Another Day, Another Hotel
SURPRISE!
I'm watching through the window as Joey is riding his bicycle around the driveway and Jakob is curled up on the lawn drawing. Penguins, no doubt. He just loves penguins.
"Billie," a voice calls from behind me and I feel a hand on my back. I turn around to see Adrienne. She smiles at me. I turn back around and I hear her again.
" Billie. Billie. Billie Joe." Suddenly I feel a sharp pain in my back and hear
"BILLIE FUCKING JOE!"...
"What?!" I scream, sitting up to find Mike, Tre and Jason standing over me on the bed.
"It's time to get up, lovemuffin!" Mike says in an overly cheery voice. I groan and pull the blanket over my head.
"Go away, losers," I mumble. Immediately the bed starts jerking around and I find myself face down on the floor, with the three of them jumping on the bed like morons.
" Come on, get up and get ready. We're going to get food," Jason says landing next to me with a thump.
"Can't you just order me up something?" I say.
"No," Mike says grabbing for my suitcase. He pitches it next to me on the floor.
"Wait," Tre says, looking like he has big plans. Great. Tre has plans. I really don't want to know, but I ask,
"What now, stupid face?"
He looks at the others.
"You can stay and we'll go down. Don't worry. I know you like to sleep in after a late night," Tre says, motioning for the rest to move out. "Come on, lets go. We'll see you later, Billie Joe." He pushes them out the door. I heard Mike say as he's going out the door,
"What the fuck are you doin', man," but Tre just keeps going.
"We'll order you up something!" I hear Tre shout from the hall.
By now, I'm fully awake and really, really don't want to know what Tre means, but I do know that I want to climb back into bed.
"They always wake me up during good dreams," I say as I hoist myself up of the floor. I rifle through my suitcase to find some clothes that aren't dirty. We've been on the road pretty much nonstop and haven't necessarily had time to drop by a laundry mat. I pull on a pair of pants and a shirt that Jakob gave me- penguins, of course, and I shuffle to the bathroom to brush my teeth. I stare at myself in the mirror while I wait for the water to warm up. I think I can see my brown roots showing and that makes me think of Adie. She always dyes my hair for me. Most people don't believe me when I say that, but it's true; my wife dyes my hair in the downstairs bathroom where the cats sleep. Glamourous, huh?
Suddenly, I'm shaken out of my thoughts by a knock at the room door.
"Wunderbar," I say to myself quietly, shutting the faucet off. I pad over to the door.
" What?" I say to the door, hoping whoever was behind it would just go away. They only respond with more knocking.
Sighing, I unlatch the lock, pull open the door and just as I look up, I hear
"DAD!" and am leaped on by my boys. We fall back and I kiss them on their foreheads and throw myself at Adie, kissing allover her face and neck.
I can't remember when I was happier to see them.
"Billie," a voice calls from behind me and I feel a hand on my back. I turn around to see Adrienne. She smiles at me. I turn back around and I hear her again.
" Billie. Billie. Billie Joe." Suddenly I feel a sharp pain in my back and hear
"BILLIE FUCKING JOE!"...
"What?!" I scream, sitting up to find Mike, Tre and Jason standing over me on the bed.
"It's time to get up, lovemuffin!" Mike says in an overly cheery voice. I groan and pull the blanket over my head.
"Go away, losers," I mumble. Immediately the bed starts jerking around and I find myself face down on the floor, with the three of them jumping on the bed like morons.
" Come on, get up and get ready. We're going to get food," Jason says landing next to me with a thump.
"Can't you just order me up something?" I say.
"No," Mike says grabbing for my suitcase. He pitches it next to me on the floor.
"Wait," Tre says, looking like he has big plans. Great. Tre has plans. I really don't want to know, but I ask,
"What now, stupid face?"
He looks at the others.
"You can stay and we'll go down. Don't worry. I know you like to sleep in after a late night," Tre says, motioning for the rest to move out. "Come on, lets go. We'll see you later, Billie Joe." He pushes them out the door. I heard Mike say as he's going out the door,
"What the fuck are you doin', man," but Tre just keeps going.
"We'll order you up something!" I hear Tre shout from the hall.
By now, I'm fully awake and really, really don't want to know what Tre means, but I do know that I want to climb back into bed.
"They always wake me up during good dreams," I say as I hoist myself up of the floor. I rifle through my suitcase to find some clothes that aren't dirty. We've been on the road pretty much nonstop and haven't necessarily had time to drop by a laundry mat. I pull on a pair of pants and a shirt that Jakob gave me- penguins, of course, and I shuffle to the bathroom to brush my teeth. I stare at myself in the mirror while I wait for the water to warm up. I think I can see my brown roots showing and that makes me think of Adie. She always dyes my hair for me. Most people don't believe me when I say that, but it's true; my wife dyes my hair in the downstairs bathroom where the cats sleep. Glamourous, huh?
Suddenly, I'm shaken out of my thoughts by a knock at the room door.
"Wunderbar," I say to myself quietly, shutting the faucet off. I pad over to the door.
" What?" I say to the door, hoping whoever was behind it would just go away. They only respond with more knocking.
Sighing, I unlatch the lock, pull open the door and just as I look up, I hear
"DAD!" and am leaped on by my boys. We fall back and I kiss them on their foreheads and throw myself at Adie, kissing allover her face and neck.
I can't remember when I was happier to see them.