Out of Darkness

“Have you given any thought to what you might want for Christmas?” Shinya asked Tori quietly as they lay together in his bed in gentle contentment. Her head was resting on his chest as she played with his hair and his arms were secured around her in a loving and protective embrace that let her know exactly how much he cared for her. Her glasses lay on the table beside the bed, forgotten as they held each other.

“Not much thought… why, are you thinking of going shopping?” she teased.

“Possibly.” He laughed.

“What do I want for Christmas…” she mused thoughtfully, “Do you really want to know what the perfect gift would be?”

“Of course I do.”

“I want to spend Christmas day with you. Just like this.” She smiled, snuggling into his chest and kissing it lightly, causing him to tighten his embrace around her.

“Of course you can spend Christmas here. I wouldn’t want to spend the holiday any other way.” He smiled while rubbing her arms and breathing in the light Cherry Blossom scent from her hair.

She giggled as he nuzzled deeper into her hair to be farther engulfed with the scent that she carried, and planted another kiss on his chest. She felt butterflies attacking the inside of her stomach when he carefully tilted her head up so that he could kiss her properly, and felt herself drowning in his embrace as his lips claimed hers.

“I never want to let go,” she whispered, not meaning to speak her thoughts aloud and blushing a light pink when she heard his quiet laughter.

“Unfortunately, we have two dogs that need to be let outside. If we aren’t responsible with them, they could leave messes for us to clean.” He smiled and guided her to sit up so that he could leave the comfort of his bed, instantly feeling the chill of empty air attacking his body where hers rested before.

“I suppose we have to get up then, don’t we.” She stated, frowning while feeling around for her glasses. She could have sworn she heard him put them on the bedside table, but she couldn’t find them anywhere. She felt panic beginning to rise as the fear of going a day without her glasses began to become real, and began to search a little more frantically until she felt his weight on the bed behind her, and his hands on her shoulders, curling his long fingers around her small arms.

“Tori-san,” he spoke gently, “we are the only ones in the house. Why not leave them for one day?” he asked.

“I… I can’t,” she whispered, feeling herself begin to shake in his hands.

“Why not, what will happen?”

“I, Shinya, I don’t know. I just can’t.”

“I won’t make you.” He assured, kissing her cheek while placing her glasses in her hand, “And I will not judge you.” And with that he left the room, announcing that if he didn’t hurry Achilles was sure to leave a nice sized puddle for him to clean by the door.

She sat on the bed holding her glasses while listening to him moving about the house, laughing at the sound of Achilles’ heavy paws thudding around, followed by Miyu’s light feet and tiny claws padding and clicking along behind him as always.

She felt her way to the door to make sure it was closed before navigating her way to the closet where Shinya had made room for her clothes. Lilith had been kind enough to tie decorative but discrete charms to each of her new garments that matched. Each style had a specific bead, and clothes that matched other styles had multiple beads attached to them for each one that they matched.

She pulled out a pair of black skinny jeans, and a white tank top with the same bead hanging from a small tie at the bottom so that it was barely visible. Over that she found a vest with the matching bead and put that on with the bra that had been deemed appropriate for any and all outfits. After getting dressed and fighting with the vest as it had gotten twisted, she brushed her hair until there were no tangles left, leaving it smooth and bouncy around her shoulders which to her was a sign that it looked at least a little better.
She stood beside the bed with her glasses in her hands, debating on whether or not she should wear them. Shinya had seen her without them already, and he hadn’t said anything but encouragement over her eyes. He said that they were beautiful. He said that without the glasses he could finally see HER.

With a heavy sigh she put her glasses in the pocket of her vest, just in case, and made her way carefully out of the bedroom, greeted by the smell of breakfast.

“Tori-san, you aren’t wearing glasses.” Shinya beamed, rushing to her side to guide her to the table, as she didn’t have her cane with her.

“No, but I have them with me.” She nodded with a nervous laugh, “Don’t forget about the food in your excitement.” She reminded, hearing him gasp before his footsteps quickly went to the other side of the room and she heard pans moving around. She giggled her thanks as he placed her plate in front of her before taking his seat across from her.

Their breakfast was spent mostly in silence, with Shinya occasionally marveling over how beautiful she looked, and how well her new clothes fit her personality. She looked so much more confident dressed in new clothes that seemed to express who she was, instead of resale trash that her parents had gotten for her. He secretly hoped that Brandon had burned that green kitten sweater.

After breakfast Shinya and Tori spent the day relaxing and talking about their lives during the tour. He would tell her stories about live shows, describe strange gifts from fans that he and the other Dir en grey members had been given, and go into every detail for her of what the touring life was like. And in return she would tell him about the few times she and Brandon went out together, and spare him any negative details of her life, knowing that he felt terribly guilty for having to leave her in the hospital that day to finish the tour.

Shinya never realized how much time Tori spent asleep until he spent a full day with her, but also understood that there wasn’t much to keep the blind woman occupied, and when she was asleep, she was free of her blindness; she could dream of sight. She couldn’t read a book, or solve a puzzle, or watch a movie like most people would have to end their boredom.

They spent hours together laughing in the studio either going through a drumming lesson, or with him playing drums while she sang and played piano for him. But after that he had trouble thinking of things that could entertain the both of them. He eventually took to reading a book to her, but after one and a half chapters he found that she had fallen asleep on his shoulder.

He laughed quietly to himself while very, very carefully moving away from her, lying her neatly on the couch to sleep while he went to get a blanket for her. As she slept he went onto the Internet to look for the perfect Christmas gift for her, dialing Kaoru’s number the moment he found it.