikey started eating. Ella just stared down to her tea, taking deep breaths and trying to gain the courage to ask.
“Honey, just say it...” Mikey said looking at her sweetly.
“Will you let me come with you?” She blurted out
“No, my dear. No.”
Your country calls for you
But so does my heart...
Both got their attention back to the food on their plates, Mikey eating, Ella just picking on it.
“Honey, I know this is hard, but I can’t let you come with me.”
“Why not?” She said looking at him. “If it’s the only way I can be with you, I’m willing to take the chance.” Mikey dropped the fork on the plate and sighed.
“That’s no place for women.”
“Then I’ll turn into a man! I can get another uniform like yours and...”
“Ella...”
“I can dress like a man! And cut my hair!” She pleaded once more.
“Ella...”
“Please, Mikey. I’ll be just one more of the guys and I’ll go with you everywhere.” She said taking his hands on hers. “Will you let me come with you?”
“No, my dear. No.”
I’ll be just another partner
And I’ll follow you all the way
Ella sat back on the chair biting her lip and looking down as silence fell between them, broken only by the creaking sounds of the remaining wood burning in the stove.
“Don’t go.” She said dryly.
“I have to...”
“No! Your place is with your wife!”
“I have to go and you know it.” He spoke calmly as she stared at him and shook her head.
“I can’t... I can’t watch you go while I stay here, Mikey.” She said trying to maintain a steady voice as the tears fell down her face, making her chin quiver. “I just can’t sit and wait, not even knowing if you’ll be back.”
“But I’ll be back, Ella...”
“You don’t know that!” She raised her voice now, not caring anymore on holding back the sobs and the tears. “If you die... I wanna die with you. And if you leave... I’ll die anyways!” She buried her face on her hands, her shoulders shaking. Mikey dragged his chair to her side and hugged her close. “I can’t take it, Mikey! I love you too much!”
“I love you too.” He said cupping her damp face and kissing her soft and deep. Letting her know how much he loved her. Letting her show him how much she loved him. And he knew she was right. Ella took a deep breath and leaned her forehead against him, staring at him through her tears.
“Will you let me come with you?”
“Yes, my dear. Yes.”